


Trouble With Authority

by jensenisafallenangel



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bad Boy Dean, Bisexual Dean, Canon-Typical Violence, Coming Out, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Fighting, First Kiss, First Love, First Time, High School, Homophobic John, M/M, Military School, Slow Burn, Smoking, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-21
Updated: 2015-07-15
Packaged: 2018-03-31 14:50:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 76,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3982111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jensenisafallenangel/pseuds/jensenisafallenangel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean is sent to Lawrence Military Academy where he meets Castiel Novak, an uptight rule follower who does everything by the book. They immediately clash since Dean isn't big on following rules and the boys seem like opposites. If they get past their fighting, maybe Dean can teach Cas a little bit about rebelling.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Welcome to the Jungle

**Author's Note:**

> "Welcome to the jungle, it gets worse here everyday. Learn to live like an animal in the jungle where we play. You can have anything you want but you better not take it from me." - Welcome to the Jungle, Guns N Roses

“He’s actually driving away,” Dean thought bitterly, “I can’t believe he’s actually leaving me here.”

“Winchester, are you listening to me?"

The cold voice snapped Dean back from his thoughts to the office he was in. His eyes moved from the dirty window on his left where he watched the old, sleek black car he loved drive away. It wasn’t the most important object in the universe by any means but to him it was. 

He looked back to the gray-haired and balding man sitting across the large desk from him. The office was pretty small and smelled like cheap, days old coffee. On the desk were very organized stacks of papers and one cup of pens and pencils. The office was uninteresting but so was the smug guy in a suit it belonged to. 

“Like I was saying,” the man sneered, “you have everything you need here.” 

He pushed several papers across the desk. Dean picked them up and found a class schedule, list of expectations from students, a map of the campus and a few other things he didn’t want to look at yet. He already hated this place. It was mid-September and he hadn’t missed too much of class but it wouldn’t matter. Dean wasn’t much for studying, never had been. 

“Thanks,” Dean said, with only a hint of sarcasm. 

“Thank you…?” the man said, leaving the end of the sentence off like he expected Dean to finish it. 

Dean didn’t know what he wanted him to say so he just sat there. He was used to teachers and administrators making him feel stupid out of a fucked up sense of superiority they had. New school, same type of douchebag in charge. This guy was no different, just another bully. One who definitely gave Dean the creeps. 

“Thank you, _sir_ ,” he said. “You’ve got a lot to learn here at Lawrence Military Academy, Winchester.”

Dean took that as a dismissal. He didn’t say anything as he picked up his duffel bag and his well-worn backpack after he stuffed all but the map inside and took note of the name placard on the desk that read, “Colonel Zachariah Milton.” After making a mental note to avoid the guy if possible while he was here, he left his office. 

He looked at his map, located the administrative building he was now outside of, and then headed towards the dormitory buildings which were called barracks here. 

_Freakin’ military school lingo_ , Dean thought, kicking a small stone as he walked. He couldn’t remember ever feeling more out of place, or alone, in his life. He had been here for less than an hour and hated it. Of all the places he could get stuck at, this was the worst.

The sun was close to setting and he wanted to find where he would be sleeping before it got dark. Not wanting to stick out even more as the dumb new guy, Dean folded his map and put it in the back pocket of his jeans. That routine had gotten old a long time ago. He didn’t want to be like the people here but he also didn’t want to get singled out. 

_Screw this_ , Dean thought. No way was he staying here. Not for long anyways. In fact, the list of rules he just got from that Milton creep would be his guide. His guide to getting kicked out and the sooner the better. 

There was still enough daylight to see the campus as he walked around. As much as he had already decided to hate it, Dean had to begrudgingly admit it was beautiful. Plenty of trees with their leaves changing color, bright green grass and gorgeous buildings. The architecture on some of them was really pretty cool. Hell, even the sidewalk was in great condition.

He walked up to a clearly old but well-maintained building. There was even some ivy growing on the side which gave it a classic feel. Dean didn’t know how old the school was but he would have guessed at least one hundred years old. Once he walked inside, he saw several guys in different colored T-shirts and sweatpants that all read “LMA” and proudly displayed the school’s crest playing pool on the right. Dean laughed to himself and figured one of the first things he should do was to hustle some of their parents’ money off of them. The one guy on the couches to Dean’s left was reading a book but stopped when he saw him.

“You must be Dean,” the guy greeted with a deep voice that had a slight Southern twang and an extended hand. 

They were roughly the same height and probably the same age but this guy already had some stubble going on. He was also wearing casual clothes with the school’s brand all over it. Dean’s flannel shirt over a black tee was not helping him blend in which he actually kind of appreciated.

“Yeah,” Dean answered, “Who are you?”

“Your roommate,” he replied. “Name’s Benny.”

“Nice to meet you, Benny,” Dean said, shaking his hand. 

Dean followed Benny up the stairs to their room on the third floor. Their door already had two name plates that read “B. Lafitte” and “D. Winchester.” 

“Huh. You guys are quick,” Dean observed. He had only known he was coming here for about a week. The school only knew for about five days.

“They prefer efficient,” Benny joked with a smile as he opened the door. Dean smiled back. Maybe everything about this place wouldn’t completely suck after all. Benny didn’t seem like a rich douchebag like the other guys downstairs. Dean had been known to clash with guys like that all too frequently at previous schools.

Dean dropped both of his bags on the floor on the empty side. Each half of the room had a twin bed with a wooden, three-drawer dresser at the foot of it. There were also two wooden desks complete with uncomfortable looking wooden chairs along the same wall as the door and a window between the beds. It was simple and pretty much what Dean would have expected at a military school. He opened his duffel bag and pulled out a dark brown leather jacket.

“Neat coat,” Benny said, plopping onto his made bed. Dean had sheets, a pillow and pillowcase at the edge of his bare mattress. 

“Thanks. It’s my dad’s. He doesn’t know I took it,” Dean smirked. _Serves him right_ , he added as an afterthought. _He’s a bastard for sticking me here._

Benny started to read again. Dean patted the pocket and felt his pack of cigarettes as he shrugged the slightly too big coat on. His bags had been searched on his way in but they didn’t look in any pockets. They had only been looking for larger stuff like a flask of booze or porn, Dean figured. The cigarettes made it in safely. As welcome as a stiff drink would have been at the moment, Dean would have to settle for a decent nicotine high.

“I’m gonna take a walk around,” Dean said, heading back to the door. 

“Want me to come with, give you a tour or something?” Benny offered, lowering his book.

“Nah, that’s all right, man.”

Benny seemed cool and it was really nice of him to offer since not everyone is always so nice to the new kid but Dean needed to just walk around and have a smoke by himself. This was all feeling surreal and he wanted to think and take it all in. 

Dean shut the door and went out the same way he had come in. He exited the building and made two lefts to go off the beaten path a little. He pulled out a cigarette and his Zippo lighter as he leaned against a secluded side of the building. As he closed his eyes, he lit the smoke and inhaled before placing the Zippo back in the jacket’s pocket. 

He let the smoke fill his lungs and exhaled slowly. Dean could already tell this school was going to be a huge adjustment. He was used to public schools were he went home every day. Now, he lived in barracks and the strict rules would definitely be a problem. That packet from Milton felt pretty thick and Dean wasn’t big on rule following. 

“You shouldn’t be smoking,” a voice on Dean’s right said. He didn’t hear anyone walk up and was inhaling when he was startled. 

“Jesus…fuck,” Dean stammered then coughed, almost dropping his cigarette. “What the hell, man?”

He aimed a glare at the boy who spoke who was standing a few feet away in a freshly pressed, crisp, green military uniform. Dean gathered himself as he took the guy in, looking him up and down. It was a little hard to make him out in the diminishing sunlight but he looked to be about Dean’s age, sixteen, and trim. Also judging by the looks of him, he probably acted older. His posture was unnaturally upright, almost painful looking, and he had unruly dark brown hair that didn’t match the tidiness of everything else about him. The kid took a couple steps and was close enough for Dean to make out the intense, piercing blue eyes that were staring back, sizing him up. 

“You can’t sneak up on people like that,” Dean accused, looking away as he continued to smoke. 

He looked away so he would stop staring. The kid was decent looking but just because he was attractive in a nerdy way didn’t mean he could scare Dean. Or tell him what to do. They were about the same age and Dean was not going to take his shit. He had punched kids out for less than that before. 

“You shouldn’t be smoking,” he repeated. 

“What’s it to you?” Dean rolled his eyes. 

He wasn’t in the mood for a lecture on his health. The guy stepped in front of Dean, almost too close. Normally, Dean wouldn’t hate the idea of a hot guy in his space but this one was pissing him off. He felt his heart speed up a little, anxiety catching up to him. There were usually only a couple of reasons someone got that close to someone else. 

“It’s against the rules,” he said, very much in Dean’s personal space. His eyes flicked to the stranger’s very pink lips. It felt like it was about to become a fight. Or a make-out session. 

“Fuck the rules,” Dean said, taking the opportunity to inhale and then blow the smoke into the boy’s face. That caused him to take a step back, a sour look on his face. Okay, definitely a fight. 

“That’s better, Nowak,” Dean tried to read the nametag on his uniform. 

“Novak,” Novak corrected sternly.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I forgot to care.”

Novak clenched his fists at his sides, glared and opened his mouth like he was going to say something. A fight would be a good way to get in trouble right off the bat so Dean was down. This was just another rich boy who was used to hiding behind daddy’s money. Dean had to admit that this one had guts but he would show him. This dude seemed scrawny enough and Dean could probably take him.

“Is there a problem here?” 

Their heads turned to see a black kid about their age in the same uniform Novak had on.

“No, Raphael,” Novak answered, looking at the ground, “there isn’t.”

Dean smirked and took a final drag off his smoke.

“There’s no smoking on the grounds,” Raphael pointed out, turning his attention to Dean.

“I’m not,” Dean said as he crushed the butt under his boot. He clapped Novak on the shoulder which seemed to jar him a bit and made Dean laugh.

“Later, Nowak,” Dean jeered before he walked away, brushing past Raphael. 

 

~

 

Dean went back into his room. Benny was lounging on his bed reading but Dean couldn’t tell what it was. It was a plain hardcover that lacked its protective sleeve. He made a mental note to ask later. Maybe it was Vonnegut and they could talk or something new he hadn’t read and could borrow. 

“How was your walk?” Benny asked with just a hint of teasing. Dean was glad they already picked up an easy banter.

“Refreshing,” Dean joked back. “I made a couple of friends.”

Benny raised his eyebrows but Dean didn’t care to elaborate further. No reason to think about the attractive rule follower and the other one, Raphael. It was hard not to, though. The kid, Novak, looked good in his military uniform and his authoritative voice was hot. Too bad he was so over the top frustrating. 

He took his dad’s jacket off and placed it on his desk chair. He figured he might as well make his bed with the stiff sheets he was provided and the scratchy, thin blanket. Their lack of color matched the rest of the drab room pretty well. It seemed like they had gone through the wash a few times too many and lost their possibly once blue color. Gray and gray fit the room well. 

“Make sure it’s tight,” Benny advised, “they do inspections.”

“Seriously?” Dean said, pausing in his work. 

“Military school,” Benny shrugged, “of course they do.”

Dean shook his head. There was no way this would work. He had always had an issue with authority unless it was his own father’s orders. A long list of past teachers could attest to that. Thinking about his dad got him thinking about what he saw and why he was here…

“Something wrong?” 

Benny snapped Dean out of his memory which he was thankful for. He didn’t need to dwell on that. 

“Fine. Just hate making my bed,” Dean deflected. If there was one thing he was good at, it was avoiding conversations about his feelings or whatever. 

Benny went back to his book. Dean collapsed on his freshly made bed with his iPod. He put in his headphones and cranked it, hoping to try to keep his mind blank. He didn’t want to think about home or the kid he met outside. Movement out of the corner of his eye caused him to turn his head and he saw Benny waving to get his attention.

“Sorry man, is it too loud?” Dean asked, taking an earbud out. 

“No, no I was checking… is that AC/DC?”

“Hell yeah! You a fan?” 

“Yeah! Hang on,” Benny got up, “I’ve got speakers.” 

He found them and plugged in Dean’s iPod to crank “Highway to Hell.” They sang along to it and did so to the following Metallica then Led Zeppelin songs but sharp knocking on the door interrupted them. Benny went to press pause on the iPod.

“Leave it,” Dean instructed as he strode to the door. 

He opened it to find Novak from earlier, still in his uniform.

“Oh, you again,” he said. Dean could barely hear him over the music.

“Nice to see you, too,” Dean retorted in a slight yell to be heard. He turned to Benny and gave him a nod to stop the music then back to face their visitor. “What do you want?”

“I was going to ask you to turn the music down. It’s Sunday and some of us are trying to get work done. It’s against…”

“Do not say the rules,” Dean snapped and the guy visibly tensed. “What isn’t?”

The guest set his mouth in a hard line and they glared at each other until Benny cleared his throat. 

“Just keep it down, okay? Lafitte, you should know better,” Novak said. Dean didn’t see but Benny nodded his head behind him. 

“Whatever you say, Nowak,” Dean said, starting to shut the door. 

“Novak,” Novak corrected, clearly annoyed Dean got his name wrong again. 

“Yeah,” Dean smirked, closing the door. 

Dean flopped on his bed with a groan. How did he have such rotten luck? Twice in less than an hour he had a run-in with the guy and he disliked him. A lot. He must be one of the few kids who wanted to be at this stupid school and weren’t shipped off by their families so then he decided to act all high and mighty over everyone else. 

“Who the hell does that guy think he is?” 

“He’s a platoon leader,” Benny explained. 

“What the hell is that?” Dean asked. He didn’t sit up but turned his head to look at Benny.

“It means he’s important and in charge of you.” 

That would explain Novak’s attitude. Benny laughed at Dean’s ignorance, but not in a mean way, he was clearly just amused. That Zachariah jerk wasn’t lying; Dean had a lot to learn. 

“He’s also your next-door neighbor,” Benny continued.

“Of course he is. Is that why you listen to him?”

“That’s one reason,” Benny said, shrugging one shoulder.

“You got a better one?” Dean pried. 

“I get in too much trouble, I lose my scholarship. No scholarship means I have to go home and to be honest I would rather not do that,” Benny made clear.

“Well, that I can understand,” Dean said with a scornful laugh. 

It was nice being on the same page as his roommate so quickly. Home was a tricky subject that Dean would avoid talking about if he could. Dean knew he came off a little rough around the edges when he first met people so friends weren’t always so easy to come by. As the new kid, friends could come in handy but he never needed them before. But Benny was a good guy and not a dick like their neighbor. Plus, there was a lot Benny knew about this place Dean didn’t. The kid could be a valuable ally while he was stuck here. 

“Are you going to unpack?” Benny changed the subject, gesturing at Dean’s bags. 

Dean didn’t even think to do so. He didn’t see the point. 

“I don’t plan on being here for that long.”


	2. Highway to Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "No stop signs, speed limits. Nobody's gonna slow me down. Like a wheel, gonna spin it. Nobody's gonna mess me around." Highway to Hell, AC/DC

Harsh, brass music notes woke Dean up the next morning which was disorienting to say the least. He opened one eye and saw Benny already making his bed and the sun barely over the horizon breaking through the window on quite a gray, dismal Monday. 

“What the fuck…” Dean groaned into his pillow. 

Besides wishing he was asleep, Dean also wished his pillow was softer and didn’t smell faintly of mothballs. A better mattress would have been welcome, too. His back seemed to have aged thirty years, at least, overnight.

“Reveille, it’s every morning. You get used to it,” Benny shrugged. 

How could anyone get used to waking up at the ass-crack of dawn? It was ridiculous. No way could Dean deal with this military crap. He didn’t have any doubts about that yesterday and this only solidified his hatred of this stupid place. 

Benny continued to make his bed and Dean closed his eyes again. He was starting to drift off when two sharp knocks on their door startled him awake. He heard the footsteps of whoever walked in and sat up in his bed. A grown man in a uniform strolled in, exuding confidence. 

“Lafitte, looks good,” the man commented. 

“Thank you, sir,” Benny answered the black man in a military uniform with a few medals on the chest. 

“Winchester, I presume?” the man whose nametag read “Henriksen” asked. “On your feet.”

It was an obvious command and Dean listened. 

“Didn’t Lafitte tell you about making your bed?” Henriksen wanted to know. 

“Yeah, he might have mentioned it,” Dean said. He started to yawn but it died halfway through because Henriksen stepped in front of him and he was kind of intimidating. 

“That bed better be made perfectly tomorrow or you’ll get a demerit.”

“I don’t know what that is,” Dean shrugged, not very concerned. 

Henriksen raised his eyebrows at Dean’s flippant tone. Surely, he wasn’t used to anyone talking back. 

“Sir,” Dean added half-seriously. 

“Ask Lafitte what a demerit is,” Henriksen instructed. After a final glare, he left the room. 

“A demerit is like a warning. They build up and you…. You don’t want that,” Benny explained without Dean asking. 

Day one was just beginning and Dean already was in trouble. Perfect. Dean wondered how many demerits he needed before he was kicked out. He didn’t bother making his bed since he figured he couldn’t get in more trouble for it until tomorrow. The two of them headed to breakfast. 

~

Breakfast was pretty boring, the people and the food. Dean was introduced to many of their fellow students by Benny as he ate his bland oatmeal but quickly forgot their names. To Dean, they all seemed like cookie-cutter rule following robots. It wouldn’t matter anyways. His dad would come back to get him after he thought Dean learned his lesson. Or if Dean got himself kicked out. Whichever came first. His dad would be pissed if he got booted, no doubt, but he would deal with that later. At least he wouldn’t be here. 

It seemed like most of the juniors had classes together since it was a pretty small school. There were really only enough students in every grade to fill two classes at a time. Half of the juniors would have class together but the half depended on the class. That meant Dean would get to know pretty much everyone his age here. Great. 

Also, as Benny was describing last night, Novak was a platoon leader. The juniors and seniors were split into two companies then four platoons, two in each company, then eight squads total. Benny himself was a squad leader and according to Dean’s paperwork from Zachariah, he was Dean’s squad leader. That wouldn’t suck, Dean figured. Their pesky neighbor was their platoon leader. There was more of Dean’s rotten luck. Of course the one kid Dean had a genuine problem with he was stuck answering to. 

“That explains his dick-ish attitude,” Dean complained once Benny finished. 

You don’t get a position like that without kissing ass and following rules. It wasn’t a surprise that Novak would be that type. Dean only talked to him twice and could already tell he was a blind follower who didn’t question orders, which was excellent in a place like military school. 

“Castiel? He’s not that bad,” Benny tried, “once you get to know him.”

“He’s way too uptight,” Dean commented, ignoring the weird name. 

“No arguing there,” Benny laughed a little.

 

Before classes, Dean went to pick up his own starchy and stiff green uniform, complete with name tag. There was a change of uniform as well as a more formal uniform and many sweats and t-shirts with the school’s logo on it for casual wear and for exercising and drills. There was no chance in taking them back to his room and being on time to his first class so that’s exactly what he did. He at least changed quickly and hurried to his history class where Benny said he would save him a seat. 

Of course, the teacher was Henriksen. He had just started talking when Dean walked into the classroom.

“And that’s why…” he paused when he saw Dean, “Winchester. You’re really not getting a good start here. Sit down. As I was saying…”

Henriksen kept talking about whatever historical event he had been droning on about before Dean interrupted him. Dean could tell from everyone’s faces that being late was rare since they all looked shocked. Except Benny, who looked kind of amused. Dean was glad he bit the bullet and changed into the uniform all the students wore since Dean didn’t really want to get on Henriksen’s bad side. Well, farther onto his bad side. Dude meant business. The class sat up straight and they all had their eyes on him which was very different from the public schools Dean was used to where a teacher was lucky to get a few students’ attention at a time. No one was zoning out or doodling either which was normally what Dean did during class. 

As he walked past Castiel who was shaking his head condescendingly, Dean flicked the other boy’s pencil off his desk. He sat down next to Benny and smirked as he watched him pick up his pencil. There wasn’t really a good reason to be an asshole to him except for his air of superiority. Just because Dean was different from the good little soldiers here didn’t make Castiel better than him. He didn’t have to be a dick. 

Dean looked around and saw that everyone had a notebook out and were dubiously copying everything that Henriksen said and wrote on the blackboard. He dragged an old notebook out of his backpack that he had brought to class at many schools for years, never really writing in it much, and a pen. 

Some of the stuff that Henriksen said Dean actually wrote down. He needed something to do so he figured he could be slightly productive. When he wasn’t writing anything down, he ripped little pieces of paper off a separate page from his notes and made them into little balls before launching them into Castiel’s hair who was sitting diagonally in front of him. Before long, his dark hair was dotted with several of them. 

Henriksen finished writing something on the board and turned around. Benny and Dean both had a hard time not laughing out loud at the ridiculous state of Castiel’s hair.

“Novak, do you mind telling me what’s in your hair?” Henriksen demanded with a stern look. 

Dean couldn’t see Castiel’s face but he could see his head tilt in confusion. His hands reached up and brushed through his hair which sent the bits of paper tumbling onto his desk. None of the other students laughed and Dean didn’t expect them to. Being in this prison-like school probably ruined their sense of humor. 

Dean tried to hide his snicker as a cough but it wasn’t quick enough. Castiel turned to glare at him with icy blue eyes as Dean tried and failed to keep a straight face. 

“Forget it,” Henriksen said. He kept teaching and Castiel turned back around. 

When the bell rang to dismiss the class, Dean and Benny made a beeline for the door. Outside it, Benny stopped Dean to ask where he was heading next to see if they had the same class. He had to pull his schedule out of the pocket of his uniform pants to check. As he was looking down, he was slammed into wall next to classroom door, hard. 

“Shit,” he cursed, not entirely surprised to find a pair of angry blue eyes belonging to Castiel directly in front of his face. Retaliation was to be expected. Dean didn’t really think he would take anything laying down. 

“You think you’re funny?” he said in a deep growl, weirdly close to Dean’s face. There were no mixed signals here. This time was definitely a fight.

“Most of the time, yeah,” Dean huffed, pushing Castiel off of him. They glared a moment before Benny intervened. 

“All right guys, come on. Dean, let’s go. Where’s your next class?” 

“I don’t know, I couldn’t check. I was manhandled against a wall,” Dean snapped, his eyes not leaving Castiel. Their classmates hovered awkwardly, probably not used to fighting in the hallways. For Dean, brawls used to be a regular occurrence. 

“I am your platoon leader. You should show me some respect,” Castiel snapped back.

“Sure, I’ll get right on that, Nowak,” Dean said, spitting his name like an insult and getting it wrong on purpose again. They each took a step forward and were only inches apart, both glaring with balled fists. Benny was about to step in when Henriksen exited his classroom and got in between them. 

“Knock it off, both of you. Winchester, respect Novak or…”

“I’ll get a demerit?” Dean guessed. “Fine.”

“All right. You want one? You got it, smartass. I have another problem with you today and you’ll be seeing Colonel Milton. You understand?” Henriksen explained.

“Whatever,” Dean replied, acting like he didn’t care. He turned to walk away. 

“Uh uh, no,” Henriksen said, grabbing Dean’s shoulder and turning him around. “Do you understand?

“Yes, sir,” Dean said through gritted teeth, figuring that was the correct response. 

“That’s more like it. Now get going before you’re late. Your next teacher might not be as nice as me.”

~

The next class was English with a teacher named Miss Moseley. Clearly this school was in the habit of hiring teachers that did not take shit from anyone. Dean didn’t even try with this lady. When she had her back turned to write on the board, she always turned back around when Dean thought about messing with Castiel, like she could read his mind. Mostly, he wasn’t in the mood for a possible visit back to that miserable cretin Zachariah so he sat quietly. They were reading a book Dean had never heard of so he just spaced out. 

Other classes passed in a blur. Some he had with Benny, some with Castiel and one at the end of the day with neither. Dean didn’t bother Castiel for the rest of the day. His strong reaction earlier was enough to make Dean back off, at least a little, which was probably his plan. 

After classes and before dinner was drill practice. Dean ran into Benny in their room and put on the required, according to Benny, sweatpants and t-shirt. When it got colder, they would wear the sweatshirt as well. Everything had the freaking school crest. Their clothes did and it was all over the school. It was a little much and so was the excessive amount of American flags everywhere. 

“So, what exactly do we do?” Dean asked, not in the least bit excited. To him, it sounded like boot camp not school. 

“We warm up, do some exercises. Nothing too bad. March around a little sometimes or drill,” Benny explained. 

“March? Seriously?” 

Benny shrugged. Dean didn’t know how long Benny had been stuck here but it seemed like too long to Dean if the guy shrugged off something so regimented and controlling. It was Dean’s worst nightmare. 

The entire junior and senior classes were outside. They talked in small groups and Dean followed Benny to talk to someone named Charlie, who was the other squad leader under Castiel’s platoon. Dean kind of recognized the redhead from some classes earlier but it was hard to tell. Everyone kind of blurred together. It didn’t matter if he knew these kids, they’d be a distant memory before too long. 

“Listen up!” came a yell. It was Raphael, the kid from last night that interrupted Dean and Castiel’s meeting. He looked just as rigid and scary as Dean remembered. 

“My company with me!” he yelled again. Dean followed Benny and Charlie as the group split into two. It made sense that Raphael was a company leader. The kid was a mean looking son of a bitch. 

“Everyone else, let’s go!” someone else yelled. 

“Who’s that?” Dean asked. The dark-haired guy was chiseled and handsome but also tough looking. 

“Michael, other company leader,” Benny said, under his breath. The people around them were quiet as they waited for further orders. 

“Oh. He as big of a dick as everyone else?” Dean asked. 

Benny just laughed as his answer.

Not good, Dean thought. His list of people to avoid continued to get longer by the hour. 

“Ladies and gentlemen, line up. We’re going for a run,” Raphael commanded. 

He led the pack of people as they filed into their specific squads behind their leaders. Castiel and a pretty red haired girl ran between the squad leaders and Raphael. 

“Damn, who is she?” Dean asked, definitely intrigued. If she was running by Castiel that meant she was the other platoon leader in their company. 

“Her name’s Anna but brother? She could destroy you,” Benny joked as they began to run as a unit. 

“I would not mind one bit,” Dean joked back, his eyes still on Anna. 

As a bisexual, he could very easily appreciate both of the attractive platoon leaders, even if he already knew that one was a dick. Maybe she wouldn’t be as uptight as her colleague, Castiel. The chances were slim but he could hope. 

Dean had always considered himself in decent shape, even with his occasional smoking. He had worked out with his father a few times, even though he didn’t want to, and had participated in gym class well enough. While he wasn’t dying at the end of their run, he was clearly more out of breath than any of the rest of them.

“You’ll get used to it,” Charlie said kindly. She hadn’t even broken a sweat.

“Great,” Dean breathed. Benny clapped him on the back.

On Raphael’s orders, his group split into their two platoons, all facing their platoon leader, with the four squad leaders making up the first row. Dean, since he had been standing close to Benny and Charlie from the run, ended up in the second row. 

“All right, you know what’s next. Each platoon leader, pick an exercise. Anna, go first,” Raphael instructed with his arms crossed as he stood in front of the group. Michael’s company was far away but seemed to be doing the same thing. 

Anna just had them do a few stretches, since they ran, and made them count. Loudly. 

“Castiel, go,” Raphael directed once they had stretched their legs thoroughly.

Castiel’s pick was jumping jacks. 

Dean wasn’t sure how long this whole exercising thing was going to go but he was already fed up with it. On number 10, Dean couldn’t help but mutter “fuck this.”

Castiel stopped his counting and froze on the spot. As he froze, so did the entire company. Dean included. Behind Dean, students exchanged concerned looks since nothing like this really ever happened. Since Dean only had Benny and Charlie separating himself from Castiel, he had very easily heard him speak. Castiel turned around, stormy eyes ablaze and angry.

“Winchester, drop and give me twenty,” Castiel decided, a challenging glint in his eyes.

“What?” Dean asked, not sure he had heard correctly.

“There’s no talking during exercises. Twenty. Push-ups,” Castiel articulated then narrowed his eyes. “You do know what those are, correct?”

“Yes,” Dean snapped. _Of fucking course I know what a damn push-up is, who does this fucker…_

“Then drop.”

“Make me,” Dean replied, sounding braver than he felt. Benny and Charlie had already sort of moved out of the way so that Castiel could talk to Dean. Benny had a face that was telling Dean to knock it off but it was too late. 

Castiel took a few steps forward and was in Dean’s personal space for what felt like the millionth time already. At the same time that Castiel placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder, his other hand landed a swift punch to the gut that knocked the wind out of him. Weak from the punch, it was easy for Castiel to shove Dean down to his knees with his other hand. 

“Twenty push-ups,” Castiel repeated, taking his hand off of Dean. “Now.”

Dean didn’t look up before he got in position and started. If he had hoped to embarrass Dean because he thought he couldn’t do a push-up or that many, he was sorely mistaken. Thanks to his ex-Marine father when he had punished Dean, he could do a perfect military grade push-up. He easily did the twenty and hopped to his feet with a smirk. Castiel’s stunned face was totally worth the ache in his stomach from the hit. Clearly, he didn’t think Dean could do a push-up, let alone twenty. Castiel’s face turned back to stone and he strode back to his place up front. 

_Asshole_ , Dean thought at Novak’s retreating back but he didn’t say anything out loud. He didn’t really want another reason for Castiel to come back and punch him again.

Castiel walked back to his spot up front and continued to count the jumping jacks and the company, Dean included, followed him. 

_What a great first day_ , Dean couldn’t help but think bitterly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	3. Cold As Ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You want paradise, someday day you'll pay the price. I know, I've seen it before it happens all the time. Closing the door, you leave the world behind." Cold As Ice, Foreigner

“How’s your stomach, brother?” Benny asked when the two of them were back in their room at their desks. After they had eaten dinner with everyone else, it was time for studying and homework in their rooms. Teachers occasionally walked through to look through the open doors to make sure the students were actually working. 

“Hurts like a bitch. Remind me not to piss off the nerd,” Dean answered. 

Despite the slight pain from Castiel’s punch, he still couldn’t find it in himself to regret what he had done. He wasn’t a fan of mindlessly dressing the same and all doing the same thing like the exercises outside. It was a little shocking that Castiel could punch like that, though. He wasn’t as scrawny as Dean had originally thought. 

Instead of doing the reading that Henriksen assigned for history class, Dean’s mind wandered without him meaning it to. Castiel had gotten under his skin in less than a day and Dean didn’t entirely know why. Sure, he was attractive and Dean knew that right away. That was one of the first thoughts Dean had about him. But he was annoying and uptight. Despite that, Dean couldn’t help but wonder what if Castiel had shoved him against the wall to make out with him instead of yell at him? What if when Castiel had him on his knees he was about to do something else entirely different than push-ups?

Two sharp knocks thankfully derailed his train of thought.

“Focus, Winchester. I’ll make sure to ask you questions first tomorrow,” Henriksen said at the door before walking away. 

Dean shook his head and kept reading. Where had all that come from? He couldn’t waste time thinking about Castiel Novak. He shouldn’t think about him like that, he barely knew him. Besides the fact that the guy hated him, there was no guarantee he was into dudes. Particularly not Dean. Why would he be? No one had ever wanted him to be anything other than a warm mouth and usually Dean was fine with that. He had never been into the whole relationships thing and still wasn’t. But now, maybe this guy wanted to fool around…maybe some angry sex…

 _No_ , Dean snapped at himself. _What would Dad say? You know he’d knock you on your ass. Just keep reading._

Just because Dean tried to accept himself didn’t mean that everyone did. 

If his mind went to Castiel again, Dean either forced himself to read or to think about Anna, the other hot platoon leader. Any other thoughts about messy brown hair and blue eyes were saved for Dean’s dreams later that night whether he wanted to dream about him or not. 

~

The rest of the week flew by without much incident. Dean was a good little soldier like everyone else and probably would have made his father proud, which wasn’t a comforting thought. Sure, he always listened to him but he kind of lost respect for John when he stuck him in military school. 

Dean didn’t bother Castiel and he tried not to think about him much either. He hung out with Benny and occasionally Charlie as well. He got his homework done, made his bed each morning and exercised before dinner with everyone else. It was hard to stomach the routine but it was easier to go with the flow even though it went against every bone in Dean’s body. He still wanted to get kicked out but there was one plus to obedience. The reward for behaving was a bit of freedom. 

Saturday came and those in good standing could head into town. Dean was glad he only had the one demerit. Since he had served it by peeling potatoes, he was cleared to go. It was a ridiculously military thing to assign as punishment but Dean only laughed up until he had to do it. Then it wasn’t as funny. 

Benny and he dressed in regular clothing and a plaid flannel and jeans never felt better to Dean. After a week of uniforms and matching sweats, being able to wear what he wanted was inexplicably pleasing. There was no way he could last too much longer like this. His dad had better come and get him soon. 

“Are there payphones around?” Dean asked Benny. They walked with everyone else towards the closest part of Lawrence, which was unfortunately the opposite side of town than where Dean was from. Walking all the way home was out of the question and they weren’t allowed to travel too far anyways.

“Payphones? You don’t have a cell?” Benny asked, smiling a little. 

“John took it,” Dean shrugged. John had given Dean a cell phone for emergencies but took it back before he shipped Dean off. 

“Your father?”

“Yes,” Dean said shortly. “What’s there to do over here?”

Since he never got over to this side of Lawrence, Benny described some of the stores and the diner and Dean was grateful for the change in subject. He decided to find a payphone on his own at some point. There was someone he needed to call. 

They walked into the first store and wandered around a while. They passed several classmates on the street, including Charlie who came bounding up to them. After saying hi, the three of them headed back the way Charlie came since she wanted to show Benny something. 

“I’ll be right back,” Dean said to the two of them when he caught sight of a payphone that hopefully still worked. “I’ll meet you at the diner.”

Benny and Charlie walked into a little art store and Dean crossed the street to make a call. He carefully used his thumb and forefinger to gingerly pick up the presumably germ-covered phone. After he dug out some quarters from his pockets, he punched the numbers for his home phone number using a knuckle, not his fingertips. 

“Hello?” a boy answered.

“Sammy?” Dean asked, his face breaking into a smile. 

“Dean!” the voice, Sammy, exclaimed. “How are you? Are you in the Army now? Can I visit? Can you visit? I miss you!”

“Whoa, easy buddy. Good, no, no, maybe, miss you too!” Dean answered rapid fire. He had missed his little brother like nobody’s business. Sam was always so exuberant and now was no exception.

“What’s it like?” Sam wanted to know.

“Kind of sucks but not all the time,” Dean answered honestly. For a twelve year old, the kid was smart and always knew when Dean was lying. He stopped trying to a long time ago. 

“You still wear the necklace I got you? Uncle Bobby said it will protect you,” the younger Winchester said.

“Never take it off,” Dean said. His free hand immediately went to the tiny gold idol face on a black cord he wore around his neck. Even under his uniform and everything else, he hadn’t taken it off since Sam had gotten it for him. It was his favorite present ever. 

There was a pause before Dean asked, “How’s Dad?”

“The usual. I mostly stay in my room when I’m home and do homework. Or I go hang out with Jess.”

“Good. Wait, who’s Jess?” Dean teased gently. 

“Just a friend,” Sam responded, but just a little defensively. 

“Sure,” Dean joked, dragging the word out. There was a loud bang in the background like the sound of a door slamming open.

“Crap, Dad’s home. Call me again soon, okay?” Sam said in a hurry before he hung up. 

Dean hated that he couldn’t be there to help Sam deal with their father. It shouldn’t have been either of their problems but without them, John would have died from any number of alcohol related accidents over the years. As much as he sucked as a guardian, he still was one and beat foster care by a slim margin. If Dean still had breath in his body, his sweet little brother would never end up there.

“Just back off, all right?” 

Dean heard someone up the street and turned to look and saw three boys not far ahead. Michael seemed to be the one who spoke. If Dean were to hazard a guess, the kid Michael scolded had been bothering Castiel until Michael had stepped in. The kid Dean didn’t know, clad all in black, sauntered down the street and passed Dean with a sneer but didn’t say anything. Dean must have seen him before but he was probably in Michael’s company so it was hard to tell. Everyone still kind of blurred together in his mind. 

“Look, Castiel, we can’t always look out for you, okay? For goodness sake, you’re a higher rank than Crowley. Act like it!” Michael said, his voice escalating as he scolded. He stormed off in the opposite direction that Crowley had gone. 

Castiel stood by himself on the sidewalk, wearing an LMA T-shirt and jeans. It was a little weird to see him out of his green uniform or sweats. Dean didn’t really care for Michael’s attitude towards him and sort of felt bad that Castiel was alone even if he wasn’t his biggest fan. Against his better judgment, he decided to walk over and try to talk to him. 

“Hey man, you okay?” Dean asked. Castiel looked up, slightly startled, and didn’t look too happy to see who it was.

“I’m fine,” Cas said with bite, not meeting Dean’s eyes. 

“You sure? Seems like both of those dicks were giving you problems,” Dean observed.

“Crowley was, yes. Michael was just looking out for me.”

“Oh, is that what you’d call it?” Dean said, trying not to laugh. It did not seem like that at all.

“Yes. He’s my cousin and he was protecting me,” Cas said, sounding a little annoyed.

“Right,” Dean said sarcastically. 

“Why do you care Dean?” Cas said with an exasperated sigh. Dean paused for a moment since Castiel had never called him by his first name and it was weird. 

“I don’t, I was just trying to help,” Dean said, putting his hands up defensively.

“I don’t need your help,” Castiel snapped.

“No, your douchebag of a cousin has that covered.”

“My family is none of your business.”

“Fine,” Dean snapped, realizing Castiel was being too stubborn. This was not worth his time.

“Fine,” Cas spat. 

The two walked opposite ways down the street. Dean headed towards the diner where Benny, Charlie and hopefully a cheeseburger would be waiting. Each step slapped the pavement, mirroring Dean’s frustration. Why should he care if someone was a dick to Castiel? It wasn’t his problem. 

 

The diner was crowded but he found Benny and Charlie fairly easily. A lot of people in there were students from the academy enjoying some decent food for once. As Dean had hoped, there was a cheeseburger waiting for him. It looked like their food had arrived right before Dean and he slid into the booth next to Charlie and across from Benny. Dean was grateful his new found friends remembered him saying how much he wanted a good burger on the walk into town. 

“Oh my God, finally. A good burger,” Dean said, staring intently at his burger as he picked it up and bit into it. It was the perfect thing to clear his mind. 

“You two need a room?” Charlie joked. He bumped his shoulder against hers as he chewed. 

“You find a payphone okay?” Benny asked. Dean nodded. “Long call?”

“Ran into Castiel,” Dean said between bites, explaining what took so long.

“You didn’t get into a fight did you?” Charlie guessed from the previous encounter during exercises on Monday. 

“Not this time. We talked, no big deal,” Dean said, downplaying the situation. Castiel and his family was not his problem. Especially not when this burger was in front of him. 

The trio continued to eat and chat about anything and everything. Dean learned that Charlie loved a lot of the same nerdy things he did and that Benny was originally from Louisiana. 

“Where are you from?” Benny asked, an innocent question. 

“Lawrence,” Dean answered. 

“Oh, no shit? You’re close, like me. You could visit home, easily,” Charlie said. She sipped her milkshake, eyes on Dean. This was not where Dean wanted this conversation to go. 

“Yeah,” Dean said, looking down and finishing off his fries. 

“You say that like you don’t want to go home,” Benny noticed. 

“It’s not that, I do. Kind of,” Dean said, thinking about Sam. But then he thought about his dad and then really did not want to go home. “Long story.”

“We’ve got time!” Charlie said cheerfully. 

Dean liked these two, he did, but he wasn’t ready to tell people he had known for less than a week his life story and open the can of worms that was John Winchester. There was no need for honesty to scare his only two friends off. If he could put off any conversation about home, he would. 

Benny looked like he was going to agree with Charlie and press further but the check came. Dean scooped it up. 

“I got it,” Dean said, “I swiped my dad’s Visa before he dumped me here.”

It was technically his dad’s but the name wasn’t his. He did apply for it, though, with a fake name since he couldn’t be bothered to hold down a real job too long. Dean was sure his father wouldn’t miss this one. Charlie and Benny didn’t question a free meal. 

They exited the diner back onto the street. Dean was thankful that all talk of family and home was forgotten, for the time being. It was nice just hanging out with friends. As much as he loved Sam, chatting with people his own age was refreshing. 

As they walked, Dean paused because he saw a record store on the other side of the street and his face lit up. 

“Oh, come on. We have got to go in there!” he exclaimed, a huge grin on his face. Benny and Charlie loved music too and were all for it. 

Once they walked inside, Dean looked around to soak it all in. Among all of the records and band memorabilia was Castiel. He was with someone Dean didn’t recognize but he probably was another student. Dean considered how their interaction went earlier and decided to ignore him. There was no need to start anything. 

Dean, Benny and Charlie walked around to admire all that the little store had. It was a surprisingly broad array. As much as Dean appreciated music and the classic record, he had to admit that having all of his favorites on his iPod was much more convenient. He didn’t even own a record player if he wanted to buy anything but looking was still fun. Better than being stuck inside doing homework or doing drill. 

“I don’t know who that is, Gabriel,” Castiel said, sounding bored. Dean had wandered around and had inadvertently ended up in the same aisle as him, distracted by all the music.

“What?” the other kid, who Dean guessed was Gabriel, said. “They’re awesome!” 

Dean was close enough to see that the band that Castiel meant was Blue Oyster Cult. He couldn’t help but laugh softly to himself at the fact that Castiel didn’t know who they were. He didn’t seem like the type to know who many bands that Dean liked were. 

“Something funny?” Castiel asked, turning to Dean. He was a little taken aback since he had hoped that Castiel didn’t hear him but it seemed like he had a knack for that. 

“What? No,” Dean answered. He honestly wasn’t looking to start something out in public. In class or during drill was different. 

“You got a problem?” Gabriel asked, stepping towards Dean. He was a step in front of Castiel but not blocking him from Dean’s view.

“This another one of your protective cousins?” Dean assumed, ignoring Gabriel and looking past him at Castiel.

“No,” Castiel replied, “my brother.”

“You get your family to fight all your battles for you?” Dean accused, ignoring his previous idea to leave Castiel alone. The kid somehow managed to push all of Dean’s buttons without doing much. 

“I think I’ve proven I can handle myself just fine,” Castiel said, stepping even with Gabriel to stare Dean down. 

Dean remembered Castiel cornering him after his first class and knocking him down during outside exercises the same day. Yes, Castiel had proven he could take care of himself. 

Dean should have walked away but he never knew when to quit and as his father and many teachers had pointed out in the past, he always had to have the last word. They had also pointed out that his attitude would get him on the wrong side of the wrong person someday. 

“Well, we’ve never had a fair fight Nowak,” Dean mentioned, Castiel’s eyes narrowing, “You’ve got the authority and Henriksen to back you up. Without your power, you’re basically just a baby in a uniform.”

Castiel pulled back his arm. His hand had tightened into a fist as Dean talked and he reared back to punch. Gabriel grabbed his arm to stop him.

“Come on. He’s not worth it, let’s go,” Gabriel diffused. 

With a final glare, Castiel pulled his arm from his brother’s grasp and stormed out of the store. Gabriel followed, looking kind of confused. Clearly, he didn’t know the short but heated history between the two of them. 

Dean busied himself by looking at the records but wasn’t really seeing them. How could he and Castiel hate each other so much? They hadn’t even known each other for a week and already had gotten into so many fights. Something about the guy just made Dean see red. He was so caught up in being mad and blindly flipping through records he didn’t hear Benny and Charlie walk up. 

“Hey, what happened?” Charlie asked. 

“You all right, brother?” Benny asked at almost the same time. 

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” Dean lied. “Nothing happened.”

Dean looked back at the records and didn’t notice Charlie and Benny share a look behind him. The two of them couldn’t figure out what the deal was between their friend and the platoon leader but it was certainly confusing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	4. Fight Fire With Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "That's why I fight fire with fire, oh I'm burning inside and my heart is a-cryin'. Fire with fire, I don't want to lose this flamin' desire." Fight Fire With Fire, Kansas

The rest of September into October was more of the same at the military academy. Dean piled up demerits by showing up late to class or not doing his homework and his punishments would vary. Normally, the teachers wouldn’t have to be this creative with their ideas but there was no other student that got into as much trouble as Dean Winchester. Many a conversation was had between teachers in an attempt to see what could work. They tried new things to get Dean to behave but it wasn’t working yet. He already had to peel more potatoes, write lines, do more homework and file papers to no avail. 

Henriksen dealt with him the most. So far, Dean hadn’t gotten his bed to perfection like Benny did regularly. Dean would do every corner perfect but one or smooth out all but one wrinkle in his blanket or the pillow would be at the foot of the bed. It was getting harder and harder for Dean not to laugh while Henriksen almost blew his lid at the “so close” state of his bed every morning. The rest of the room didn’t matter as much which was good since his clothes were stacked on top of his dresser. Dean had never put them away since he wanted to leave at a moment’s notice when his dad came to get him.

Besides messing with the teachers, Dean continued to annoy Castiel. The kid still pissed him off. The “I’m better than you attitude” was just the tip of the iceberg. Novak was the biggest kiss ass Dean had ever seen and he always gave Dean a smug look when he got an answer right in class. Dean would roll his eyes to hide the fact that he wanted to smack that look off of him. 

Castiel always listened to the teachers while Dean spaced out so he would take his backpack and flip it inside out or continue to throw paper into his messy hair. In the cafeteria, which Dean refused to call a mess hall, he attempted to throw pieces of napkin into Castiel’s water. The one time he succeeded, Castiel calmly got up and refilled it so Dean stopped doing that. There hadn’t been a reaction quite like the first day in the hallway. It was mostly calm indifference from Castiel during classes. 

The retaliation came during exercises where he made Dean’s life hell. This was where Castiel had authority and used it. About every other day, Dean made some smartass comment that Castiel heard and consequently made him do push-ups. 

It was October and Dean had officially been at the academy for a month when things escalated. 

All the students were outside for exercises like normal. It was a little cooler out so some students had opted to wear the sweatshirt but Dean didn’t despite the slight chill. The runs were getting easier for Dean and he was almost faster than Benny. 

Post-run, Anna led stretches. Castiel picked jumping jacks for his exercise. He had chosen different things every once in a while but this was the third day in a row he picked the mundane task. 

“Dude, fucking pick something else,” Dean complained. He didn’t bother keeping it under his breath anymore since Castiel seemed to always hear him anyways. 

In almost regular fashion, Castiel turned to tell Dean how many push-ups that would cost him. Today was fifty push-ups since the number had been increasing every time. Castiel’s arrogant face was almost enough for Dean to punch him but he kept his cool. He dropped and did them without another word. 

After they were completely done as a company with exercises, everyone was walking towards their barracks including Benny and Charlie, but Castiel tried to make Dean stay to run laps. 

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” Dean shouted indignantly. “I’m not doing that.”

“I am sick of having to make you do push-ups,” Castiel snapped. 

“Yeah? I’m sick of doing them!” Dean yelled. “No one else has to!”

“You’re the only one who talks,” Castiel pointed out. “They’re supposed to make you shut up but you seem to do the exact opposite.”

Dean couldn’t argue with that. He always talked because it always got a reaction from the platoon leader. Now was no exception but this was too much. 

Dean was tired. It had been a long day of classes with teachers who busted him left and right for zoning out and not paying attention all before these stupid exercises. On top of that, Castiel was giving him shit and he wasn’t in the mood so he turned to walk away.

Castiel grabbed his shoulder and turned him around, leaving his hand. They stood about the same height, glaring at each other. Dean noticed how amazing Castiel’s eyes were before he remembered he was pissed and that didn’t change just because the jackass was hot.

“Let me go,” Dean said, low and threateningly. “I’m not running your damn laps.”

“Yes, you are.”

Castiel still hadn’t let go of Dean’s arm and tried to steer him towards the track in the school’s stadium. Dean shrugged him off and pushed him away with both hands against his chest.

As Castiel tried to grab his arm again, Dean swung with his opposite arm without thinking and his hand connected solidly with Castiel’s face, knocking him on his ass. The hit seemed to surprise them both. To his credit, he jumped back up quickly. Before Dean could react, Castiel charged at him. He tackled him to the ground and was on top of Dean before he connected two punches to Dean’s face. Then, Dean gathered himself and rolled them over. Another punch smashed into Castiel’s nose and Dean was going to go again when he was pulled off of Castiel by the back of his shirt.

“Winchester, knock it off!” Henriksen yelled, holding Dean back. 

Dean spat blood on the grass near Castiel who was still on the ground, clutching his nose. Dean could see a bit of blood on Castiel’s hands and almost felt bad before he tasted his own blood in his mouth. The fight was long overdue and they had each held their own. Henriksen dragged Dean to Zachariah’s office, not once letting up on his iron tight grip on Dean’s arm. 

“I caught this one fighting, sir,” Henriksen explained, shoving Dean into the little room.

“Thank you. I’ll take it from here,” Zachariah said, not looking up from his papers. “Sit down.” 

Henriksen nodded and left the room as Dean sat. Several minutes of silence passed. Dean tried to ignore the throbbing in his face. Damn, that nerd could punch. Their constant fighting still didn’t make a lot of sense to Dean but he just couldn’t stay away. He always had to take another step, push a little further, until something like this happened. 

“Winchester,” Zachariah said suddenly, looking up and startling Dean a little. “Who were you fighting?”

“Castiel Novak,” Dean admitted, “sir.”

“Your platoon leader,” Zachariah said flatly. Dean nodded. 

Zachariah observed Dean’s face and the damage with a small, smug smile. Dean always figured that this creep would be happy if Dean got hurt or in trouble and it looked like he was right.

“Now, I know why you’re here,” he continued. 

“For fighting?” Dean guessed. He heard Henriksen say so when he dropped Dean off. 

“Not why you’re in my office right now. Why you’re at Lawrence Military Academy. Your father explained it to me,” Zachariah said. Dean swallowed nervously. If this is what Zachariah wanted to talk about he couldn’t really stop him but Dean had done pretty well at suppressing the memory of the whole ordeal.

“He wants me to fix you, his words not mine. He told me he saw you with another boy doing things he… well, he wasn’t happy, was he?” Zachariah continued. Dean looked down. “He said you could rot here until you cut that shit out, as he so elegantly put it. As much as I disapprove of that nonsense, that isn’t necessarily my business since it wasn’t here but your lack of respect is my concern. It doesn’t seem like you are learning your lesson here, kid.” 

Dean looked up and clenched his jaw, steeled for the lecture. It wasn’t the first time he would be lectured about his behavior. Fighting was somewhat of a Dean Winchester specialty. 

“Your father also explained how much you love your brother. You probably want to visit him, correct?” Zachariah asked, nailing it on the head. 

Dean nodded. As much as he hated this guy, more so now that he knew what his dad saw and talking about his brother, he did really want to see Sam. 

“Good. Now, you are going to behave in this school or you won’t be allowed to visit, got it?” Dean nodded again. “Since you were fighting, you will not be allowed into town this weekend. But, the following weekend, you will be allowed home to see your brother if you behave until then.”

“Yes sir,” Dean agreed enthusiastically. He would do almost anything to see Sammy.

“That means no more fighting. Also, doing your homework and listening to the teachers. They’ve been telling me the most interesting stories about your general disobedience. You also must behave during exercises. I don’t even want to hear about you forgetting to say ‘thank you’ to the lunch lady, got it?”

“Yes sir,” Dean said honestly. If he could see Sam and know he was okay, this fight wouldn’t matter and neither would this stupid school. 

“You can go,” Zachariah dismissed. 

“Wait,” Dean said as he stood, “what about Castiel?”

“What do you mean?” 

“Is he in trouble?” 

“No, why would he be? You started the fight, correct?” 

Dean opened his mouth to shoot something rude back but thought of Sam and decided not to. He had to behave, starting now.

“Yes, sir,” Dean agreed one more time. Zachariah smiled, all smug and condescending, knowing that Dean was already bending to his will. 

He left the office, seething. Sure, he started the fight but Zachariah didn’t know that. Neither Henriksen nor Dean had told him and he sure the hell wasn’t there. Of course, Castiel would get the benefit of the doubt as a platoon leader. Dean was just a problem Zachariah needed to fix. Dean spent the walk back to his room pissed off but thought about visiting Sam to calm down again. 

 

Once he walked into his room, he was immediately enveloped in a tight hug.

“Charlie, need to breathe,” he wheezed. 

“Sorry,” she said, backing off. “We didn’t know what happened to you!” 

She gasped at the sight of his face and Benny raised his eyebrows from his bed where he sat. 

“What the hell?” Benny asked. 

“Castiel,” Dean shrugged it off. He figured his face was in quite a state. Those two punches, one to the jaw and one to the cheek, probably looked as bad as they felt. At least the taste of blood was pretty much gone. 

“Seriously? What is it with you two?” Charlie said. 

Dean shrugged again. He honestly didn’t know. Any time the guy opened his mouth, Dean wanted to punch him. Now, he had finally done it but somehow it didn’t feel very satisfying like he thought it might. 

Charlie left for homework hours in her room after a goodbye when Henriksen came by. 

“Here,” Benny said, handing Dean a sandwich. He sat as his desk and Dean did the same. 

“Swipe it at dinner?” Dean asked with a smile. Benny nodded. “Thanks, man.” 

The two quietly worked on homework. Dean was grateful for the distraction. He didn’t want to think about his fight with Castiel. If he did, then he would have to admit to himself that he liked Castiel on top of him, minus the punching part. There was no reason he should like the guy at all since he was so infuriating but he couldn’t help it. How could he want to fight him and kiss him at the same damn time? Something must be wrong with me, Dean thought before reminding himself Castiel was just another guy and nothing special. And his father….

 _Shut up_ , Dean silenced his thoughts. As always, he shoved his feelings far away and just focused on what was in front of him. Unfortunately it was homework but that was better than thinking of Castiel and his stupid blue eyes and strong hands and...

Dean ground his teeth and attacked his history assignment. 

 

The rest of the week proved to be a significant case of whiplash for the teachers at LMA. The Dean Winchester who had been such a headache for all of them proved to be a model student. Henriksen found his bed made perfectly and received a “thank you sir” after he said it looked good. He turned in every homework assignment, was on time to class and didn’t talk back at all. 

Henriksen couldn’t help but comment during one of his classes when Dean raised his hand and got another question correct.

“Winchester, I don’t know what’s gotten into you but keep it up.” He continued to teach and 

Dean tried to shrug it off but it felt good. Teachers usually weren’t nice to him, ever, and Henriksen especially had been a dick since he arrived, even if Dean deserved most of it.

When Benny asked him about his behavior, he just said it would all be worth it. Benny shrugged and didn’t press anymore. He was the best friend Dean had ever had and they respected each other’s privacy. 

Both his and Castiel’s faces were healing day by day. To keep his promise to Zachariah, Dean didn’t even talk to Castiel. Dean resisted the urge to throw back the same grins Cas threw when he got a question right. If he avoided him, he wouldn’t get in trouble since that was all Castiel seemed to be. Whenever they interacted, it was trouble. He kept his mouth shut during class and during exercises. His arms definitely enjoyed the break from the push-ups. Other members of the company gave Dean confused looked looks since they had grown somewhat accustomed to a break from working out while Dean did his push-ups. 

It was the Saturday where Dean wouldn’t be allowed off campus. Dean’s teacher, Missouri Moseley, made sure that he, and the couple other kids who this applied to, would stay put.

“Benny, can I borrow your phone before you go?” Dean asked before he and Charlie left. 

“Sure,” he agreed. 

Dean grabbed the cell phone and stepped into the hallway to call home. 

“Hello?” a gruff voice answered. 

“John?” Dean asked, shocked his father was home and coherent. He honestly was so shocked that he accidentally used his father’s name since he usually called him dad. He only called him John when he talked about him, not to him.

“Who’s this?”

“Dean.”

“Son, why are you calling?”

“I wanted to talk to Sam,” Dean explained. John never answered the phone and it was new to Dean. And confusing. The guy almost sounded sober but probably should have been at work. 

“All right,” John conceded.

There was some shuffling and muffled talking until Sam came to the phone. 

“Dean?” Sam asked.

“Hey Sammy!” Dean greeted. 

“What’s up?” 

“I can’t use the payphone in town because I can’t leave campus today, uh… too much to do. I think I can come home and visit next weekend!”

“Yay!” Sam yelled so loud Dean had to move Benny’s cell away from his face but smiled anyways. “You’re just busy right, not in trouble?”

“I’m fine,” Dean lied and hoped it would work, “What’s up with dad?”

“I don’t know. He’s having a pretty good day,” Sam said, a little unsure.

“Weird. Everything else okay? How’s your friend Jess?”

“All good and she’s great!”

“I’m glad. I have to go but I’ll see you soon, man.”

“Bye Dean!”

“See ya Sam.”

Dean walked back into his room and handed the phone back to Benny. He and Charlie were getting ready to go into town. Even though he was missing out on going into town, it wouldn’t really matter. Next weekend, he could go home and see Sam. 

“Thanks, man. You guys go have fun,” Dean said.

“We’ll bring you a cheeseburger,” Charlie said, clapping a hand on his shoulder as she walked out. 

The two left and Dean lay on his bed with the door cracked half open for Missouri to make sure he didn’t sneak off campus. He could ask to go the cafeteria or library but he wasn’t interested in either.

After he hooked up his iPod loudly to Benny’s speakers, he picked up a baseball of Benny’s and threw it up in the air and caught it. He felt like Steve McQueen in The Great Escape. Mostly because of the ball but it felt a little like solitary confinement. 

Without anything else to do, he continued to do that as he waited for Benny and Charlie to come back. His face had healed nicely and he didn’t even think about Castiel. At all. Well, barely. It might have been Dean’s imagination but Castiel seemed to have been looking at Dean in a very curious way in their classes. He must have been confused since Dean had done a complete 180 since their fight. Instead of almost daily arguing, they didn’t interact at all. That was a probably a relief to him. No fighting surely made his life easier as a platoon leader. 

Dean turned the music up and closed his eyes, holding the baseball to his chest. He focused on the music and almost didn’t hear the knock on his door. 

Without looking, he paused the music and sat up. He looked and saw Castiel. It was odd that he wasn’t in town with everyone else but that wasn’t Dean’s business.

“Dean, I was…”

“Fine, I’ll turn it down. I didn’t know anyone else was here,” Dean responded, hoping it sounded like a dismissal. He repeated to himself to be nice, behave, think of Sam… 

“Thank you,” Castiel said. 

He paused and looked like he wanted to say something else but didn’t. He left the room. Dean could hear Castiel open and close his own door. He hit play on the music and turned it down. Usually Castiel would be up in his face about the loud music. The interaction was civil but tense and left Dean more than a little puzzled. 

 

Benny and Charlie came back into the room with a bang and woke Dean up. He hadn’t realized he had fallen asleep. 

“Hey man, here’s your burger,” Benny said, throwing it on his chest. Dean started in on it immediately, mumbling a grateful thanks as he chewed. 

“We got something else, too,” Charlie said, shutting the door. She pulled a bottle of what looked like cheap vodka out of her oversize bag. 

“Oh shit. How?” Dean asked, almost choking on his burger. That was not what he was expecting. Sure, these two weren’t uptight like Castiel but this shocked him a little. 

“Older guy, gave him a good tip,” Benny shrugged. 

“Sweet. We drinking it tonight?” Dean asked. They nodded. “Where?”

“Probably just here. I’ll sneak over after lights out,” Charlie said. 

“But we have to be pretty careful. Getting caught puts us in deep shit,” Benny explained, “and I do not want that.”

Dean was well aware that having booze could get them all kicked out. As much he wanted to leave the school, he was sure his friends didn’t share the sentiment. At least Benny didn’t. Dean was fine with dealing with any consequences from Henriksen or Milton but if he did get kicked out, he would have to deal with his father. It wouldn’t be the first time he disappointed John and it surely wouldn’t be the last. 

“Can’t wait. Anyone else you want to invite over?” Dean smiled. 

“Maybe Garth?” Charlie suggested. He was a squad leader under Anna in their company. Dean thought he was a little odd but a good guy. Dean and Benny agreed. 

It would be fun to kick back a little after dealing with this place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	5. Dazed and Confused

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Been dazed and confused for so long it's not true. Wanted a woman, never bargained for you." Dazed and Confused, Led Zeppelin.

Later that night, Benny and Dean snuck Charlie and Garth into their room. The four of them sat on the floor between the two beds after they shut and locked the door. There were strict rules in place about lights out and staying in your own room but they took a chance anyways. 

“Have any of you ever actually been drunk before?” Garth asked. He tentatively took a slow pull, wincing as the vodka went down. He passed the bottle to Charlie.

“I have,” Dean said, not meeting anyone’s eyes. He looked up at their shocked faces. “What? Me and a girl snuck into my dad’s liquor cabinet over the summer.”

It wasn’t a lie. There had been a girl named Rhonda but it didn’t matter. It felt like a lifetime ago. She was before anything his father looked down upon. Although if he knew what really happened with Rhonda… 

He grabbed the bottle from Charlie and took a generous gulp, an unpleasant burn muting his memories. He passed it on. Normally, he was a whiskey guy but this would have to do.

They talked about the week and school and continued to drink. After the third pass, Dean was feeling pretty good. Garth was probably the biggest lightweight Dean would ever see. 

“Where are you from again, Dean?” Garth asked, already a slight slur to his words. 

“Lawrence,” Dean said, the new subject making him itch for the bottle again. 

“Oh, cool,” Garth said. “You been home since you got here?”

“Uh no,” Dean said, accepting the bottle and drinking. 

“Why not?” Garth wondered. 

“Kind of a long story, man,” Dean answered, trying to get them to drop the subject. Garth looked to Benny who subtly shook his head but Dean noticed it and was thankful when Garth started talking about something else. 

“How’s your face?” Charlie asked after a while. Dean’s hand reached up to touch the mostly faded bruise on his jaw and shrugged her concern off. He and Novak had both been dinged up pretty badly but nothing Dean wasn’t used to. 

“What happened?” Garth asked. 

“Castiel. He tried to make me run laps and I didn’t want to,” Dean explained. He took a fifth drink. The bottle was getting low and they all agreed to pause for a little. “He’s a dick.”

“I mean, you have to understand where he’s coming from, you know?” Garth pointed out, clearly relaxed from the alcohol. 

“What do you mean?” Dean said honestly. 

There wasn’t much he really knew about the guy and he wasn’t sure he wanted to talk about him when he had been drinking. What if he said something stupid? 

“He’s under a lot of pressure,” Benny started, “This place is practically run by his family. You know Zachariah? He’s his uncle.”

“No shit?” Dean said. He never would have guessed that. Zachariah as an uncle probably sucked something awful. 

“No shit,” Benny continued, “Michael is his cousin, so is Lucifer. They’re twins. Raphael is their younger brother.”

“Raphael?” Dean asked, smiling. The kid certainly was lacking in family resemblance.

“Adopted,” Benny laughed.

Dean soaked all of that in. No matter where Castiel turned, his family was on his ass. It kind of changed how Dean saw Castiel. He wasn’t a kiss-ass, rule-follower for no reason. He probably had no choice. It explained so much. Perhaps there was something more substantial under the robot Castiel acted like. Maybe Dean wouldn’t mind finding out more about the guy.

“What about your family?” Garth asked. The booze had warmed Dean up a little and he was really feeling comfortable with his friends so he shared the bare minimum. 

“Younger brother, love him. Father’s a drinker,” Dean said uncomfortably, “that’s pretty much it.”

There wasn’t enough alcohol to get Dean to talk about his mother, right here or probably in the world. He also wasn’t too happy mentioning his father. 

Everyone paused in a buzzed bliss. Charlie asked Garth something Dean didn’t catch. Thinking about his family made Dean slightly uneasy and he wanted to go outside to breathe. He stood carefully and the booze hit him all at once. He closed his eyes and took a shaky breath then shrugged on his father’s jacket with his smokes. 

“I’m good,” he grinned stupidly at his friends’ concerned faces, “I’ll be right back.”

“Be careful,” Charlie cautioned. It was past lights out but Dean didn’t care. He just needed a moment by himself.

 

Dean walked outside to his usual smoking spot next to the dorm building and leaned against the wall. He lit a cigarette and closed his eyes, feeling the comforting rush of nicotine go right to his head. It wasn’t a great idea to try to avoid his problems with alcohol or cigarettes but he learned from the best and he was his father’s son. 

“Dean,” a voice to his right said. The alcohol had slowed his reaction time so he wasn’t startled. He recognized that the voice belonged to Castiel but couldn’t see him very well, just a shadow. 

“I swear, I am not in the fucking mood for you to tell me to not smoke,” Dean sighed before puffing again. Thinking about his family combined with the alcohol increased his need for nicotine and decreased his patience. He really didn’t want to fight.

“I wasn’t going to,” Cas said defensively.

“Liar,” Dean accused without any bite to his voice. 

“You really shouldn’t smoke though,” Cas pointed out. “It’s bad for you.”

“What the fuck do you care? You hate me,” Dean replied. “All we do is fight.”

“We do fight but I think we share the blame for it,” Cas answered.

“Sure,” Dean scoffed. There might have been some truth to that.

There was a tense silence. Dean almost told Cas to go away but found he didn’t want him to leave.

“No, I don’t,” Cas said. “Hate you, that is.”

“What?” Dean asked, confused. 

He didn’t know much about Castiel but he was pretty sure the guy hated him. This was a surprise. 

“Well, sure you’re infuriating and stubborn. But I don’t hate you.” 

Cas had walked close enough that Dean could see him smile under the one dim light on the side of building. He smiled back. They had never smiled at each other but Dean liked it already more than fighting. It was also interesting that Castiel didn’t hate him. He would have bet money that he did. Whatever was happening between them at the moment was more than a little odd to Dean. He felt like they should be arguing. 

“Aren’t we supposed to be inside this late Mr. Platoon Leader?” Dean joked and switched the topic.

“We are. That’s why I followed you when you left your room.”

“Shit. Am I in trouble?” Dean asked, turning his head. Leaning on the wall made Dean a little shorter than Castiel and he looked up at him through his long lashes. The alcohol must have made him sound more flirtatious than he meant it because Castiel looked more than a little perplexed. 

“I…no. You’re not,” Castiel said, slightly flustered.

Dean smiled. Maybe Castiel wasn’t used to be flirted with or didn’t want Dean to flirt with him but Castiel’s reaction was funny to Dean either way in his buzzed state and he laughed a little. 

“What’s so funny?” Castiel wanted to know then narrowed his eyes. “Are you…drunk?”

“Maybe a little,” Dean said before he saw Castiel’s shocked face and scrambled to save himself, “Shit, wait… no, I’m not.” 

“It’s okay,” Castiel assured, still a little bewildered, “Like I said, you’re not in trouble.”

“Why not? I thought you would have loved a reason to bust me,” Dean said, finishing his smoke. “After all the shit I’ve pulled?”

“I used to want to get you in trouble,” Castiel admitted. “Since you got here, you’ve been nothing but problematic.”

“Then…” 

Dean didn’t get a chance to ask why Castiel changed his mind.

“What happened in Zachariah’s office after we fought?” Cas interrupted. “You’re different.”

“Yeah, I follow the rules. Isn’t that what you all want here?” Dean answered, effectively avoiding actually answering. They could both keep secrets. If he wouldn’t say why he wasn’t busting him, then he wouldn’t mention Sam or his visit home next weekend. 

“No. That’s just what my family wants. You’re kind of boring now,” Castiel said, trying not to smile. 

“Thanks,” Dean smirked. 

“But you’re kind of breaking the rules anyways.”

“Yeah, I suppose I am,” Dean laughed. He was smoking, drinking, and out past lights out. Plus, the little get-together that was currently in his room. “It’s a lot more fun than following them.”

“It also seems bad for your health,” Cas observed.

Dean shrugged.

“I heard about your family,” Dean said after a pause. “They’re everywhere at this place.”

“Yes. Except my father. He’s overseas,” Castiel explained. 

Dean couldn’t help but laugh some more.

“What’s funny now?” Castiel asked with furrowed eyebrows.

“Sorry, it’s just… absent father. I can relate. Families can be tough.” 

They shared a look of understanding. Dean didn’t know what the deal was with Castiel’s mom but maybe he didn’t want to talk about her like Dean never talked about his mom. It was different than their usual fighting but felt good. Somehow, this uptight boy had changed since Dean first met him in this same spot. Although Dean figured he had changed a bit, too.

“You know, I think that’s the first normal conversation we’ve really had,” Castiel observed.

“I think so, too. Your face is looking better by the way,” Dean teased lightly. 

“Yours too,” Castiel teased back. 

Their banter felt natural, like it was the usual way their interacted instead of harsh words or fists. Dean looked at the other boy and threw caution to the wind. It might not have been the best idea but he wanted to keep talking to Castiel and the booze gave him some extra confidence.

“We have vodka in our room. Join us for a shot?” Dean asked.

“Are you sure? I thought you hated me,” Cas responded.

“I don’t,” Dean said. “Come on, one drink.”

Dean didn’t know what made the strict and uptight Castiel Novak say yes, but he did.

 

“Look who I found!” Dean announced as he walked back into his room. Castiel followed him in but timidly. Dean didn’t really know who Castiel normally hung out with but it certainly wasn’t this group. Benny and Charlie hid their startled faces quickly with a welcoming smile and Garth looked intimidated. 

“Bring back the booze,” Dean exclaimed. Charlie handed it to him and he took a pull. “Here you go,” he said, giving it to Castiel. 

Castiel looked unsure and glanced at the door to make sure it was shut. He wrapped his lips around the bottle and tipped it back. He swallowed and coughed just a little, taking it like a champion. Now they all knew the burn of bad vodka. 

Dean had been distracted watching Castiel’s pink lips close around the bottle and licked his own without thinking. He stared a moment more but snapped out of it when Castiel caught him looking. He told himself that it was only the alcohol warming his cheeks. 

Dean took the bottle and handed it to Garth. Everyone got one more sip in before it was empty. After hiding the bottle under his bed, he sat on it. He looked at Castiel and pat the bed next to him, motioning him to sit. 

The five of them talked and laughed. Dean was hyper aware of how close Castiel had sat to him, maybe on purpose but maybe not. Their shoulders and knees were almost touching. The alcohol might have made Dean do something stupid, like put his hand on Castiel’s knee, or even kiss him, if his friends weren’t in the room. He was glad they were there. Just because Castiel had finally let loose a little didn’t mean he would want something like that to happen. The two had literally just started to get along and he wasn’t about to screw it up. It was doubtful he wanted anything like that to happen with Dean anyways. Castiel was a good guy even if he was a little too much to handle sometimes. Why would he want to hang out with Dean at all or do anything else?

There wasn’t time to think too much about it. Two sharp knocks on the door interrupted the little party. 

“Shit,” Dean said. He stood up, dug gum out his backpack and started to chew to hide the smell of booze and smoke on his breath before he answered the door. 

“What the hell is going on here?” Henriksen asked when Dean opened up. Everyone behind him jumped to their feet and sobered up, trying to act normal.

“Um…” Dean really didn’t have a good answer for this, not one to keep them out of trouble. Henriksen walked in and Dean froze by the door.

“None of you are supposed to be out of your own rooms. Fitzgerald, Bradbury that’s a demerit. Out,” he barked. The two of them scrambled past him silently and out the door.

“Lafitte, Novak… I would expect this kind of crap from Winchester, not from the two of you.”

“It was my idea,” Dean stated boldly, jumping into action, “sir.”

Henriksen turned around slowly, keen to hear Dean out. 

“I invited Charlie and Garth over even though Benny said it was a bad idea. Castiel was breaking it up,” Dean lied. He couldn’t let Castiel take any blame when he invited him, knowing how much trouble he could get in. 

“Novak, out. You did your job,” Henriksen commanded. Castiel left without a word but he spared Dean a grateful look over Henriksen’s shoulder. 

“Lafitte, you’ll have to get a demerit as this is still your room with people in it past curfew,” Henriksen explained but he sounded a little regretful. He knew Benny normally behaved.

Dean winced in preparation for his punishment since he knew that Henriksen liked him the least. 

“Winchester, your idea? That’ll be two demerits. I’ll have to tell Colonel Milton about this as well. I was recently made aware that you had an arrangement next weekend to go home?” 

Dean nodded, not liking where this was headed.

“Don’t count on it happening,” Henriksen snapped before leaving the room. 

Dean collapsed on his bed, tears filling his eyes as he turned to face the wall. Now, he couldn’t see Sam. He had protected his friends and Castiel but he didn’t know if it was worth it.

 

Sunday dawned and Dean was in a shitty mood. Not only did his stomach hurt and his head feel foggy from a minor hangover, he had the looming knowledge that he couldn’t see Sam next weekend. 

Dean stuck to his bed most of the day. Since he was already in trouble and his deal with Milton was screwed to hell, he didn’t bother doing any of his homework either. 

Monday dawned way too early. Dean half-assed making his bed but Henriksen didn’t say anything. He did give Dean a demerit when he showed up five minutes late to class, though. Now, that was three total. 

“Okay,” Dean shrugged at the punishment. He sat down and folded his arms, not bothering to open his backpack to get his notebook out. It was hard for Dean to find it in himself to care.

He had so little fight left in him that he didn’t even talk during exercises once. After they finished, he went back to his room and skipped dinner. 

“Hey. Grabbed a biscuit from the mess hall if you want,” Benny said when he sat down at his desk to start his homework after dinner. 

“No thanks,” Dean said meekly, “not hungry.” 

Benny worked as Dean stayed in bed. He appreciated Benny looking out for him but really didn’t want to eat. 

“Get to work, Winchester,” Henriksen said when he walked past their door. Dean slowly moved to his desk but only did half of every assignment. He couldn’t be bothered to focus long enough on one thing. 

Several soft knocks, very different from Henriksen’s harsh two, came at the open door when study hours were done. Dean looked up and saw Castiel.

“Dean, can I talk to you?” he asked. Dean raised his eyebrows and gave a look to Benny before he walked into the hallway after Castiel.

“What’s up?” Dean asked a little uneasily. It was difficult getting over wanting to punch him in the face. They had gone an entire month constantly at each’s others’ throats but the weekend kind of changed things. It didn’t seem like they were enemies anymore.

“I wanted to say thank you. For Saturday. You didn’t have to…”

“It was my fault you were there, I couldn’t just let you get in trouble,” Dean said, trying to shrug it off. 

“You didn’t physically drag me there, I chose to go. So, thank you,” Castiel continued. “Besides Henriksen showing up, it was kind of fun. You’re not as big of an ass when you’ve had a little to drink.”

Dean laughed in what felt like ages even though it had only been a couple days. He never thought Castiel of all people could be the one to cheer him up by something as simple as talking to him. 

“Thanks. You know, you weren’t too uptight and lame as you usually are,” Dean teased back.

“Touché,” Castiel countered. “Maybe we could hang out more?”

“Uh, sure,” Dean said. “You know where to find me, right next door.”

They laughed together before Castiel explained he had more work to do and they said goodbye. Dean walked back into his little room. 

“That was weird, right?” Dean asked Benny, knowing he would have heard everything from his seat at his desk. 

“Very,” Benny agreed. 

Dean replayed the encounter in his head and couldn’t explain it. A week ago, they were punching each other in the face. Now, they had moved to more like…acquaintances? Dean didn’t know what to call it but he found himself smiling to himself when Benny looked back down to his work. 

 

His mood improved after talking to Castiel. He turned in his half-completed assignments the next day and didn’t care about the teachers’ disapproving looks. 

At lunch, Castiel and his brother Gabriel sat next to Dean and his friends at their table. The conversation stalled. It was a long table with benches for seats. Charlie and Garth were at the end of the table so Benny was next to Cas and Dean was next to Gabriel.

“Castiel. A pleasant surprise,” Benny said with a wry smile. 

“Hello Benny,” Castiel replied, looking a little more uncomfortable than he had a second ago. 

“Gabriel, you don’t look happy to be here,” Dean said, glancing at Gabriel’s sour look.

“You’re smarter than you look, Dean-O,” Gabriel answered.

“Ouch,” Benny joked. Dean laughed, not offended by Gabriel’s retort. 

“So, what’s up guys?” Charlie asked, trying to smooth over the slight tension.

“I figured we would sit here instead of with our cousins today. I enjoyed hanging out with all of you on Saturday and wanted Gabriel to officially meet you,” Castiel explained. When Castiel said the part about enjoying hanging out, he was looking right at Dean who then had to duck his head and focus on his food to hide the warmth in his cheeks. There was quick introductions to Castiel’s brother as they ate.

“We all got demerits. Except you,” Benny pointed out, biting his sandwich. 

Without thinking, Dean kicked him under the table, earning him a weird look. He didn’t know why he had done it. Benny talked shit about Castiel and Dean just reacted. 

“Oh, play nice. That wasn’t Castiel’s fault,” Charlie reasoned. Benny shrugged. Cas looked like he kind of wanted to say something to Benny but didn’t. 

The conversation turned more cordial after that. Although Gabriel didn’t say much, he didn’t seem so grumpy when lunch was over. Dean was more focused on Castiel since he was unsure of why he was being so nice. They had talked yesterday night and weren’t fighting anymore, it seemed, but it didn’t explain why he joined them for lunch but Dean didn’t mind. 

 

In drill, he was quiet. That earned him a thankful nod from Castiel who was grateful to not put up with his usual shit. Dean was still too confused with the change in their relationship to say much. It was driving him nuts. Why would Castiel want to hang out with them or, more specifically, hang out with Dean?

That question continued to burn at him as Castiel and Gabriel joined them at lunch for the rest of the week. He didn’t say anything though because he didn’t want Castiel to leave. It was weird that Dean wanted Castiel around after what they had been through but he definitely liked being on the same side as Castiel instead of fighting. The guy had a dry sense of humor and sometimes made Dean laugh just by quirky things he said.

On Thursday, he finally borrowed Benny’s phone to call Sam. He had put it off long enough because he hated disappointing Sam. 

“Hello?” Sam answered. He had probably just gotten home from school and was grabbing a snack. 

“Hey Sam, it’s me,” Dean greeted. 

“Hi Dean!” Sam said, very clearly sounding like he was smiling. “You’re still coming home this weekend, right?

“No,” Dean said, closing his eyes in regret, “I can’t.”

“Oh,” Sam said, sounding so much younger than he was. It broke Dean’s heart.

“I’m sorry, I got in trouble and I can’t leave. Soon though, okay? And if not soon, for Thanksgiving. That’s not too far away.”

“All right. I’m going to start my homework,” Sam said, a little forlorn.

“Okay. I’ll see you soon. Bye.”

They hung up and he wordlessly handed the phone back to Benny who put it in his pocket. He didn’t know everything about Dean and his brother but he knew how much he wanted to go home to see him from hearing their conversations, Dean’s side anyways. It sucked to see Dean hurt since he couldn’t visit Sam but there wasn’t too much Benny could do. 

 

October continued on and brought a nasty chill. Every student wore the sweatshirt to exercises and sometimes many more layers underneath it. Dean didn’t know what happened when it got really cold and if they kept going outside but he was afraid to ask. 

Dean continued to get demerits but not at exercises. He never finished all of his homework or made his bed perfectly. After lunch most days, he went into Jody Mills’ science class a few minutes late with a cookie in his hand since he took his sweet time. The demerits piled up but he usually completed his punishments before the weekend to go into town. It wasn’t possible to visit Sam yet so Dean was still just counting down until Thanksgiving. 

The lunch group still continued to eat together every day. Clearly, Gabriel was still a little reluctant but Castiel seemed to really like hanging out with them now. The group had almost become friends. Unlikely ones for sure but friends nonetheless. Dean wasn’t sure how long they could keep playing nice until he or Castiel snapped. They had gone too long fighting to just forget about it completely.

Dean stopped bothering Castiel during exercises, too. They seemed like almost friends now and the guy had actually seemed to loosen up a little around their little group. The only time Castiel acted like the old Castiel was when he had to take orders from Raphael or Michael. Dean had even seen him listen to Lucifer despite being the same rank as him. Lucifer was a platoon leader under Michael and apparently being below his twin never sat well with him.

Their now regular group of five was studying together in the library for an upcoming math test but Dean couldn’t focus. Raphael had stopped by to steal Castiel’s notes and Castiel had let him right before Michael had critiqued his new choice in his friends. No one said a word against the big, bad company leaders even though Dean wanted to. 

“Why do you listen to your cousins? They’re dicks,” Dean said. It wasn’t the first time he had said something bad about Castiel and Gabriel’s family. 

“They look out for me. And Gabriel,” Castiel said, not looking up from his book. 

“You more than me,” Gabriel said, slightly under his breath. Everyone heard anyways. Gabriel was older and didn’t get as much crap from other students like Castiel seemed to so he needed less intervention from their cousins. 

“Well… yeah,” Castiel shrugged. “They don’t like anyone giving me problems outside of the family. They see it as their job to protect me. So, they don’t like you very much Dean.”

“Me? What’d I do?” Dean asked incredulously. He knew why but it was fun to feign innocence so he could see Castiel’s reaction. 

“Your first month here, you gave me more trouble than Crowley, Dick and Alastair combined have ever given me,” Castiel answered truthfully. That trio was trouble but had never stepped out of line as much as Dean or bothered Castiel as much. 

“Not like you didn’t deserve it,” Dean smirked. Castiel looked shocked for a moment then his faced softened almost into a smile. 

“Guys, we’re studying?” Charlie said, reigning in their focus. Benny agreed. Gabriel sighed since he had enjoyed the distraction. It turned out he hated studying almost as much as Dean. 

Everyone’s eyes went back to their books and notes. 

Dean kept smiling and looked up and caught Castiel’s eyes when he looked up too. They grinned wide as if they were sharing some kind of secret. Those blue eyes warmed Dean to his fingertips and all hopes of focusing on math went out the window. That smile, just for Dean, felt special. 

_Yeah, he’s your friend. Friends laugh. Knock it off and study before you fail another test, stupid_ , Dean thought. 

He furrowed his eyebrows and started to memorize formulas before he though too long and hard about something that wasn’t there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	6. Thunderstruck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I looked round and I knew there was no turning back. My mind raced and I thought, what could I do?" Thunderstruck, AC/DC

Benny and Charlie sat at a table eating breakfast by themselves on a Sunday in late October. Castiel was arguing with his cousins, accompanied by Gabriel, across the room. Dean wasn’t there since he had only groaned when Benny tried to wake him up. He technically didn’t have to go to breakfast so he usually didn’t on weekends. It was at nine which was too early for him. Garth was also probably still sleeping. 

“So, what’s going on with Castiel and Gabriel?” Charlie asked, eyeing the Novaks and Miltons across the room. 

“They’re talking to Michael and Raphael. What else is new?” Benny responded, kind of bored. More and more, Castiel seemed to be clashing with his cousins.

“No, I mean… why do they hang out with us now?” Charlie insisted. Benny looked up from his cereal. 

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “Maybe they’re sick of hanging out with just each other? The rest of their family just yells at them it seems. Gotta branch out.”

“So, you don’t think there’s anything going on between Dean and Castiel?” Charlie pressed. 

“They stopped beating each other up and I’m glad. Oh wait, like…”

“Yes. Like, hardcore crushing on each other,” Charlie said with a “duh” tone. 

“Just because you’re a lesbian doesn’t mean you have 100 percent accurate gay-dar,” Benny joked. 

“No, because I’m awesome it does. You know my family shipped me here because I’m gay. Maybe the same thing happened to Dean,” Charlie guessed. 

Benny thought about it. Dean clearly hated this place and wasn’t here voluntarily. Charlie could be right about that much. But his roommate and Castiel? Although it would be one reason for Castiel to become a more consistent presence. 

“You might be partially right. We don’t know why he’s here. But he and Castiel hated each other until a couple weeks ago. How do you explain that?” 

“Love and hate are very closely related emotions,” Charlie pointed out. 

Both of them continued to eat and consider. It could be true and if Dean wanted to tell them anything, he would. It would just have to be on his own time and they wouldn’t push. 

 

~

“No, that’s not right,” Dean said. 

He was studying with Benny and Castiel in the library after dinner the following day. They were quizzing each other for tomorrow’s history test with Henriksen. Charlie needed to work on something with Garth for another class and Gabriel, according to Castiel, just didn’t want to hang out with them at the moment. 

“Yes, it is,” Castiel argued. 

“I have the flashcard you made right here and you’re wrong,” Dean replied, probably more smug than he needed to be. Even if he didn’t hate Castiel or fight him anymore, it was still fun to mess with him. 

“Let me see,” Castiel said, snatching the card out of Dean’s hand before he could react. He furrowed his eyebrows as he read the facts he had written about WWII, tilting his head a little. 

“Told you,” Dean smirked. Castiel threw the card back at him. Dean laughed at Castiel’s huffiness. 

“All right,” Benny interjected, “ask me one.” 

Dean had honestly almost forgotten Benny was there for a second. He had been so wrapped up in Castiel’s frustrated face and how grumpy he could be. It was kind of funny and made Dean smile. 

The three continued to quiz each other until they felt pretty good with the material. Benny wanted to head back to the barracks but Dean still had math to work on. Since he mostly understood it, he actually wanted to complete the assignment. He had no idea how good feeling smart was until he came here. 

“Oh, I already finished that,” Benny said, putting stuff into his backpack to leave.

“I didn’t,” Castiel said. “Do you want to work on it?”

“I…uh, sure,” Dean agreed, a little hesitant. 

He still wasn’t entirely used to Castiel hanging out with them and he definitely wasn’t used to being with just Castiel. They mostly were friendly but there were still little arguments here and there, mostly about his dick cousins. 

“I’ll see ya, then,” Benny said. He walked away from the table. 

Dean busied himself digging his math book and notebook out of his backpack. He made a mental note to buy a new notebook the next time he was in town since this one was almost full. Never before had he taken so many notes during class. This place was making an honest student out of him. 

“Dean?” 

“What?” Dean asked, looking at Castiel. He hadn’t heard him say anything.

“I asked if you started it yet. The assignment,” Castiel repeated patiently. 

“Oh. Right. No, I haven’t,” Dean said. 

They both got to work. Since the table they were at was circular they ended up pretty close to each other and it was more obvious without Benny who had been on the opposite side to balance it out. Also, without anyone else with them, Dean was hyperaware of it. The homework didn’t take very long especially since they were working together. 

“I really want pie right now. The one they had at dinner?” Dean said, looking at Castiel. “I’m sure they have extra.”

“The mess hall is closed,” Castiel stated. Dean gave him a look.

“Come on,” Dean smiled, eyes lit with mischief. “Don’t tell me you don’t want pie.”

“I guess I do but…” Castiel said and paused. 

He took one look at Dean’s pleading eyes and gave in.

“All right.”

“Seriously?” Dean grinned even bigger. 

“Yes. But we better not get caught.”

“I promise,” Dean winked before he caught himself. He didn’t see Castiel’s reaction since he was busy hiding the warmth in his cheeks by stuffing his math stuff back into his bag, suddenly self-conscious. He couldn’t believe he just did that. 

_Get it together_ , he snapped at himself. He told himself Castiel probably just brushed it off and he could move on but a nagging part of him told him to look, to see if he had gotten a little red. The rational part of his brain kept his eyes anywhere but Castiel. 

 

In the last bit of daylight they had left, Dean and Castiel very carefully walked across campus. At the moment, they wouldn’t be in trouble if they were caught outside but it would be hard to explain why they were headed in the opposite direction of the dorm building where they needed to be pretty soon. 

They reached the front door to the mess hall which was, of course, locked.

“Now what?” Castiel asked. 

“Have a little faith, Cas,” Dean said, digging a lock pick kit out his backpack. The nickname rolled off his tongue and neither of them batted an eye.

“In you?” Cas asked.

“Yes.” 

They got in and made their way in the dark to the kitchen in the back. It was hard to go through the long tables and benches in the dark but they did.

It was bold but they turned on the light once they got to the kitchen. Dean quickly found the pies in the large industrial fridge. He cut two slices and handed one to Cas. They jumped up and sat on the center island counter that had been cleared off after dinner. 

“Damn, this is amazing,” Dean said, closing his eyes as he ate his apple pie. 

Cas shrugged and chewed. He liked it all right but he didn’t quite have the same reaction.

“Dean, can I ask you something?” Cas asked. 

Dean’s eyes opened and he waited for Cas to continue. A million potential questions crossed Dean’s mind for what Cas could ask and he didn’t know where this was going. 

“Why do you hate this place so much?”

The question kind of came out of nowhere but was easy enough to answer. Dean slowly chewed his pie to delay answering. 

“Well, I don’t know if you noticed,” Dean started, “but I kind of have trouble with authority?”

“I did notice, actually,” Cas laughed. “I imagine that’s why we didn’t get along very well to start.”

“Yeah. I was kind of pissed at being stuck here and all of the rules. You were the second person I met and you were so uptight,” Dean said, focusing on his pie and not meeting Cas’s eyes. “We definitely did not get off on the right foot.”

“You hated me when you first met me?” Cas asked.

“Maybe a little,” Dean looked over at Cas, “but not anymore. I think I took my anger out on you. It wasn’t fair. I was mad at my dad and the school…”

Dean paused, realizing he had maybe overshared.

“Your dad?” Cas asked, not prying but curious.

“Long story,” Dean dismissed. “One for another time.”

They both smiled for a brief moment before focusing again on their desert. The promise for hanging out even more, possibly just the two of them, didn’t go unnoticed by either of them and it was a thrilling thought for Dean. Spending time with Cas was actually kind of awesome. 

Thinking back, Dean wasn’t even sure if he ever hated Castiel. They had argued and fought and through it all Dean had found Cas extremely frustrating but still attractive. As he got to know Cas, he realized how much more there was to him than rule-following, his family and his looks. He was smart and could be surprisingly sweet. He cared about Gabriel a lot and was rather quite selfless.

“Why are you here if you don’t want to be?” Cas wondered, interrupting Dean’s thoughts. That was good because it was a little weird to be building a list of traits you liked in a person while sitting next to them. 

That was a conversation he wasn’t sure he wanted to have yet. He hadn’t even told Benny and Charlie any of that. It was a story of his father and his bisexuality that he was still coming to terms with and a younger brother he missed like crazy.

Dean didn’t have the chance to explain anything even if he wanted to since they heard someone outside of the kitchen. 

“Shit,” Dean cursed, jumping off the counter. Cas followed suit. They silently placed their plates and forks in the sink and turned off the light. Slowly, they edged their way to the back door that would be their escape. The two of them got to that door and slipped outside. 

Both of them were on the edge of laughing but kept quiet still as they moved swiftly towards the dorm building. 

“Hold it right there,” a voice said behind them. 

Dean’s initial reaction was to run but Cas stopped and turned around so Dean did, too. He could have figured Michael would be the one to have caught them.

“What’s up?” Dean asked innocently enough. 

He was standing close enough to Cas to feel him tense. He knew Dean had a tendency to say the wrong thing in these situations and would have preferred to do the talking but it wasn’t exactly in Dean’s nature to just stand by and watch. 

“Why aren’t you in your rooms?” Michael asked, looking at Dean and Cas like vermin. 

“We’re on our way,” Cas explained. 

“Were you just in the mess hall having a little dessert?” Michael accused. 

“What?” Dean said, mustering as much overdramatic disbelief as he could. “We would never. You know your cousin, stickler for the rules.”

“Maybe he is. But you’re not, Winchester.”

Dean shrugged, he couldn’t argue with that. 

“Get back to your dorms. Now,” he ordered. They both turned to go. 

“And Castiel?” Michael called and they turned around again. “Consider keeping better company.”

 

~

They got back to their rooms, still a little high from the adrenaline of almost getting in trouble, and stood between their doors in the hallway. 

Dean laughed and shook his head.

“What?” Cas asked, laughing a little, too. 

“It’s just…I haven’t had that much fun in a while, man,” Dean smiled. 

“I had fun, too,” Cas smiled back.

There was a pause that only got a little awkward when Dean’s eyes flicked to Cas’s lips. He mentally kicked himself as he took a step back.

“I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow then,” Dean said, walking over to his room.

“Bye Dean,” Cas said before disappearing into his own room.

Dean walked into his room, still smiling. 

“What are you smiling about?” Benny asked, eyeing Dean somewhat suspiciously. 

“Hmm?” Dean asked, slightly distracted. “Oh, nothing.”

“Math homework that fun, huh?” Benny joked.

“Sure,” Dean replied. “But sneaking into the mess hall to get pie? Better.”

“By yourself?” 

“With Cas.”

“Cas,” Benny stated, stumped at the story and new nickname. “Castiel? Broke the rules?”

“He did when he came to drink with us, too,” Dean interjected. 

“Yeah, that’s true. You are a poor influence,” Benny shook his head. 

Dean smiled again and flopped on his bed. There was a semblance of truth to that statement and Dean found it amusing. 

In all the time Benny had known Castiel Novak, which was over two years, he had never broken the rules or disobeyed at all. Not once, not even a little late to anything. Now, he was doing so on an almost regular basis. Benny was glad Castiel and Dean weren’t going at it anymore but he wasn’t sure if this was an improvement or not. He thought about what Charlie and he had discussed at breakfast the day before and reconsidered. If that goofy smile Dean had right now was any tell, he was gone on the boy. Even if he wouldn’t admit it out loud to his friends. 

~

Dean grew more and more accustomed to Cas. They sat next to each other during meals and even during the classes they shared together. Dean, if he got to the cafeteria or class first, found himself looking for Cas. 

Benny had never really gotten friendly with Castiel before but now he didn’t have a lot of choice. Cas was a consistent presence with Dean. Not that Benny minded but it was certainly a change. Charlie always shot “I told you so” looks at Benny while Dean and Cas weren’t paying attention because one was looking at the other. 

Cas’s cousins still weren’t happy with them all hanging out. Gabriel was more torn when it came to who he would spend his time with. He was more loyal to their cousins than Castiel was so his time was split between the two. To be honest, Gabriel didn’t like conflict much and just wanted everyone to get along.

The fact that Cas wasn’t giving Raphael his notes from class anymore was bad enough and the pranks they pulled weren’t helping the problem either. Since the school preached discipline and self-reliance, laundry was a personal responsibility. With Benny as a watch, Dean and Cas had snuck into the laundry room to throw a red shirt into Raphael’s load of whites. Cas was still getting used to not fitting the mold his family wanted and had almost backed out but Dean convinced him to go through with it. They had listened to his outraged cries when he returned to move them to the dryer and they sprinted down the hallway laughing before he could spot them.

The one other prank Dean found particularly hilarious had been loosening the lid of the salt shaker at the table Michael, Raphael and Lucifer usually sat at with Gabriel occasionally joining them. Sure it was an immature little joke but Dean didn’t care. Michael had inadvertently dumped basically the entire bottle onto his food. The stern glare across the cafeteria at Dean’s loud laughter was frightening but Dean didn’t care. Cas’s small smile made it worth it. 

Dean also made sure to swindle the trio of Michael, Lucifer and Raphael out of their money. It just so happened, they were among the guys playing pool on the first day Dean was here and had thought about hustling them. Thanks to Dean’s familiarity with dive bars and shooting pool from his father, he kicked their asses every time and happily took their money.

If there were review games in class, Dean made sure to beat Cas’s cousins. In a one on one competition at the blackboard for math, Dean smoked Raphael in doing the problem. Raphael complained so only Dean could hear that someone as trashy and pathetic shouldn’t have won so Dean was about to take a swing before the teacher held him back. The demerit for that was worth it.

November was upon them and Dean had officially been there for a month and a half. For exercises, running still took place outside but the subsequent exercises were inside in a gymnasium. Dean kept up his good behavior, mostly, during them even though he still didn’t like them. If he had to do any extra push-ups for talking, they were given by Raphael. He didn’t mouth off to Cas anymore and it was more fun screwing with Raphael.

Dean did not maintain much good behavior during classes. He regularly talked back and got demerits. He had already been back to see Zachariah at the start of the month. The meeting was more or less the same as before. Zachariah still wanted Dean to start cooperating and used John and Sam as leverage. 

“What would your father say about your behavior?” he had asked.

 _I don’t fucking care what he thinks anymore_ , Dean had thought boldly and it was true. He didn’t. However, thinking it and acting like it when he finally he saw his father again would be two very different things.

“He wants me to fix you at all costs. If you’re trying to get kicked out, it won’t work,” Zachariah continued. “As a former military man, your father has some strings to pull. You’re stuck here so you might as well give in and behave.”

Zachariah had also dangled visiting Sam again as incentive but Thanksgiving was close. All students would be cleared to leave so that held no meaning since he could see him soon and Dean continued to act in the same way.

The only teacher that really noticed and cared that Cas and Dean had become friends was Henriksen. On a random mid-November Tuesday, he decided to say something after the two boys continued whispering back and forth through his class.

“Novak, can you stay after class please?” Henriksen asked. 

Dean laughed a little and bumped his shoulder in a friendly way on his way out. If Dean had to guess, Cas had never been asked to stay after class by a teacher unless it was to maybe get an award or something of that nature. They had their next class together but Dean would have to go without him.

When Cas came into that class, his eyebrows were knit together like he was thinking very hard about something. He was so distracted that he didn’t know an answer when Miss Moseley called on him. 

“Cas, what’s up? You’ve looked constipated since Henriksen made you stay back,” Dean asked as they were in line to get food at lunch. 

“I… it’s nothing. You know Henriksen…”

“He can be an ass but… What’d he say?” Dean wanted to know. 

“Nothing my cousins haven’t. He was upset I was talking to you during class and he expressed concern at how close we’ve gotten.”

“Ah. Worried I’m corrupting you?” Dean laughed.

“Something like that,” Cas shrugged. “I wonder if he’s talked to Zachariah.” 

“Well, what do you think?” Dean asked, looking at Cas across the table as they sat down. 

“Think about what?” Charlie interrupted, already digging into her pasta. 

“If Dean is corrupting me,” Cas explained, not mentioning his uncle. Dean didn’t blame him. A visit to that guy was unpleasant to say the least. 

“No doubt,” Benny said at the same time Gabriel said, “I’d say so.”

Garth had to agree as well and Charlie nodded. 

Dean laughed again. 

“I can’t be that bad!” he protested even though he knew there was some truth to it. 

“I have never had so many problems with my cousins and teachers than since you arrived,” Cas said. 

“Seriously, that table,” Gabriel motioned with a hand wave at their cousins, “hates you. They want to believe little Cas here will be a perfect obedient angel and platoon leader. It won’t happen if he gets into shenanigans with you all.” 

They all accepted it and moved on with the conversation to something else. Dean didn’t engage as much in the conversation, though. He thought about if he was a bad influence on Cas. Well, if getting Cas to have some fun was corrupting him then so be it. Cas caught Dean staring and smiled a little and Dean smiled back before looking back at his food.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	7. How Far We've Come

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Oh well, I guess we're gonna find out. Let's see how far we've come." How Far We've Come. Matchbox Twenty

It was the last two days of classes before Thanksgiving break. It was more of just a long weekend with only Wednesday through the following Sunday off but every student was buzzing with excitement to go home, if only for a little while. 

Dean hadn’t been able to make it into town since his demerits always piled up and he didn’t want to inconvenience Benny to use his phone again to call Sam. He really wasn’t expecting Sam to call him.

“Hello?” Benny answered his phone while they studied in their room. “Sure, hold on.”

“It’s for you,” he said with a look of concern.

“Hello?” Dean greeted, already fearing the worst from Benny’s look.

“Dean?” Sam said on the other end. He sounded like he’d been crying. 

“Sam, what’s wrong?” Dean asked, his mind going a million miles a minute. If Sam needed him to come home, he would. He would get a cab or steal a car or…

“It’s dad…”

“If he hit you, I swear to God…”

“No, Dean he didn’t. It’s about Thanksgiving. We’re going out of town. He said we’re going to Uncle Bobby’s and we’re driving there and he said you can’t come with,” Sam managed before he was crying again. 

“Is he there?” Dean said in a low growl. Sam made some noise that might have been confirmation. “Put him on.”

There was a bit of shuffling and scuffling around.

“Hello?”

“Dad? What the hell?”

“Hi to you too, son,” John said, with a slight slur.

“Are you….seriously? It’s only seven and you’re drunk?” Dean accused.

“I can do what I want, boy.”

“Like go somewhere for Thanksgiving without me?” 

“Is that why your brother is sobbing like a little girl?” John said, with almost some amusement. Dean felt sick as he heard John yell, “Quit being a baby, Sam!” 

“You’re deliberately taking him away from me, aren’t you? You son of a…”

“Watch it, Dean,” John said menacingly. Even over the phone, Dean had to listen. He grew up fearing that tone because that tone meant business. The distance didn’t matter. 

“You are though,” Dean stated. “Taking Sam away.”

“Yes. That Zachariah guy called to let me know you aren’t exactly behaving over there. I expected better, son. I can’t have you messing Sam up so he ends up like you, okay? I need one of you to turn out okay.”

Dean squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his jaw. His father was so intolerant of who Dean really was that he would keep him from his little brother on Thanksgiving. 

“What would your mother say?” John said. It was soft and Dean was so pissed and he could hear his blood pounding in his ears so he almost missed it. Dean froze up. How dare that bastard bring her up? Dean could hear the clinks of bottles as John went back into the liquor cabinet. 

“She would love me no matter what and you know it,” Dean replied and hung up. There was no way he was going there. He could not talk about his mother even though he knew he was right about how she would treat her son. It hurt too much to remember how loving she was. That was the most he said out loud about her in years. 

Damn it John was a stubborn bastard. He was leaving his son alone on Thanksgiving but it would be impossible to change his mind. Dean wouldn’t get to see Sam for a while longer. 

“Is, uh, is everything okay, Dean?” Benny asked gently. 

“Yeah,” Dean lied, handing the phone back. Benny clearly didn’t believe him but he didn’t press either. 

“It looks like I’m stuck here for Thanksgiving.”

He stormed outside and leaned on the side of the building and chain smoked the rest of his most recent pack. 

 

Wednesday morning, the day before Thanksgiving, Dean said goodbye to Charlie and Benny who were both headed home. Benny was flying all the way back to Louisiana and Charlie was visiting an aunt who lived nearby to the academy. Garth stopped in to say bye and gave them all hugs which Dean reluctantly reciprocated. The kid was quirky but was growing on him slowly. 

Dean was in a shitty mood all day so he turned to his music after dinner. He would have loved to take his dad’s old Impala for a spin and crank the music but he couldn’t. The Impala would be going somewhere Dean knew he couldn’t follow. 

He was cranking the loudest and meanest Metallica he had and it was almost making him feel better. Even if he wasn’t with Sam, the kid would be getting a huge and delicious Thanksgiving meal and that helped his mood. Winchester family holidays were rocky at best but hopefully someone else hosting would mean some peace and sobriety. 

“DEAN!” someone yelled over the music, scaring the hell out of him. 

“Shit,” Dean cursed, pausing the music. It was Cas. The kid always managed to sneak up on him. 

“Cas? What the hell are you still doing here?” 

“Why are you here?” Cas countered. 

“Fair enough. Come on in,” Dean invited, actually glad to have company. He was pretty happy it was Cas who was around.

Castiel came in and sat on Benny’s perfectly made bed across the room from Dean. Benny had refused to leave it messy.

“Remember how I told you my father is overseas?” Cas started. Dean nodded. “That means my only family is here. Gabriel and I stay in the dorms and then eat at Zachariah’s for Thanksgiving.”

“You don’t stay at his house? You’re his nephews!” Dean asked, finding it hard to believe. He knew the guy was a dick but he didn’t even let his own family come home for a holiday? That seemed pretty low. 

Cas just shook his head. There was a pause, Dean just kind of thinking and Cas letting him, before Cas got curious. 

“Why are you still here?”

“My dad is an asshole. He took my brother to a family friend in South Dakota so they’re not home. I had no way to follow them even if I wanted to. It would just piss my dad off, which no one wants, and he’d drag me back here anyways.”

“Why would he do that?” Cas asked, just as shocked as Dean had been a moment ago. 

“He doesn’t want me to…” Dean started then stopped. 

How much did he want to tell Castiel? He still hadn’t even told Charlie, Benny or Garth why he was here. Not completely. Briefly, Dean worried about Cas judging him or not wanting to hang out with him anymore. But as he sat with Castiel now, he knew he trusted him.

“Doesn’t want you to what?” Cas asked unobtrusively, just curiously. 

Dean took a deep breath. He knew he didn’t have to answer and Cas would be cool about it but he wanted to tell someone and there was no one else here. Plus, Cas was a good listener.

“He doesn’t want me to ruin Sam, ruin him so he ends up like me. I’m here to be fixed.”

“Does your brother share your anger and contempt for authority?” Cas guessed, his head tilted to the side. 

Dean had to laugh. It felt good giving their current shitty situations to laugh. 

“No, Sam is a great student. He’d do all right here. My father doesn’t want Sam to like guys at all, like I do,” Dean admitted then looked at Cas cautiously to gauge his response. 

“Oh,” he said. “You’re…”

“Bi,” Dean said. It kind of felt strange on his tongue but was a relief to say at the same time. Cas nodded and simply absorbed the knowledge as if Dean had said he liked the color blue. It was the first time he had actually said who he really was out loud. It had been hard to get a word in edgewise when John had been yelling over his explanation when everything happened. 

“Did your father react poorly when you told him?” 

“That’s a friggin’ understatement,” Dean scoffed. “He caught me with a guy and flipped shit, went completely mental. I was here the next week. I kind of thought bisexual would have been a little better since I still like girls but to him, it’s as good as gay which I guess he hates.”

“And your brother? He knows about it?” 

“No. He might have guessed but I didn’t really have a chance to talk to him about it and I don’t know what John’s been telling him but…” 

“Reactions from your family are hard. That’s why I haven’t told anyone in my family.”

“Told them what?” Dean asked, catching Cas’s eyes and not sure where Cas was going. 

“That I’m gay,” Cas said. He sounded a little unsure or maybe lacking confidence. 

“You haven’t told anyone, have you?” Dean figured. Cas shook his head.

“Not until now,” he said. He smiled at Dean who smiled back. 

Dean didn’t really know how to react, though. It wasn’t every day that you become the only person your enemy-turned-friend told about their sexuality. Hell, no one had ever confided in him like that. Twelve year old Sammy didn’t exactly have any secrets and Dean already knew everything about that kid. Dean and Cas turned out to have a hell of a lot more in common than either could have guessed two months ago, absent fathers and some unaccepting family members to start. 

“Wow,” Dean said. “So none of your family know?”

“You’ve met them. How do you think they’d react?”

It was a good point. Michael and Raphael were dicks and Dean wouldn’t put it past them to be homophobic as well. Lucifer he wasn’t sure about. The guy was creepy for sure and always looked like he was plotting something but Dean couldn’t guess how he would feel. Zachariah was an entirely different case.

“Gabriel would probably the only one okay with it, I suppose. You haven’t told your father?” 

“Haven’t had a chance,” Cas paused. 

Dean almost asked about Cas’s mother but didn’t want to pry in case it was a rough story there. He appreciated that Cas hadn’t asked about his mom.

“Can I tell you something if you promise not to tell another living soul?”

“You just trusted me with something pretty big, Cas. I can handle another secret,” Dean replied. He didn’t want to make light of the situation but he figured a little bit of humor would help Cas feel more at ease. 

“My family, all of the orders and everything… I have doubts. I have questions. More so since you came along,” Cas explained. “It’s not easy being in their control all of the time. I can’t be as rebellious as you.”

“Why not?” Dean smirked. Cas tilted his head and gave Dean a look. “I’m serious! Do what you want, screw the rules.”

“That’s easier said than done, Dean.”

“True. I’m not saying going completely off the rails here but if you get a crap order, don’t follow it. And you could stop taking your family’s shit. You’ve started to do that anyways. Benny noticed and he’s known you longer than I have. The pranks we’ve been pulling? You’ve been sticking it to them for a while.”

“You’re right,” Cas said, sitting up straighter. “I can start trying to do things I want to do and standing up for myself more.”

“That’s the spirit!” Dean exclaimed. They both laughed. Dean looked down because Cas’s gaze had become so…he didn’t know what to call it. Affectionate, maybe? Or grateful? It was definitely intense. Whatever it was, Dean kind of liked it. 

Cas must have looked down as well and glanced at his watch. It had gotten later than they had thought. He got up and thanked Dean before heading to the door to go to his own room. 

“See you Friday?” Dean asked, surprising himself. He found he actually did want to see Cas again soon.

“See you then,” Cas grinned before he left. 

Dean lay in bed and thought about his conversation with a smile. Despite what his friends said before, maybe he wasn’t a bad influence on Cas after all. Getting him to make his own decisions and to be his own person wasn’t a bad thing. 

He tried to shut out the fact that Cas was gay. It didn’t mean he was into him and he wasn’t jumping to any conclusions. They were still friends even if Dean would have been okay with more than that. 

Besides, as much as Dean had told himself he didn’t care what John thought, if he wanted Sam in his life then he would have to play it straight. Literally. That meant no guys so no Castiel, not like that.

 

Dean scrounged up some food for his own Thanksgiving meal in the mess hall. Castiel had gone with his family and no one else was around. It was the quietest Thanksgiving he had ever had but that wasn’t even necessarily a bad thing. It was lonely, though. He wished, not for the first time, that he had a way to talk to Sam. 

The good thing about no one being on campus was no rules. Dean could wake up whenever he wanted, which was noon on Friday. Since he only had Castiel for company, he spent a lot of time with him that day and the day after. 

On the Saturday after Thanksgiving, they spent the majority of the day together and even went into town. They didn’t stay long since Cas didn’t need anything and Dean just needed some more smokes. Dean showed Cas his music and even though he hadn’t heard much of it before, or even the bands’ names, he seemed to like it. It was easier to hide in one of their rooms than to risk running into any of Castiel’s cousins. Gabriel had disappeared but Cas mentioned a local girl he had met in town he could have been visiting named Kali. Some other students were on campus but no one who either of them wanted to hang out with. 

The two of them made sandwiches in the mess hall and were eating them for dinner when Cas took Dean by surprise. 

“I’ve enjoyed spending time with you, Dean,” Cas said.

“Yeah, me too,” Dean said, a little taken aback by Castiel’s bluntness.

It was hard to pretend he wasn’t interested in Cas as more than friends when he said stuff like that but he tried. 

“And I never thought I would, considering how we first started interacting,” Cas said, continuing to eat. 

“I know,” Dean laughed a little. “Your punches hurt like a bitch, for the record.”

They continued to eat and talk until the front doors opened. Michael, Raphael and Lucifer strolled into the mess hall. Upon seeing Cas and Dean, they walked over to their table. It would have been impossible to go unseen since they were the only people in the massive room. 

“Well, what a surprise. Our cousin slumming it with Winchester,” Raphael sneered. 

“I mean, it isn’t really a surprise anymore. Castiel’s chosen him over his own family,” Michael said spitefully. 

“I’m not choosing anyone over my family. I am still your family and Dean is my friend,” Cas explained. Michael and Raphael were clearly pissed and Lucifer stood the side, not seeming to care what happened. 

“Don’t bother, Cas,” Dean said, glaring at the invading trio. “They’re not worth it.”

“We’re his family,” Michael said angrily. 

“Yeah and you treat him so well,” Dean smirked. Michael stepped forward and lifted him off the end of the bench by his shirt. 

“I am sick of your shit, Winchester. How about we teach you a lesson in respect?”

“Michael…stop it,” Cas tried, standing up as well. Raphael stood between him and Michael who hadn’t let go of Dean.

“You can try, it’s not going to do much good,” Dean joked, daring Michael with a look. 

Michael landed a punch in Dean’s stomach causing him to fall to his knees. 

“Dean!” Cas said, voice etched with worry. He shoved past Raphael to crouch next to Dean. 

“Stay out of our way,” Raphael snapped. 

“And don’t think we’ll help you anymore when someone gives you trouble, including Winchester,” Michael said. The three walked back towards the kitchen. Dean stood up slowly.

“Are you all right, Dean?” Cas asked, helping Dean back into his chair. 

“I’m fine,” Dean shrugged then smiled. “To be honest, you punch harder.”

Cas laughed. 

“You know, you were right,” Cas said.

“About what?”

“They are dicks,” Cas said, making Dean laugh. 

 

The next day was Sunday, the last day of November, and Dean couldn’t wait for Benny, Charlie and Garth to get back. He actually kind of missed them.

“Hey!” Benny greeted when he walked back through their door. Dean greeted him back and they swapped stories about the long weekend. Dean didn’t have a crazy lot to say, just that he spent a lot of time with Cas. It didn’t beat Benny’s story about his drunk grandma trying to get into a fight with a neighbor. 

Charlie and Garth stopped by to say hi after they had unpacked. Cas heard the commotion and came over to quickly say hi as well before getting back to his homework. Dean had already done as much as he was going to get done, which wasn’t all of it, before classes started again tomorrow.

“So, you and Cas hung out a lot?” Charlie asked, making it sound as innocent as possible. 

“Yeah. He finally believes me when I say his cousins are dicks,” Dean quipped. “We talked a lot, too.”

“What about?” Garth asked. He was sipping a Slurpee he picked up before he came back. 

“I told him why I’m here,” Dean said, struggling to meet his friends’ eyes. He knew he was going to have to tell them and he was a little nervous. He didn’t know how they would react. 

“Oh,” Benny said. He almost looked disappointed. Dean kind of felt bad he told Cas before Benny because he had been closer to him longer but it just kind of came out. 

“Sorry man, we were just talking and… it doesn’t matter. I told him that my dad stuck me here because he caught me with a guy like, you know… And I told him I’m bi. And I thought you guys should know,” Dean said in a rush. 

“Ha!” Charlie broke the brief silence. “I knew it.”

“What?” Dean asked. How could she have?

“Well, I’m a lesbian and my parents dragged me here for the same thing. That was my guess,” Charlie said. Dean still didn’t know what to say. “Well, Benny agreed.”

“I did not!” Benny said defensively, glaring at Charlie. “I said it was possible.” 

He gave Dean an apologetic look.

“And you don’t care? I mean, we share a room,” Dean asked Benny.

“Oh, come on brother. You know I’m not an asshole” Benny shrugged.

Dean nodded. Benny was awesome that way.

“Why was that you’re guess?” Dean asked Charlie. He wasn’t mad he just wanted to know. 

“Oh, because you and …” Charlie started but Benny looked at her pointedly. “I don’t know. Just an idea. It was that or you got kicked out of your old school and this was the only place that would take your sorry ass.” 

Dean chose to ignore the look they shared and laughed it off. Their second guess was surely plausible. 

Benny still wasn’t sure about Dean’s feelings for Cas and didn’t want to bring it up yet or have Charlie do it. He had just confided in them and could have denied it anyways. Also, it was still unclear to them what Cas’s sexuality was. He might have told Dean but it wouldn’t matter. Dean wouldn’t betray someone’s trust and that’s why Benny liked him. Benny would just have to let things play out. Well, maybe he could help a little. He had one idea and maybe Charlie and Garth would help.


	8. You Really Got Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You got me so I don't know what I'm doing. Yeah, you really got me now, you got me so I can't sleep at night." You Really Got Me, Van Halen

December started cold and only got colder. The students of Lawrence Military Academy still went for runs outside before quickly returning indoors to continue to exercise and run drills in a gymnasium. They had started to use fake rifles like a color guard team in a marching band which Dean found surprisingly fun. He made sure to “accidentally” hit Raphael with his a couple of times until he was forced to do some push-ups. It was possible that Cas spared him a barely there smile when Dean clocked Raphael with the rifle so the push-ups weren’t too bad. To be honest, all of the running and push-ups had gotten Dean into pretty good shape and pissing off Raphael was always entertaining. 

There were two weeks of classes before finals and Dean was nervous for them. He wanted to do well but he still wasn’t used to studying. He realized he could actually get good grades for once and he kind of wanted to. “Smart” was usually a word he reserved for describing Sam but maybe it could be used for him, too. 

Castiel already had a highlighted and detailed schedule for studying. He planned more time for the earlier tests and more time for the harder tests. Instead of making fun of him like he might have in the past, Dean had an idea so he could ace these tests too. 

“Cas, you’ve got quite the schedule there,” Dean said, looking at the sheet in the library. They were with Benny, Garth, Charlie and Gabriel. 

“Yes, I like to be prepared,” Cas said, continuing to work on one of their final math assignments. Dean had already finished it and was working on some history. 

“Do you think I could, uh, join you? When you study?” Dean asked. Cas looked up. 

He lied to himself by saying the tests were mostly the reason and spending more time with Cas would be pure coincidence and happenstance.

“Sure Dean,” Cas answered. Dean smiled as he worked. If anyone could help Dean pass his finals, it would be Castiel. 

Benny and Charlie shared a look that Dean missed as he looked back at Cas who grinned. 

 

“No Dean, like this,” Cas said, correcting Dean for what felt like the thousandth time. Studying math was the worst thing possible on a Saturday morning but it was their last Saturday before finals. 

Dean groaned and dropped his head in his hands. 

“I’m not going to get this,” Dean complained. 

There were too many formulas and rules. School was never his strong suit but math was especially horrible. He liked problem solving in a different way and thinking out of the box and trigonometry had very little wiggle room for that.

“Yes you are,” Cas comforted. He placed his hand on Dean’s wrist to gently coax his hands back down. Dean didn’t think Cas meant anything by it besides a friend helping another friend study but he still felt his cheeks get a little warm when his hands were back on his book. Cas let go. 

“Let’s try again,” Cas suggested. 

Dean nodded since his throat was a little dry and he didn’t trust himself to speak. He could still feel the ghost of Cas’s warm fingers on him. 

They continued to work on math until Dean felt that he understood it more. They moved onto history which Dean was a little bit better at, better than Cas even. He corrected him a few times.

“At least I’m good at one thing,” Dean said when they were wrapping up. They were getting ready to walk back from the library for the night. 

“Dean,” Cas said firmly. Dean paused putting stuff in his backpack. “You are very smart. You’re going to do great on your finals.”

Dean didn’t know what to say. He wasn’t used to hearing anything that nice about himself. He could feel his cheeks warm up again all the way to his ears. 

“You believe that right?” Cas asked. Dean cautioned a glance at him. Cas looked like he desperately needed Dean to believe how smart Cas thought he was. 

“Uh, sure Cas,” Dean shrugged. He stood, put on his leather coat and zipped his backpack shut before putting it on. Cas did the same and they walked out of the library. 

They didn’t say much as they walked back to the dorms. Dean was still reeling from how nice and helpful Cas had been. His dad’s coat wasn’t warm enough for the Kansas winter and his hands were cold. Dean thought about how warm Cas’s hands had been but resisted the urge to hold one, shaking his head at the crazy notion.

“You are smart, Dean. I wouldn’t be surprised if you did better than me,” Cas said. 

Dean laughed self-deprecatingly. He had teachers his whole life telling him he wouldn’t amount to anything after every fight and every failed test. They probably breathed a huge sigh of relief when he didn’t come back to his regular high school this year. John had never given a shit either. Now, someone was telling him he was smart and that he could succeed. It wasn’t something he realized he needed to hear until then and it was a little overwhelming. 

“I’m serious,” Cas said. He reached out and placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder. Dean raised his eyebrows a little and tensed subtly. He was again at a loss for words. He looked at Cas whose eyes were insistent with affection. That blue was so mesmerizing and had been since Dean had first seen them in the sunset of his first night here. 

“I, uh, should go,” Dean stammered, breaking eye contact and stepping back. Cas had no choice but to drop his hand as Dean backed out of reach. Now, he looked kind of confused. 

“Good night Dean,” Cas said, his eyebrows furrowed just a little. 

Dean didn’t say anything and slipped into his room. 

As he tried to fall asleep, he tossed and turned. Those damn blue eyes were burning into his brain and he couldn’t shake the sincerity of Castiel’s kind words. Plus, there was the touch on his shoulder. It was all too much. It could have meant nothing but at the same, it could have meant everything. He wanted to lean into that touch and to reply with how smart and selfless he thought Cas was but the guy kind of took his breath away and he panicked. Hopefully, Cas wasn’t too hurt about him leaving so abruptly like that.

Dean didn’t know if he was overthinking things from Cas’s end, but he did know he liked Cas. Maybe he kind of had the whole time he knew him. Their relationship had been strained but they were friends now. Dean, for the first time in his life, considered having a real relationship with someone, dating and flowers and everything. He wanted to take Cas out and get to know him more because he liked him.

But he also knew he shouldn’t. His father’s words from that one terrible night echoed in his head as he struggled to shake the phantom feeling of Cas’s hand and the warmth of his gaze. 

_No son of mine will be a goddamn queer. What am I supposed to do with you? How can I even look at you now? What about Sam? What about your poor mother?_

Those poisonous words tainted the good memories of Castiel but he couldn’t help it. Dean wasn’t used to good things happening to him and that wasn’t about to change.

 

It was the first day of finals. Dean already took math and science and was sitting in his room going over his history notes. Henriksen’s test was tomorrow and he had promised it would be hard. 

When Castiel had come to ask Dean if he wanted to go to the library since they had the same test, he had declined. Cas had looked a little upset, making Dean’s stomach drop with guilt, but Dean couldn’t deal with his gentle touches and sweet words. It made it too hard. Too hard to ignore his feelings, the feelings he couldn’t act on. 

Dean absent-mindedly tapped his pencil against his book. Instead of reading, he was thinking of how Cas looked when he studied. He always looked so focused and would sometimes mouth the words as he read along. It was cute and he wished he was across a table from him in the library. Dean could sneak a glance while Cas read and smile to himself…

“Dean, you know the dance is this weekend?” Benny asked. 

“Mm hmm,” Dean answered, slightly annoyed Benny distracted him from his daydream. 

The dance Benny meant was on Friday night once all of the finals were over for all the students. It was the last event of the semester and then everyone was free to go home for winter break. It was apparently the only reason that the students had their formal uniforms besides graduation. Dean had stuffed his into a drawer. The rest of his clothes were still on top of his dresser. 

“Charlie and I were thinking…” Benny started, sounding casual. 

Dean picked up his water bottle and took a drink. 

“…you should ask Cas.”

Dean choked and sputtered on his water, almost spitting onto his desk. He was not expecting that by any stretch of the imagination. Benny and Charlie didn’t know how he felt did they? Was he too obvious? Where those two talking about him behind his back?

“What?” Dean snapped, once he could breathe again. Time to go on defense, he figured. 

“You should…”

“I heard you but…what makes you think I would want to? Just because I’m bi?” Dean accused, knowing he sounded ridiculous because Benny wouldn’t be like that. 

It was a lame attempt at deflection and he knew it.

“No, because…well, Charlie and I think it would be a good idea,” Benny explained. 

“Why? I don’t like him like that,” Dean lied, trying to focus on his work again. 

“You sure?” Benny asked. 

“Yes.”

Sure, he was lying and Benny might have known that but he dropped it. Dean wanted to tell Benny he liked Cas because they were friends and he could confide in him but what was the point? Even if Cas felt the same way, which was a big if, that didn’t mean they would go to the dance together. First, it was a freaking military school and it was probably against their outdated rules for two guys to go together. Then, a teacher would tell Zachariah who would tell his father. There was no way it would work. 

 

Dean suffered through the rest of his finals along with everyone else and they were finally over. It was a huge relief and he honestly thought he might have done okay. Cas had been a huge help and he made sure to thank him after their last final. 

“Are you going to the dance tomorrow?” Castiel asked somewhat timidly as they walked back to their dorm. 

“Yup. How about you?” Dean wondered. 

“Yes,” Cas answered. 

“With anyone?” Dean asked. 

“No. The school is rather strict and wouldn’t take kindly to me bringing a male date. My cousins have tried setting me up with Meg in the past but that didn’t work, for obvious reasons.”

Dean held back a laugh at the obliviousness of Cas’s cousins. He had met Meg and she was something else, to put it nicely. She also wasn’t Cas’s type, being a girl and all. 

“Are you going with anyone?” Cas asked, casting a sideways glance. 

“No. Thought about someone, but it wouldn’t work.”

“Oh,” Cas said sympathetically but didn’t pry. He looked like he wanted to ask something. Dean had a brief and crazy thought of just grabbing his friend’s face and kissing him breathless before admitting he meant him and asking him to the ridiculous dance. 

They had returned to their dorm rooms. Dean shook that crazy thought out of his head. 

“Guess I’ll see you tomorrow then Cas,” Dean said, not meeting Cas’s eyes.

“Bye Dean.”

 

Dean and his friends were all in their formal military uniforms. They were pretty much like the regular green ones except blue and slightly fancier. They were definitely more comfortable, too. Dean even hung it up overnight to let the wrinkles smooth out. He also spent a little time combing his hair to make it look better than usual and Benny gave him crap for it. Garth’s uniform was a little big on him which made Dean laugh. Charlie had straightened her long hair and had it half up in an elaborate style. The three of them met with Castiel and Gabriel in the hallway and they walked over to the gym as a group. It was where they usually held exercises but would be decorated to make it presentable for a dance. 

It was a good thing that Cas didn’t have a date or Dean would have gone nuts. It was bad enough he knew he couldn’t do anything about his feelings and a date would have made him more unavailable. He looked unbelievably handsome since the blue uniform brought out his eyes like Dean had never seen before and his hair was combed nicely, too. He wanted to run his hands through it and make it messy. He stuffed his hands in his pockets so he wouldn’t. 

There were twinkly lights, loud music and a lot of people. It was just as cheesy as Dean would have guessed and he smiled a little. 

“What’s amusing to you?” Cas asked, asking because he was genuinely curious. He stood close to Dean along the side of the gym as they all stood to take it in. He seemed to have forgiven or ignored the fact that Dean had been a little less friendly as of late. Their shoulders brushed and Dean’s knees got a little weak. 

“The, uh, whole thing. Feels kind of silly,” Dean shrugged, trying to ignore his stomach’s flips. 

He had never been a huge fan of school dances. It was such a big hype for a few mediocre hours of so-called fun. His past memories of these things had been drinking, hooking up in the Impala or the school’s bathroom and getting kicked out a couple times. One even featured a pretty rough fight. 

“But we kind of have to go,” Cas said, looking at Dean. “It’s sort of a teenage rite of passage or so everyone seems to think.”

Dean didn’t answer. His voice failed him but even if he wanted to, his brain seemed to have disappeared as well. All he could focus on was Cas. His eyes trained on him, how close he was, his smell, like lemon soap, and his closeness, God he was standing so close, and those lips…

“You coming, guys?” Charlie said, snapping him out of whatever was happening. She was looking at them expectantly. She gestured them to come on and the three of them followed Benny and Garth towards the refreshments. Gabriel had already gone somewhere else, presumably with Kali, the local girl he knew and had invited. 

At the refreshment table, he made sure to let Charlie be a buffer between himself and Cas in line and took a deep breath. He needed a bit of distance so he didn’t go mad. As he tried very hard not to think about Cas, someone bumped into him on his left.

“Sorry,” she said. Dean looked and saw Anna, the lovely redhead platoon leader. 

“It’s okay,” Dean smiled. She smiled back. “I’m…”

“Dean. I’m Anna,” she laughed. “Oh, I’ve heard plenty about you.”

“That can’t be good. Although, I guess it depends on the source,” Dean shrugged with one shoulder and grabbed a cookie off the table as the line moved along. 

“Well, the source didn’t paint you in a very good light but I think they might be wrong,” Anna said. 

She watched Dean’s lips as he bit his cookie and chewed. He couldn’t help but smile again while he licked the crumbs off his mouth and her eyes lingered. If he wanted a distraction from Castiel, he found one. 

He ignored his friends and invited Anna to sit with him at a table by themselves. It was far enough away from the music so they could actually hear each other. 

“You look very nice tonight, Anna,” Dean winked. 

On the other side of the table, Anna smiled with a blush and looked down. With one hand, she tucked some hair behind her ear.

“I look like everyone else,” she shrugged. True, she was wearing the same uniform as everyone else but she wore it well.

“Not to me you don’t,” Dean said. It was rather easy to compliment girls to get them to melt right in his hands. Dean had always been pretty good at it. She really was pretty and even if he wished he was alone with…

“Do you want to dance?” Dean asked to derail his own train of thoughts. She nodded. 

They got up as the song that was on changed to a slow song. Dean and Anna found space where everyone had designated the dance floor. He pulled her close, focusing only on her, with his hands on her hips and her hands on his shoulders.

“Why haven’t we talked before?” Dean asked. He made sure to lean in and get close to her ear as he said it. It had been a while since he had really flirted and he had kind of missed it. 

“I don’t know. We don’t really have many classes together and outside, you were always too busy getting in trouble,” she joked. 

Dean laughed.

“So why would a platoon leader want to get mixed up with regular old me?” 

“You seem like fun,” she answered, shrugging a little. 

“Oh, I am,” he winked. “You know what Benny told me the first time I saw you and asked him who you were?”

She raised her eyebrows inviting him to answer his own question. 

“Not to bother since you’d destroy me.”

“Yeah?” Anna smiled. “What’d you say?”

“That I wouldn’t mind one bit,” he said, leaning in close again to her ear. He pulled back a little but was still very close. He took one hand off her hip to brush some hair behind her hair. His eyes flicked to her lips and back to her eyes but she made the final move and leaned in to kiss him. 

They weren’t even kissing for more than minute or even that inappropriately when a hand on Dean’s shoulder pulled him back and apart from Anna. Henriksen was standing there and he was pissed. 

“Winchester, I don’t know how your other schools did it but that doesn’t fly here,” he snapped before walking off. “Don’t let it happen again.”

Dean and Anna laughed a little. 

“Why don’t I get us some punch? We can sit back down,” Dean suggested. 

Anna agreed and went back to their table. Dean walked over to the refreshments table. He told himself he felt pretty good even though Henriksen had yelled at him and even if he had wished he was kissing someone else. She was a nice girl but she wasn’t who he wanted. His brain had finally shut up for a minute during the kiss but now it was spinning. 

Benny walked up beside him, stalling his thoughts. 

“Hey man,” Dean grinned. Benny didn’t look very amused. 

Dean glanced over to the table Benny came from where Charlie and Garth sat. 

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked, his smile falling. “Where’s Cas?” 

“He left, said he didn’t feel good. I don’t think he liked seeing you with his cousin.”

“His what now?” 

Before Dean could comprehend what that meant, a hand on his shoulder spun him around. A punch to his face knocked him down before he could see who had hit him.

“Fuck,” Dean cursed, still on the ground. 

“Stay away from our sister,” Michael said, standing over Dean with Raphael. 

They stormed off and Benny helped Dean up. 

“That would have been nice to know,” Dean grumbled, gingerly touching below his eye. It would probably be a black eye. Great. 

“Maybe you should go talk to Cas,” Benny suggested. 

“What, so he can hit me too?” 

Benny gave him a look. He was right. Since he was too scared to tell Cas how he felt, he had hurt him without meaning to. It had been selfish to use Anna to block Cas out of his mind and Castiel would have every right to punch him. 

“Fine,” Dean conceded. He had to go make this right. 

“You know, maybe before you go you should think about why he was so upset?” Benny said with a little shrug. Dean gave him a confused look. “It might not be because she’s his cousin. It might be because it wasn’t him you were kissing.”

“Wh-?”

Dean opened his mouth to argue but stopped when he saw Benny’s raised eyebrows and knowing look. Dean finally grasped that Benny knew that Dean liked Cas and was too stupid to do anything about it and lying would be pointless. Even if he didn’t know the full scope of why Dean had kept quiet, Benny was right. It didn’t matter how long he knew, or how, it only mattered that he was giving him a shove in the right direction now. 

“Thanks, Benny.”

“Go get him.”


	9. Goodbye Stranger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Goodbye stranger, it's been nice, hope you find your paradise. Tried to see your point of view, hope your dreams will all come true." Goodbye Stranger, Supertramp

Dean left the school gym with every intention of doing what he had wanted to do for a long time. He was going to finally tell Castiel how he felt and hopefully he felt the same way. If he was lucky, they could kiss and forget the whole mess that was tonight. Kissing his crush’s cousin wasn’t his smartest move ever and he prayed Cas could forgive him. He normally wasn’t the praying type but this was a situation that needed all the help he could get so he prayed hard as he ran across campus. The wind whipped in his face and stung. In his rush to chase Cas, he forgot his coat and it was cold outside.

 _Screw what Dad thinks_ , Dean thought. 

Benny had seemed pretty sure that Cas would return his feelings and Dean was terrified but he had to know. John couldn’t dictate his life anymore. He wasn’t here. Dean would love who he wanted, consequences be damned. What would he do, send him away? Too late. That ship had sailed. 

Dean stood hesitantly in front of Cas’s door and gathered up every ounce of courage he had. 

He knocked. 

There wasn’t any answer. He knocked again.

“Cas?” he called. “Come on, man. I need to talk to you.”

He paused then tried the doorknob. It was open. He paused again to give Cas a chance to say something or pick something up to throw if he wanted to and Dean wouldn’t have blamed him. 

Slowly, he cracked the door open and called Cas’s name again. He pushed the door farther open. The room was empty.

“Shit,” Dean said out loud. His next guess would be Gabriel’s room. Then he remembered he had no idea where that was. He walked quickly, almost ran, down the hallway trying to find a door marked “G. Novak.” 

He couldn’t. It hit him that seniors weren’t on this floor. They were on the fifth and sixth floors. Dean bolted up the stairs, two at a time, and ran down the fifth floor hallway, checking every door. None read Gabriel’s name but one did on the sixth floor. It was also empty since Gabriel and Kali presumably snuck off somewhere.

“Fuck,” Dean cursed, significantly out of breath. 

He went back to his room and sat on his bed, feeling disheartened. He was ready to tell Cas and to put it all on the table, after he apologized of course. Even if that was the only thing he said, Dean wanted to apologize to Cas. No, needed to. He felt like such an ass. How could he hurt his friend like that? A friend he wanted to be more than a friend. Surely he had blown any chance of that now. He doubted Castiel would want to be his friend even. Why would he? Dean had fucked up like he had before and he would again. 

_That’s what you do, isn’t it?_ Dean thought. _You let people down and fuck up. All the time._

Benny came back into their room a little bit later. Dean figured the dance was over but it didn’t really matter. He had no idea what time it was. He hadn’t even bothered changing out of his formal uniform from the dance.

“Well?” Benny asked. 

“He wasn’t in his room. Or Gabriel’s. I don’t know where else he would be,” Dean said, staring at the ground. 

Benny sat on his bed across from him. 

“I don’t know either but you tried. You were going to tell him how you feel and you’ll get the chance.”

“We go home for break tomorrow. I already called home and my dad’s getting me pretty early. This was my chance and I fucked it up. Benny, I fucked up so badly.”

“It’ll work out, brother. Just give it time.”

Dean dropped his hands into his head. Benny didn’t know what else to say. He wouldn’t know where to find Cas and if they didn’t tonight, it would have to wait until after break. Benny wasn’t going to give him the “I told you so” bit. If Dean had just asked Cas to the dance in the first place… but thinking like that wouldn’t help. Benny thought more about where Cas could be and drew a blank. As much as he wanted to help his friend, he couldn’t. 

They both tried to fall asleep and while Benny eventually did, Dean couldn’t. He kept listening to hear if Cas came back to his room so he could talk to him. 

He never did.

 

Dean watched the sunrise after a terrible night. He had terrible bags under his eyes and streaks on his face from silent tears falling during the night as he drifted in and out of consciousness. Once it was time for John to come get him, he went to the bathroom to splash water on his face and brushed his teeth. He almost punched his reflection because his self-loathing was at a new low.

After he packed his two bags, leaving his LMA clothes and uniforms in the drawer, he woke Benny up to say goodbye. He also wanted to thank him for finally getting him to act on his feelings or at least try to. 

“See ya man,” Dean said, “and thanks.”

Benny nodded.

Dean walked outside and hopped into the Impala like he wanted to do months ago. Now, he didn’t really want to leave. Not until he talked to Cas. Except that wasn’t going to happen if he couldn’t find him.

“You’re late,” John snapped. 

Luckily, he didn’t look long enough at Dean to see his nice shiner from Michael. Since he caught Dean with that boy, he didn’t look at him the same. The few spared glances now and before he sent him away held barely contained disgust. Sure, Sam was always the favorite but he never let his Dad down. His father never thought he was an abomination before. 

He started driving before Dean completely shut the passenger side door. He stayed quiet. 

“We’re here,” John said some time later, waking Dean up. He blinked his eyes open. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep as it was a relatively short car ride. 

Picking up his bags, he walked up to their little one story house. In the window, a boy’s face was watching him with a huge smile. 

“DEAN!” the kid yelled, throwing the front door open. 

“Sammy!” Dean called, rushing up to greet him. He dropped his duffel bag and enveloped his little brother in a tight hug. All of his worries and tiredness washed away. At the moment, only the kid safe in his arms mattered. 

“I missed you,” Sam said, looking up at Dean. The kid was growing but Dean still had a clear advantage on him. 

“You too,” Dean said, still grinning. He messed up his brother’s hair like he hated and they walked inside, John following behind. 

Dean walked his bags back to his old room he shared with Sam. It was small and really only had room for their two twin beds. Their clothes were all in one closet. The one other bedroom belonged to John, who disappeared into it and shut the door. 

“He say anything?” Sam asked after they closed their door. 

“No and I slept the ride home. Tell me everything that’s going on.”

Sam filled Dean on his grades that were awesome and his friend Jess. 

“She’s funny and smart and we like all the same stuff, Dean. I like her a lot.”

“Did you tell her that?” Dean asked, hoping his brother didn’t make the same mistake he did. 

“Well no…” he furrowed his brow. “Should I?”

“If you like someone, you should let them know. She should know she’s important to you.”

“She is,” Sam beamed. 

Dean laughed and ruffled his hair again. Sam helped him unpack and then they made some pasta for dinner. Sam finally joked about Dean’s black eye and he brushed it off successfully. John didn’t come out of his room and Dean didn’t care. The two brothers stayed up late talking in the dark since Sam had a million questions about military school. Most were ridiculous, like if they had a dungeon, but some were easier to answer. 

“Did you meet any girls?” Sam quizzed. 

“I met plenty, Sam. The school was pretty evenly split,” Dean laughed. He lay on his back, hands behind his head, on his little twin bed on the opposite side of the room than Sam. 

“No, like girls you like.” 

“There was one,” Dean admitted, “that I kissed.”

“Ew,” Sam mocked. 

“You asked. Whatever, I shouldn’t have kissed her anyways.”

“Was she ugly?”

“No.”

“Mean?”

“No.”

“Then what was wrong?”

“I like her cousin,” Dean said. “A lot.” 

He smiled to himself. Damn, that felt good to say out loud. It still sucked he hadn’t told Castiel yet but he would. The first chance he got, he would tell him. Dean made himself that solemn promise then and there.

“Oh. Then why’d you kiss her?”

“It was a mistake.”

“Did you tell her cousin you like her?”

“Him,” Dean corrected without thinking. 

“What?” Sam asked. 

Dean winced but figured it was about time they talked about what was truly behind Dean’s change in school and what he had just said despite his instincts telling him to change the subject. 

“Her cousin’s a guy.”

“But you said…”

“I know. Listen, Dad didn’t just send me away for shits and giggles, Sammy. He caught me kissing another boy and he didn’t like that very much,” Dean explained, toning down the story to keep it PG. Considering what John saw and his apparent homophobia, Dean was lucky a few bruises and military school was all he got. 

“So, you like boys and girls,” Sam stated. 

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Sam asked, with a slight whine. 

“I just did,” Dean replied, shrugging even though Sam couldn’t see it in the dark. 

“I meant before.”

“I didn’t get the chance,” Dean said. “I left before I could explain anything.”

“Okay. Well, you still didn’t tell me why you kissed his cousin. That was stupid.”

“Don’t I know it,” Dean said. He was grateful that Sam had accepted him and moved on so readily. The kid was awesome and Dean was lucky to have him as a brother. 

“I didn’t think he liked me but my friend thought he did but he told me after I kissed Anna, the girl. So, I went to tell him how I feel but didn’t get the chance. This all happened last night and Dad got me before I could talk to him,” Dean continued. 

“Last night? Whoa. That’s what must have kept you up, you look tired.”

Dean laughed. The kid was an observant little pain in the butt. 

“How long?”

“How long what?” Dean asked.

“How long did you know you liked him?”

“A couple months probably,” Dean answered. He wasn’t completely sure when it turned from just thinking Castiel was attractive to genuine attraction but it had to be after their fistfight and Henriksen busting their party. Once they were friends, Dean wanted more. 

“And you never said anything?”

Dean stayed quiet. It sounded absurd when spelled out like this for him. Honestly, he should have spoken up a long time ago but he was too scared. If Cas had rejected him he would have felt…well, like how he felt now. The words of his father also rang in his head all the time which also pushed him away from admitting his feelings. He almost wanted to blame Benny for not saying what he knew sooner but that was irrational and Dean understood that. It was his own damn fault.

“So you’re going to tell him when you go back to school?” Sam asked, breaking the silence.

“Absolutely.”

 

Dean and Sam spent their entire break together. Jess came over a couple times so that Dean could meet her and get to know her and she passed any test he could think of. She and Sam got along really well and were really sweet together. Dean was happy for them. 

Since John and Sam had driven to South Dakota to visit Bobby for Thanksgiving, Bobby made a trip out to Kansas for Christmas. He also brought his friend, Ellen, and her daughter Jo. Dean hadn’t seen any of them in over a year and it was great to get together. 

Ellen and Bobby grumbled like an old married couple which made Sam and Dean laugh and Jo roll her eyes since she was more used to it. Bobby and John argued like they were about to fight since Bobby wasn’t afraid to voice his opinion on John sending Dean to military school. Bobby never liked the military training John had attempted to teach his boys and this was a step too far, Bobby said. John wasn’t about to admit why he truly sent him or that he was wrong so it was like talking to a brick wall. Ellen stepped in the middle before it could escalate, reminding them it was Christmas. 

Dean helped Ellen make the Christmas dinner while Jo and Sam hung out and Bobby and John drank beers and watched TV without talking. John made an off-hand comment that Jo should be helping instead of Dean in the kitchen but Ellen sternly told him she didn’t want the food to burn. Jo wasn’t even offended because she knew Dean was more competent than her when it came to food prep. Ellen’s fierce tone was enough to shut John up. 

It was overall a decent Christmas, better than Dean could remember in a while. Ellen brought a couple new shirts for Dean and Sam which they were grateful for. It was more than their own father had gotten them. He always argued that feeding and housing his boys was enough. 

They all relaxed in the living room and Jo asked Dean about school. Dean kept it vague but said it wasn’t horrible and he was doing well. Jo herself was Sam’s age but was more like Dean since she fought and skipped more than she studied despite how much Ellen and Bobby tried to get her to straighten out and fly right. She was a good kid and Dean knew she would turn out okay. Dean quickly turned the conversation to something else. 

On New Year’s Eve, Dean managed to get some fireworks. Once John was passed out drunk, thankfully in his room, the boys snuck outside to light them off in an empty field after they took the Impala. Dean was technically old enough to drive but didn’t have his license since John never bothered to take him to the DMV to get it. He didn’t care. It was amazing to have them all go off to ring in the New Year and to see awe on Sam’s face. The fun got a little scary when the field caught on fire but they dove into the car and sped away, calling the fire department as soon as they got home since they didn’t have cells. 

Break was coming to a quick close and Dean was getting more nervous every day. He tossed and turned every night trying to figure out how to tell Castiel how he felt. How would he start? Would Cas even want to talk to him ever again? 

He wanted to tell him he admired his loyalty to his family even if they were mostly dicks. He loved how he could be authoritative and in control but could also be gentle. There was so much he liked about Cas that he could talk until he lost his voice. Sam hadn’t brought him back up again and Dean was glad only because he wouldn’t be able to stop himself if he got on the subject of Castiel. 

“Here you go,” John said, tossing an envelope on Dean’s lap as he and Sam watched TV.

“Oh, shit,” Dean muttered. 

“What is it?”

“My grades,” Dean said, staring at the thing like it might bite. 

“Open it, boy. I want to know how you did,” John demanded. 

Dean tore open the envelope. He smiled. He had pulled off all A’s and B’s and one of his A’s was history. He would bet money Henriksen was pissed about that. 

“Motherfucker,” Dean swore. This was the best he ever did. There had never been anything to be proud of before besides bragging about Sam. Now, he could brag about himself. 

“Watch your language,” John chastised, looking over Dean’s shoulder at his grades. 

“Are you seeing this? This is put-on-the-fridge shit!” Dean exclaimed, buzzing with excitement. 

“It’s good,” John muttered. Dean ignored him. These grades weren’t for his father, he got them for himself. Imagine if John knew how much Cas had helped him and that Dean had a crush on him. Dean laughed out loud. 

“You did awesome, Dean,” Sam smiled. Dean smiled back and fussed with his hair. 

“Looks like I made the right call with that school, they’re fixing you. You stopped all that…you know… that crap, right son?” John asked, interrupting the moment. 

Dean figured he meant fooling around with boys. Well, technically he had but not because he wanted to. If he had the opportunity, he would be all over Cas and nothing John could say or do would stop him. 

“Yes, sir,” Dean lied. 

 

The next week was the middle of January and classes would start again soon. John and Sam drove Dean back to LMA. He didn’t want to leave Sam again but he was glad he could see his friends again. Also, there was someone he desperately needed to talk to. The fact that he had seen Sam and was able to talk to him helped make this easier as well. The kid would be just fine.

“I want to only hear good things from this place, you got that?” John commanded.

“Yes sir,” Dean answered and got out of the car. John quickly looked away again. Sam hopped out too and wrapped his arms around his big brother’s middle, resting his head on his chest.

“I’ll miss you, Dean.”

“Yeah, you too. Make sure to talk to Jess, okay?”

“I will,” Sam promised, “if you talk to…you know.”

“Deal.”

Dean said goodbye and they drove off. This time, Dean wasn’t nearly as bitter watching the Impala drive away. His feelings about his father were about the same but he looked around at the campus and didn’t want to throw up at being back so it was an improvement. 

He walked into his room and threw his bags down. It almost felt like home since he spent more time here than his actual home in recent months. He sat on his mattress and felt the familiar stiffness and smiled begrudgingly. It was good to be back. 

The door opened and Benny walked in. He didn’t have bags with them so Dean guessed he had been back but was in the bathroom or somewhere. 

“Dean!” he greeted. Dean stood up and hugged him. “How the hell are you brother?”

“Good man. You?” Dean responded. 

The two lounged and talked about their breaks. Dean told Benny all about Sam and his crush on Jess and Benny talked about his hilarious grandmother again. Dean was mid-laugh when he heard the door next to their room open and close. He froze. Talking to Benny had made him forget what he needed to do. 

“Oh shit. He’s back?” Dean questioned. 

“Yup. Beat me back,” Benny replied, knowing exactly who he meant and what he wanted to do. Dean was glad, as always, that his roommate and he always seemed to be on the same page.

“Crap,” Dean said. He got nervous all over again and wrung his hands together. All of his fear came back along with excited anticipation. What if he rejected him? What if he didn’t? Both seemed scary now but in different ways. 

“Go over there you wimp,” Benny teased. 

Dean took a deep breath and got up to go finally talk to Castiel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	10. I Can't Fight This Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What started out as friendship has grown stronger. You give my life direction, you make everything so clear. I've forgotten what I've started fighting for." I Can't Fight This Feeling. REO Speedwagon

Dean walked next door and knocked. He did it quickly so that he couldn’t change his mind. Benny would just judge him if he came back without talking to Castiel and Dean would hate himself. This had to be done. So many weeks had passed since the dance and Dean needed to apologize and hopefully admit his feelings. Maybe, just maybe, Cas would feel the same way.

Cas opened the door and Dean felt his heart speed up. He was wearing a light blue LMA shirt and semi-tight dark jeans with slightly tousled hair and was more gorgeous than Dean had remembered. His mouth dropped just a little and any rehearsed words he had got lost on his tongue. 

Dean’s mouth snapped shut when Cas’s curious gaze turned into a glare. At least he hadn’t slammed the door in his face so all hope wasn’t lost. 

“What do you want?” he snapped. 

Dean understood that he would still be pissed about what had happened before break. Although, Cas being pissed was possibly a good thing. Maybe he was mad that Dean didn’t kiss him and it didn’t matter that it was his cousin. Well, that probably didn’t help…

“Hey Cas,” Dean greeted, one side of his mouth curling up in an almost smile. Despite Cas being beyond mad, Dean was still glad to see him. Cas crossed his arms, still glaring. “I just want to talk. I need to apologize.”

“Oh,” Cas said. His glare got less intense but he kept his arms crossed. “Go ahead.”

“I, well… I messed up. Big time. I didn’t know Anna was your cousin,” Dean managed. 

Cas’s glare intensified again. Those words were clearly not the correct ones. 

“I mean… I shouldn’t have kissed her. At all,” Dean continued.

“Why not? Why would it be my business who you kiss?” Cas said angrily. 

Dean faltered a second. 

“Well, Benny thought and I hoped that maybe you liked me and that’s why you got mad when I kissed her,” he continued.

“That’s a little presumptuous, don’t you think?” Cas accused. Dean’s fear that Cas didn’t return his feelings came rushing back. The fear made him babble a little.

“Yes, it is,” Dean admitted, “I didn’t believe Benny at first. That’s why I came to find you, to apologize and to talk to you. On the night of the dance I checked here and Gabriel’s room. You weren’t in either and I didn’t know where else to find you.” 

“Where I was is not your concern,” Cas protested. 

“I know,” Dean said, pausing to regain his thoughts. This wasn’t going as planned. It was already hard enough for him to discuss his feelings and his words weren’t having the desired effect here. It was time to lay it all on the table then. 

Cas raised his eyebrows. Dean took a deep breath and continued. 

“I wanted to find you that night because I wanted to apologize for hurting you. I was scared and I used Anna to lie to myself and I’m sorry. It was selfish and I was scared. Scared of what you would say or the teachers or my father… and I should have just told you from the start. I should have told you how much I like you,” Dean said, pausing to make sure Cas heard the last part. 

His glare had softened into the admiring gaze Dean liked so much, the one that made him feel special and warm. It felt like he was the only thing that mattered when Cas looked at him like that. It looked like Cas wasn’t that mad after all. 

“I should have kissed you at the damn dance, Cas,” Dean admitted. 

Cas surged forward and grabbed fistfuls of Dean’s plaid shirt to pull him forward to crash their mouths together. Dean froze up, not believing it was happening, and then relaxed. He cupped Cas’s cheek and ran his other hand through his hair. 

There clearly wasn’t a lot of experience on Cas’s end, Dean didn’t know if there was any, but he certainly made up for it with enthusiasm. 

“Presumptuous, huh?” Dean said, taking a moment to breathe but still holding Cas close. 

“Maybe it was. It just so happens you were right. This time,” Cas teased. 

“This time?” 

Cas answered by kissing him again. He pulled him into his room and Dean kicked the door shut behind them. Castiel not so gracefully fell onto the bed, miscalculating where it was, and pulled Dean on top of him. 

They were laughing a little at their awkward fumbling but got back to kissing very quickly. As Dean moved to kiss down Cas’s jaw and neck, Cas reached up to push Dean’s flannel off and throw it on the floor, leaving him in a black t-shirt. Dean was gentle enough to not leave a mark, at least not this time he told himself, because he knew how Cas’s family was. There was no need to raise questions. 

Dean’s fingers lightly brushed the bit of skin exposed from Cas’s shirt riding up above his jeans. He didn’t want to do anything further since Cas was pretty new to all of this. They continued kissing for a while until Dean reluctantly climbed off of Cas to try to calm down since he was getting hard just from making out. There was no need to hurry anything. Cas sat up immediately. 

“Did I do something wrong?” he asked.

“Not at all, Cas. You’re great,” Dean replied.

“Then why did you stop? I like kissing you,” Cas said, scooting closer to press his side to Dean’s. 

“I like kissing you too but…” Dean paused. “Was that your first kiss?”

“That bad?” Cas asked, looking down at the floor. 

Dean cupped Cas’s face to pull him back up to look at him. 

“Not at all,” Dean assured him. He felt Cas relax. “I just don’t want to rush you.”

“I understand you have more experience but I think I can make those decisions on my own,” Cas argued. Dean had hoped that kissing meant no more arguing but that just wasn’t in either of them considering they were both incredibly stubborn. 

“Sure but…”

“Dean, I’m seventeen. I think I get a say in the matter.”

“What?”

That was news to Dean. 

“My birthday was Christmas Eve,” Cas explained. 

“You’re exactly a month before me then.”

Dean smiled before kissing Cas, slower and sweeter than before. He felt Cas sigh contently when he rested their foreheads together when he broke the kiss. 

“Happy birthday, Cas.”

“Thank you, Dean.”

They made out some more before deciding to just lie together in the tiny twin bed, curled towards each other. 

“I’ve wanted this for a long time, Dean.”

“Yeah? Why didn’t you ever do anything about it?” Dean kidded. 

“Well when I first met you, you were the most infuriating person I had ever met. With all of our fighting, I thought you hated me. I kind of hated you,” Cas explained. 

Dean squeezed Cas’s hand that he was holding as they shared a small laugh. This all still felt a little surreal and was a far cry from four months ago when they met. It was still a little bit of a mystery why Dean was so drawn to Cas but he couldn’t help it now he had him in his arms and it felt good. Hell, it felt great. 

“But when we stole the pie, you said you didn’t hate me but it still didn’t seem like you cared for me in this way,” Cas continued. 

“And then the dance…”

Cas nodded. 

“I figured for sure you didn’t like me when you kissed Anna. I went all break trying to hate you, like I kind of did in the first place, but I couldn’t.”

“I spent all break thinking you’d never want to talk to me again.”

“Luckily we were both wrong.”

Dean kissed Cas again, briefly. 

“Too bad we just didn’t talk that night. Where were you hiding?” Dean wanted to know. 

“I’ll show you sometime,” Cas answered with a mischievous glint in his eyes that Dean had never quite seen before but knew he liked immediately. Dean couldn’t wait to see that secret place and learn even more about Cas.

 

Dean stayed a little bit longer before deciding to go back to his own room to sleep. The twin bed situation wasn’t ideal for sleeping with someone else, in the most innocent sense of the term, but it had been great for a few hours of cuddling and making out. They had time, all the time they wanted, for that later. 

“There he is,” Benny grinned. 

“Shut up,” Dean grinned back. He had been doing so much smiling since he’d been back, his face hurt a little. There was no way he could be this happy but he was. It was a nice feeling. 

“I take it the apology went well,” Benny said, gesturing to the flannel Dean didn’t bother to put back on. 

“Very,” Dean replied, tossing the shirt on top of his dresser. He flopped on to his bed. 

“So are you guys going to be all gross and couple-y now?” Benny taunted.

“No. Come on, you know his family.”

“I do, unfortunately,” Benny shook his head sympathetically.

“So…” Dean started.

“My mouth is shut, I got it,” Benny said, with a wave of his hand like it didn’t need to be said. 

“Thanks, man,” Dean replied gratefully. 

Dean relaxed in his bed before dozing off, his mind consumed with just thoughts of Cas. They were mostly happy thoughts of his soft lips until he realized they didn’t talk about what this meant for them. Friends didn’t just make out with each other but they weren’t officially dating or anything. That would be a conversation for another time. 

It was true that Cas’s family, for the most part, would not be happy with whatever the two of them were now no matter what. They didn’t care for them being just friends. As far as Dean was considered, they could all piss off but Cas would care what they thought. They would just have to be careful no one caught them. 

~

 

The next morning, Dean was in such a good mood that he actually made his bed to perfection. Henriksen was at a loss for words, as was Benny. When Benny gave him a quizzical look, Dean just smiled and said they should hurry to breakfast. Dean knew Cas always beat them to the cafeteria and he couldn’t wait to see him. 

Benny shook his head with a smile. His roommate had become pathetic practically overnight. But, he figured, love did that to a person. 

At breakfast, Dean and Benny grabbed their food and sat at the usual table with Charlie, Cas and Garth. Dean sat next to Cas and was plenty close to him. Their knees were touching and he quickly squeezed their pinky fingers together before letting go. He wanted more but he had to settle for those simple touches considering they were in a crowded dining hall and Cas’s nosy cousins could be anywhere. Luckily for Dean, John was miles away so he had a lot more freedom but any teacher could still see. 

They shared stories of break as they ate. Charlie was talking to a girl named Gilda, unbeknownst to her unsupportive family, and Garth had plenty of crazy stories about fun girls and wacky adventures that Dean was surprisingly envious of. Well, the adventures anyways. Even if he and Cas hadn’t decided to be exclusive or anything, he honestly didn’t want to go find anyone else. That was new for Dean who had been more of a love em and leave em type in the past. It was slightly terrifying yet thrilling at the same time. 

After they ate, there was a little bit of time before class. Dean said he had to stop at the bathroom and gave Cas a pointed look. Cas, in return, gave him a confused look and an adorable head tilt. Benny laughed and led Charlie and Garth away. Dean could hear him say he would fill them in and he appreciated it. He wasn’t sure how to start that conversation with them so he was glad they would be on the same page without Dean having to do anything. He didn’t really want to go into any detail with his friends of his make-out session with his platoon leader. 

Dean grabbed Cas’s wrist and pulled him into the bathroom once their friends left them alone in the hallway and the coast was clear. 

“What…” Cas started to ask but Dean stopped him by kissing him. 

“Oh,” Cas smiled with understanding against Dean’s mouth. 

“I wanted to do that all morning,” Dean said before pulling Cas into another kiss.

Dean had Cas backed against the bathroom’s wall and slid a hand under his shirt to graze a hand over the smooth skin of his stomach and side.

“Dean…” Cas moaned into Dean’s mouth before licking inside, still mapping out his mouth. Dean kissed back just as enthusiastically, nipping and sucking Cas’s bottom lip. 

“We have to go to class,” Cas said breathlessly. Dean made a whining noise and kissed Cas again, a little roughly.

“I don’t want to,” he complained. He tried to pout to convince Cas. 

“I think Henriksen will notice if we skip class, Dean,” Cas said quietly, eyes still on Dean’s lips.

“Fine,” Dean smirked, “Another day. We’ll skip then.” 

Cas looked a little mortified at the prospect of skipping class and Dean laughed. 

“Come on,” Dean said, kissing Cas once more before they left the bathroom. 

The two of them froze when they walked out. Leaning on the wall opposite of the bathroom was Lucifer. 

“Hey little cousin,” he greeted. “Winchester.” 

Dean couldn’t remember ever hearing him speak before. It was chilling and matched the cold look in his eyes. There was no good reason for him to be lurking about and Dean’s stomach sank imagining what he could possibly want. 

“What do you want Lucifer?” Cas asked. 

Dean was fine letting Cas do all the talking. For some reason, Lucifer was scarier than Michael or Raphael. Maybe it was the name. Or his face suggesting he knew something they didn’t. Or both. 

“Oh nothing,” Lucifer drawled with a grin. “But when I do need something, you’ll help me.”

“Why the fu…” Dean started, angrily. 

“What are you talking about, Lucifer?” Cas said calmly, a hand on Dean’s chest to hold him back. The pressure was light but Dean got the point and stopped. 

“Because I know what just happened in that bathroom.”

Cas dropped his hand and swallowed, hard. Dean could tell this was bad if Cas was scared. 

“You wouldn’t dare,” Cas threatened. 

“Really? I wouldn’t tell my father? Or my brothers? They love a good story, Castiel.”

Dean and Cas could both tell by his face that he definitely would tell but only when it would serve in his best interest to use Dean and Cas to his advantage. Lucifer nodded at them before sauntering off down the hall like the arrogant prick he was. 

“We have to do something, to stop him,” Cas said, pleading eyes finding Dean’s. 

“Like what? He’s got us, he knows. But who gives a shit if he tells…”

“I do,” Cas replied angrily. 

“Look, I know it’s your family and family’s important but they’re all dicks and it doesn’t matter what they think,” Dean argued.

“Yes it does and until you have a large family dictating your every move, you cannot tell me how to act in this situation.”

It would be hard to have an intolerant family breathing down your neck constantly. Lying to everyone including yourself wasn’t a solution, Dean thought. Being your own person was the solution. 

That would be a fun conversation for later, Dean figured. Of course they already started butting heads. Maybe Dean was wrong to tell Cas what to do here but he hated how Cas’s family treated him. 

Cas turned on his heel and stormed off to Henriksen’s class. Dean followed and they were walking in to the classroom right when the bell rang.

“Good thing you’re on time, Novak. I would hate to be the teacher to give you your first demerit,” Henriksen said.

Dean snickered a little at the fact that Cas’s record was still clean after two and a half years and Dean’s was screwed to hell in his first four months. The kid was a perfect little angel before Dean got here. Oh, what he would give to see him peel potatoes…

“Something funny, Winchester?” Henriksen asked since Dean snickered again at the mental image.

“No,” Dean answered before he sat down next to Benny. He added the “sir” after the pointed look from the teacher. 

Cas was diagonally in front of him like on the first day. They weren’t fighting necessarily but they had argued so Dean wanted to make it up to him. Instead of throwing paper in his hair, he decided to risk throwing him a note. It was as close to an apology as he was going to get. After yesterday’s declaration of liking Cas, he was all tapped out in the emotional department. He showed the note to Benny before he threw it. His roommate rolled his eyes.

"Your lips look good after we make out," it read.

It was true. The usual pink shade of Castiel’s lips were darker and his bottom lip was a little swollen from Dean sucking and biting at it. It wasn’t obvious enough what they did but Dean liked that he could tell, that he marked Cas up just a little. Dean carefully watched Castiel read the note.

The blush on his cheeks must have been insane because it was reaching up his neck and ears and Dean could see it. Dean subtly pointed this out to Benny and they laughed softly. Cas scratched the back of his head with his middle finger to send a clear message. This made Dean and Benny laugh a little louder.

“Again with the laughter. I didn’t know I was such a comedian,” Henriksen said, stopping his lecture and the boys’ muffled chuckles who tried to turn them into coughing. 

“As I was saying…” Henriksen continued. 

Dean threw one more note that read “I can’t tell if your blushing is cute or hot. I’ll say both.”

Cas hid the note just in time under his notebook before Henriksen turned back around. Thank goodness for that because Dean did _not_ want Henriksen to know anything about them. 

“Novak, you feel okay? Your face is really red,” Henriksen pointed out. 

Several students turned around to look at Cas and Dean had to bite on a knuckle to keep from laughing out loud.

“I’m fine,” Cas managed. 

After a skeptical look, Henriksen turned around to write on the blackboard and Cas threw a note back. 

“You’re going to pay for this,” was all it read. Dean grinned and guessed that was only fair.


	11. Heat of the Moment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "One look from you and I would fall from grace, and that would wipe the smile right from my face. One thing led to another we were young..." Heat of the Moment, Asia.

After classes that day all of the students suffered through the late January cold to go for their usual run, the first of the new semester. Once inside the gym to finish their exercises, everyone was still jumping around and blowing on their hands to try to get warm. Dean did not miss this aspect of the school at all over break. 

“This sucks,” Dean said to no one in particular as they waited to start their other exercises. “Why the fuck do we go outside in this shit? Someone’s gonna get hypothermia.”

He was afraid that someone might be him since he was pretty sure he had lost feeling in at least two fingers.

Cas, if he heard him, ignored him for the first time. Dean wondered if he was being lenient since they made out a couple of times. He didn’t necessarily want special treatment because of what happened between them but he wouldn’t mind not doing push-ups. From Cas’s note in class, Dean was expecting some push-ups or something as payback for making him blush like crazy and Henriksen calling him out but it looked like that wouldn’t be the case. At least not yet. 

While Castiel ignored him, Raphael did not. 

“Winchester, give me thirty,” he commanded. 

Dean did them without complaint, at least no complaints out loud. A colorful string of insults passed through his mind but not out his mouth. The push-ups were more difficult than he would have hoped since he didn’t do any physical activity over break. 

After all of the exercises, Cas disappeared before Dean could talk to him. 

“What’s your deal, man?” Dean asked him when he sat next to him at dinner. He said it quietly so only Cas heard him. Everyone else at the table didn’t need to know their business.

“Me? I don’t have a deal,” Cas answered, feigning innocence. 

Dean didn’t bother to say that was bullshit and he let their other friends steer the conversation somewhere else. He wasn’t sure if Cas was pissed because of their argument after Lucifer cornered them or since Henriksen called him out in class for blushing. Maybe both.

 _That bastard_ , Dean thought. Sneaky little guy was probably planning something right now. 

He stabbed a carrot off his plate and ate it grumpily. It was weird since they were fighting but they weren’t. Dean didn’t know what to call it and the confusion was giving him a headache. It didn’t help that whatever they were now was still undefined but Dean didn’t really want to have that conversation. Plus, the anticipation of Cas’s revenge was killing Dean and if the sly look on Cas’s face was anything to go by, he knew that. 

After dinner, Dean had his study materials on his desk but was struggling to focus. Cas was the most distracting son of a…

“What’s up, Cas?” 

Dean’s thoughts were interrupted by Benny greeting Cas at their door. 

_Speak of the devil_ , Dean thought. 

“I need to borrow Dean,” Cas explained. There was that mischievous glint in his eyes again.

Before Dean could answer, Henriksen showed up at their door, too. 

“Novak, what are you doing?”

“I was wondering if it would be all right for Dean to study with me? He’s better at history than I am and we could work on our assignment together.”

“Sure,” Henriksen said, with a slightly doubtful look at Dean. “Keep him on track, Novak.”

“Yes, sir,” Cas answered. He gave Dean a prodding look. He proceeded to grab his stuff and followed Cas to his room. 

“Cas, what are you up to?” Dean asked with a wry grin. 

“As I told Henriksen, we’re working on our assignment,” Cas explained, walking into his room ahead of Dean.

“Sure,” Dean said, elongating the word suggestively. 

Cas didn’t say anything. Since he was a platoon leader, he had his own room so one of the desks was empty although his actual desk didn’t have a lot on it. Cas dragged his chair over so they could sit together, facing the door. Dean was between Cas and the wall. A quick panicked thought that he was trapped crossed his mind but he trusted Castiel, even with his promise of vengeance. They started working on the assignment as Henriksen paced through the hallway. Cas had his knee pressed to Dean’s which wasn’t helping his concentration. 

“Why do you keep looking at your watch?” Dean asked when Cas did it for the third time. 

He glanced at it again before leaning over to quickly kiss Dean. They broke apart just in time for Henriksen to walk by again. 

“You were timing him?” Dean whispered with a smirk. “You clever little…”

His words were swallowed by another kiss from Castiel, this one a lot more passionate. Cas reached his right hand across himself to place on Dean’s cheek and squeezed his knee with his other hand. 

Not a second too soon, Cas jumped back as Henriksen walked past. Cas left his hand on Dean’s knee and started sliding up inch by agonizing inch.

“Cas,” Dean breathed. 

The words on the page started to swim, blurring out of focus. The Cold War and the Soviet Union didn’t exactly matter when Cas had his hand on his thigh. 

Another heated kiss followed after Henriksen walked away from their door. Cas knew exactly how much time they had until he would be back so Dean let him take control. 

Cas’s hand finally reached between Dean’s legs and Dean almost flew out of his chair when Cas palmed his growing erection over his sweatpants.

“Fuck,” Dean cursed as his knee hit the desk. 

“Watch your mouth, Winchester,” Henriksen called from outside the room before he walked past the door. Luckily, he couldn’t see Cas’s hand.

“Yes, sir,” Dean said through gritted teeth. 

He cast a sideways glance at Cas who was just barely containing a laugh.

“Yeah, laugh it up man. Still not as funny as you in class, blushing like…”

Dean didn’t finish the sentence because his words turned to a moan as Cas rubbed his hand over his dick again. His breaths came in short, ragged pants. It didn’t help that Cas had just enough time before Henriksen’s return to gently suck on Dean’s neck, right over his rapid pulse. 

“Jesus, Cas. If this is your new method of payback I need to piss you off more. It’s better than you punching me.”

Cas didn’t say anything, just rubbed Dean with more determination while writing with his right hand. Dean blindly copied what Cas wrote since they had to keep up appearances that they were working. He didn’t even realize they had finished the assignment until Henriksen came back one more time and told Dean he could go back to his room now. With his eyes on his paper, Dean nodded.

“Winchester?” Henriksen snapped so Dean looked up. “You look kind of sweaty. Are you sick?”

“No sir,” Dean said, struggling to keep his voice level. Cas’s hand didn’t stop while Henriksen spoke.

He took his time gathering his stuff so Henriksen would walk away. He didn’t need him to see his very obvious erection. The teacher finally did but with a heavily skeptical look. 

Cas got out of his chair to let Dean get up and go back to his own room. 

“You’re an ass, you know that?” Dean said. “That’s some pretty cruel revenge. You sure you don’t want to help with this?”

Cas’s response was a quick kiss before suggesting, “No, that was the whole point. Maybe a shower would help?”

Dean laughed and shook his head before he left, a little shocked at how bold Cas had been. Now, they had both been a little embarrassed in front of Henriksen. Fair was fair. 

Benny had to laugh at Dean, all hot and bothered with a hard-on and quickly forming hickey on his neck.

“History gets you excited, huh?” he teased from his bed where he was reading. 

“Shut the fuck up, man. Like I’ve said before, do not piss off the nerd.” 

Benny laughed as Dean grabbed his towel and went to the bathroom. He took Cas’s advice and took care of his problem in the shower. He pictured Cas dipping his hand inside his sweatpants and maybe using his mouth…

It didn’t take long before Dean was coming over his hand, the other one covering his mouth so he didn’t say Cas’s name too loud.

 

Dean and Cas fell into a sort of routine of quick touches in the cafeteria when they sat next to each other on the long bench seat and kisses in a bathroom or Cas’s room. By the end of the week, Dean knew Cas wasn’t angry anymore about anything that had happened. 

Lucifer, however, remained a problem. 

Dean and Cas hadn’t been approached by him by again but he constantly looked at the two of them with a smug look that Dean wanted to punch off his face. Whenever Dean brought it up though, Cas just brushed it off. He didn’t want Lucifer to tell his family about him and Dean but he didn’t want to do anything about it either. 

“We just have to let him do what he wants. What are we supposed to do?” Cas sighed. 

“We don’t just roll over and take it!” Dean exclaimed. “How can you not care?”

“Dean, I do care. There’s just nothing we can do,” Cas said, sounding tired. “If Lucifer needs us to do something, we have to listen. I can’t have him running his mouth.”

Dean couldn’t imagine how exhausting it must be to deal with a large, controlling family but there was no way this was a lost cause. He said a short goodbye to Cas who protested Dean leaving but he claimed he was tired and left. 

“Benny, I need your help,” Dean said when he walked back into their room. 

“What do you need, brother?” Benny responded right away. 

“There’s a little problem I gotta take care of.”

Dean explained the issue on their way downstairs. He guessed correctly that Lucifer would be playing pool. Luckily, Michael and Raphael were nowhere to be seen. Those two kind of escaped his mind since he only thought of talking to Lucifer but the three of them were always a unit.

“Care to play a game?” Lucifer drawled, looking as arrogant as ever. 

“No. We need to talk,” Dean snapped. 

“Oh?” Lucifer replied, clearly amused. 

“You’re not going to tell anyone what you think you saw. You’re going to leave me and Cas alone,” Dean demanded. 

“Sure, sure,” Lucifer crossed his arms. “I have a counter offer. My brothers come back and we beat the snot out of you and your buddy here. We might not get along but we agree on one thing. You are trash and have no business with our cousin.”

Not a moment too soon, Michael and Raphael returned. 

“What do you want?” Michael asked, glaring at Dean like he was trying to smite him. 

“Nothing, I was just talking to your brother,” Dean tried. He knew three on two were horrible odds and while he’d had his fair share of unbalanced scuffs in the past, this one would definitely not end in his and Benny’s favor. 

“What’s on your neck? Is that a hickey?” Raphael observed. 

“I’m surprised he knows what one of those is,” Benny joked, earning a glare from Raphael and a snicker from Dean. 

“Yeah, it’s a hickey,” Dean admitted, though he wouldn’t dare say who from.

“If it’s from Anna…” Michael started threateningly. 

“No, it’s from your mom.”

He knew it was a low blow to go for the mom joke and the punch that connected with his cheek was pretty expected. Dean staggered backwards a couple steps and came back, ready to throw his own punch but Michael caught him off guard with another swift punch to his jaw. This one knocked him on his ass. 

Michael was on top of him and Dean could hear a struggle next to him and figured that Benny was starting to get into it with Raphael. 

Before Michael could punch again, he was pulled off of Dean. He sat up saw Cas pushing Michael away as Benny shoved Raphael back as well. 

“You three, get out of here,” Cas commanded in a low growl, a hard look in his eyes.

“You’re making a mistake, Castiel,” Michael said.

“I won’t ask again,” Cas responded in the same deep voice. 

His three cousins reluctantly sulked away with hate clearly etched on their faces. They had already risked their asses enough by fighting just a little and didn’t want to possibly lose their titles by getting in trouble. 

“Thanks, man… good time for you to grow a pair,” Dean managed, his face throbbing like a bitch.

“Shut up, Dean,” Cas snapped. 

_Great_ , Dean thought, _he’s pissed again._

Over Cas’s shoulder, Dean saw Benny shake his head before disappearing to the stairs and Dean didn’t blame him for bailing. He and Cas apparently needed to have a talk. Cas pulled Dean to his feet and roughly dragged him to the couches near the pool table. 

“Sit,” he bossed. Dean listened. 

Cas went over to the ice machine and wrapped some ice in paper towels from the bathroom. 

“Put this on,” he said. Dean listened again, wincing at the coldness against his face.

“Cas, I …” 

“Dean, what were you thinking?” Cas interrupted, still furious. He sat next to Dean on the couch.

“I wanted Lucifer to back off. I forgot the other two Stooges would be with him,” Dean said.

Cas tilted his head in confusion.

“The other two what?”

“Never mind,” Dean shook his head. “Cas, I’m sorry. I just want your family to leave us alone if they can’t accept you.”

“Let me deal with them.”

“Well, we’re kind of in this together.”

“I know but…”

“But what? Because it’s me? I get I’m not some rich snobby…”

“That’s not what this is about, Dean,” Cas reasoned. 

“Then what?” Dean asked in a harsh tone. 

“I don’t want you to get hurt,” Cas explained, affection replacing anger in his eyes. 

“What if they hurt you?” Dean asked gently. 

“I’m still their family. They won’t hurt me.”

Dean was doubtful but had to trust Cas even if he didn’t trust the rest of his family. Those douchebags only took family loyalty so far. Betrayal, in their eyes, was the worst thing for one of their own and they saw Castiel as deserting them even though he never stopped caring about them in his own way. Dean couldn’t believe Cas was willing to lose everything just for him.

He stole a quick kiss as he continued to ice his face. 

 

Dean’s birthday was the next day and luckily, a Saturday. He, Cas and their friends were all cleared to go into town and planned to get Dean a burger at the diner he liked so much. Castiel had been sure to let Benny, Charlie and Garth know when Dean’s birthday was after he let slip it was a month after Cas’s. 

It wasn’t too cold and the sun was out, a nice day for Kansas in late January. Dean was smiling as they walked to the dinner. He hadn’t a birthday this nice in… well, ever. Usually, Sam was the only one who remembered and there was only so much a kid could do. Bobby would sometimes mail him something and Dean appreciated it but he generally just didn’t do birthdays. 

“What are you smiling about?” Cas asked, walking close to Dean so only he could hear. 

“Just happy,” Dean turned to smile at Cas who quickly squeezed his hand. 

It went against what Dean was used to but he wanted to hold Cas’s hand as they walked, not just a quick squeeze. He wanted everyone to know they were whatever they were. Most of all, he wanted his dad to accept him and then he could meet Cas and so could Sam. 

They got to the diner and Dean’s mind was cleared at the prospect of a delicious burger. He sat down on the same side of the large booth as Cas across from Benny, Garth and Charlie. Under the table, Dean held Cas’s hand and saw a side of his mouth quirk up in a little smile. 

Their food came and Dean dove right into his burger and fries which unfortunately meant he had to let go of Cas. It was perfect and a small moan escaped his lips and he could feel Cas’s eyes on him so he did it again as he chewed. 

“All right, it’s not that good,” Benny teased. 

“Yes it is,” Dean said with a mouthful of burger. 

“Ew,” Charlie joked, crinkling her nose at his bad manners.

Cas pushed his foot against Dean’s who was grateful for the continued contact. It was a little ridiculous how much he wanted to touch Cas and have Cas touch him, even just little touches like this. 

After they ate, they walked around a little. Since it was Dean’s birthday, they went into the record store without complaint. There was a cool AC/DC poster that was new since the last time Dean had been in the shop. He only eye-balled it though since he didn’t really have the money. The fake credit card that he took from John had been declined once and he was too scared to use it again.

They walked back to the school and Cas invited Dean to his room and they split from the rest of their friends and sat on his bed after they threw their coats off and kicked off their shoes.

“How about I get you that poster next weekend?” Cas offered. It was still a mystery why Cas cared so much and it was still new to Dean.

“Come on man, you don’t have to do that,” Dean protested. Presents made what they were more real. If they became something more, Dean was afraid he would fuck it up and he couldn’t lose Cas.

“I know I don’t. I want to,” Cas argued. 

“Why? I’m nothing special.”

“You are to me.” 

There was that look again, the affectionate gaze that made Dean’s heart race. There wasn’t too much time to admire it because Cas’s mouth was on his seconds later. 

Dean kissed back earnestly and let Cas guide him on his back so he was laying with Cas on top of him. Cas moved his hips, seemingly without thinking about it, and Dean couldn’t help the moan that escaped his mouth. As he threw his head back, Cas took the opportunity to give him a larger hickey than the last one.

“Cas,” Dean groaned, “you’re driving me nuts.”

“Don’t worry,” Cas said into Dean’s ear, “that feeling is very mutual.” 

Cas continued to move his hips against Dean, driving all the blood Dean had south but he could feel that Cas was having the same reaction. Dean had both of his hands on Cas’s face who slid his hands under Dean’s shirt to work it off. Cas threw his own on the floor and was running his hands up Dean’s chest who stopped him.

“Cas, hey, are you sure you’re not going too fast here?

“I told you before, I wanted you for a long time and I can make my own decisions. I want to make you feel good,” Cas answered in a low voice. “It is your birthday after all.”

Well, Dean couldn’t argue with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com


	12. We Can Work It Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Life is very short and there's no time for fussing and fighting my friend. I've always thought that it's a crime so I will ask you once again. Try to see it my way, only time will tell if I am right or I am wrong." We Can Work It Out, The Beatles.

Dean had woken up still in Cas’s bed the following morning. It was a Sunday so there were no room inspections or obligations. He had quietly untangled himself from Cas’s arms and put his clothes back on since he slept in only his boxers. Then he snuck outside for a smoke. It was earlier than he normally woke up on a Sunday, which sucked, and he needed the solitude. 

He leaned against his usual wall of the dorm building and was there long enough that he eventually lit a second cigarette. There was no doubt in his mind that he had left Castiel earlier that morning because he had panicked. In all honesty, it had freaked him out to wake up cuddling. It was new for him and he didn’t know how he felt about it.

 _Fuck_ , Dean thought. His mind was racing as he thought about the night before. He had an amazing birthday dinner with his friends with that delicious burger and then…

He raised the hand with his smoke to inhale and saw it was shaking a little. Cas and he had already crossed the “just friends” border since they started kissing but last night solidified that. They couldn’t go back now. Not after what happened. 

Dean closed his eyes as he remembered being stripped slowly and kissed all over by Cas. The adoration and intimacy as Cas practically worshipped him before sucking him off was unbelievable. Well, the whole night had been unbelievable. With Dean’s help, Cas was a quick learner and very enthusiastic. In Dean’s young life, he hadn’t received many blowjobs but that was definitely the best one. Those perfectly pink lips of Cas’s were seemingly made for it and maybe it was so great because of who was giving it. 

_Shit_ , Dean cursed to himself. That was dangerous thinking.

Castiel meant a lot to Dean, sure, but waking up cuddling wasn’t something Dean was used to and he didn’t expect to like it so much. It had been nice but what if Cas didn’t think so? Everything had kind of happened so fast with them. Their first kiss was only last week and Dean wasn’t sure how Cas felt since he had bolted that morning. He groaned inwardly and stomped out his cigarette. He didn’t really want to have a touchy-feely conversation but actually caring about someone who did something like that for him kind of deserved a talk. 

“Hello, Dean.”

The voice came from Dean’s right and startled him a little. 

“Oh, hey Cas,” Dean answered, struggling to meet Cas’s eyes.

“I figured I could find you out here. Is everything all right?” Cas asked.

“Yeah, fine,” Dean responded dismissively. 

“I know you usually come here when you are upset or…”

“I’m fine,” Dean repeated with a slight snap to his words. 

Truthfully, he wasn’t fine but he didn’t know how to voice what he felt to Cas. He didn’t want to have some emotional heart-to-heart and scare him off by being clingy or something like that. For all he knew, Cas was just pretending to like him or didn’t like him as much. 

Dean didn’t bother to ask what Cas had thought about them waking up cuddling together or talk about what had happened last night. It was a good opportunity but Dean wasn’t sure if he would like what Cas said so he bailed. Again. 

“I’m going to head inside. I’ll, uh, see you around,” Dean mumbled before ducking inside, leaving a more than confused Castiel behind. 

 

Dean tried to be quiet when he walked back into his room but he ended waking Benny up anyways. He rolled over in his bed and grunted something that sounded like a greeting. 

“Wh…what time is it?” Benny grumbled.

“Like ten,” Dean answered, surprised Benny slept so late. 

Benny considered what Dean said and blinked a couple times. 

“Why are you up so early?” Benny asked. 

“I, uh…”

Benny glanced at Dean’s bed that was in the same state he left it yesterday morning and his same clothes as yesterday, a now wrinkled Led Zeppelin shirt with jeans.

“You didn’t sleep here last night, did you?” Benny teased with a grin. 

Dean felt his cheeks get red at his friend’s prodding. Benny let out a deep laugh.

“Well, props to you brother,” Benny commended. “Are you guys boyfriends now?”

“No,” Dean answered quickly. Maybe too quickly.

Benny raised his eyebrows and Dean let out a heavy sigh.

“It’s a little complicated right now, okay?”

“Clearly there’s some crap you need to talk to him about,” Benny said with a shrug.

“Whatever. I’m going to go take a shower,” Dean answered. 

He grabbed a towel and walked out of their room to the bathroom, hoping for a distraction. After it was hot almost to the point of almost uncomfortable, he stepped in. Benny was right, Dean would have to stop being a coward and talk to Cas soon. 

 

Monday morning dawned unfortunately early and way before Dean was ready to face the day. He avoided Castiel the rest of yesterday and wasn’t looking forward to seeing him today because he knew what would happen. Cas would pester him about what was wrong with his concerned and furrowed eyebrows and ask what was wrong when Dean hadn’t quite put a finger on it himself.

That was exactly what happened. 

“Are you all right?” 

Dean turned to him as they ate and he was right, Cas made the face he knew he would. 

“I’m fine,” Dean answered, stabbing a sausage link. 

“Really? Because…”

“Seriously, man. I’m fine,” Dean continued to eat. 

Cas let it go but Dean knew the conversation wasn’t over. 

“We can talk later, okay?” Dean gave in. Cas didn’t answer. A cafeteria in front of their friends and everyone else was not the place. That and Dean didn’t to wrap his head around what to say. 

Through the day, Dean didn’t ignore Cas but he didn’t really talk to him either. Benny wasn’t the only one who noticed something was wrong. In one class that was just Dean and Charlie, she brought it up. 

“What’s going with you and Cas today? Everything seemed like sunshine and rainbows on Saturday,” she said.

“It’s… a little complicated. Working through stuff or whatever,” Dean replied. 

She wasn’t wrong, everything was great on Saturday. Then things went south when Dean had thought about everything too much and been a dick when he panicked. 

“Like what stuff?” she pried. 

“Just stuff,” Dean said. His tone was definitive enough that Charlie dropped it. 

He knew taking it out on his friends was crappy but he just needed to pinpoint what the hell was wrong and why he was such a chicken shit. Then he could talk to Cas and they could figure this mess out. Once that was taken care of, he owed his friends an apology for being so short with them.

 

Outside for their exercises, they lined up to go for a run like usual. The workout actually helped clear Dean’s mind for a bit which he was grateful for. He finished before Benny and beat him into the gym for the other exercises. 

“Ha, beat you. How’s that feel?” Dean joked with a grin. 

Benny gave him a pointed look to stop talking but it was too late. 

“Winchester, twenty pushups,” Cas demanded. 

“Aw Cas, come on,” Dean protested. He tried to give him a pleading puppy dog eyes look that always worked for Sam but Cas looked pissed and wasn’t going to give in. 

“Twenty,” Cas repeated sternly. 

“Look, just because…”

Dean was going to go mention how he shouldn’t be singled out because the crap between them but didn’t have a chance before Raphael was interrupting. 

“Novak, what’s the problem?” 

“Nothing I can’t handle,” Cas replied without looking at Raphael. 

“Right,” Raphael scoffed, “take care of your platoon members or I will.”

He glared before stomping to the front of the entire company. Once there, he looked at Cas to see if they could start so he looked at Dean.

“Dean, do your pushups,” he said. 

It was quiet so only Dean could hear it. He opened his mouth to protest but figured he had been a big enough dick to Cas that day. Reluctantly, he did them. The company continued once he was done. 

 

Once the exercises were done, everyone went back to the dorm buildings before dinner. In an effort to further avoid Cas and the talk they needed, he stood outside to grab a smoke. 

“You know, if you’re trying to hide you should pick a spot I don’t know about,” Cas said as Dean lit up. It wasn’t a surprise for Cas to appear and Dean wasn’t fazed.

“I should find that spot you still haven’t told me about, where you hid after the dance?” Dean retorted, blowing smoke out into the cold night and away from Cas. 

“Don’t change the subject,” Cas said firmly. 

“Fine,” Dean answered. He looked Cas in the eyes and let him start. Apparently, they were going to talk now. 

“Why have you been avoiding me?” Cas asked, directly to the point. 

“What do you mean? I saw you a bunch today and was just tired yesterday,” Dean lied. 

“You know what I mean,” Cas took a step closer.

Dean continued to smoke, not really sure what to say. 

“I think I get it,” Cas said. Dean raised his eyebrows as invitation to continue. “You got scared.”

“Really?” Dean smirked. “Scared of what?” 

“Scared of what’s happening with us. You can’t handle how real it’s gotten.”

“How real?” Dean repeated skeptically. 

He paused, inhaled and blew out. 

“So what, you want to be boyfriends or something?” Dean joked, dismissing the seriousness of the conversation. Maybe because Cas was right. 

“I want you to stop pretending you don’t care about me,” Cas said angrily. 

Dean looked down. That was how he was acting and it wasn’t fair to either of them since he did care. A lot. Which was the scary part.

“And yes,” Cas continued, “boyfriends would be nice.” 

“I…what? You’re serious?” Dean stammered in reply, looking up to meet Cas’s eyes. The tone of the conversation had changed dramatically. 

“Of course.”

“Why?” Dean asked, not grasping why Cas would want to do something so stupid as date him. 

“Last week when we kissed I didn’t get a chance to say that I like you a lot too. Despite what you may think about yourself, I find you to be rather amazing Dean Winchester.”

Dean scoffed a little. He had never been called amazing and he wasn’t sure if it suited him. His father wasn’t big on praise and God forbid if he saw his son now, knew what this boy in front of him meant to him. Fists and slurs would be flying so fast, like when John caught him with a guy once before, it would make Dean’s head spin. 

After he took one last inhale on his cigarette, he put it out under his boot. 

“You are,” Cas said. 

He lifted Dean’s head with a gentle hand under his chin, driving all negative thoughts out. There was only a moment of hesitation for Cas to admire Dean and give him a second to stop him if he wanted to before he kissed him, slow and sweet. It was brief since they had somewhere to be. 

“Let’s go to dinner, Dean,” Cas said, taking Dean by the hand to lead him to the cafeteria. Dean squeezed his hand in response. 

“So,” Dean cleared his throat. “How about, uh, we go to that diner on Saturday? Just us?” 

“It’s a date,” Cas smiled. Dean returned the smile. That talk ended a lot better than he could have hoped and it was a huge weight off his shoulders. 

 

Everything went well for almost the rest of the week. Dean and Cas were back to shy touches and heated kisses when they could get them throughout the day or night. It was hard to do but Dean remained on his best behavior to not jeopardize his date with Cas. 

On Friday morning, Dean pulled Cas into the bathroom closest to their history class like usual to kiss him breathless. Cas checked his watch and they reluctantly left the room, hair tousled and lips swollen. 

“You weren’t kidding.”

It was a harsh voice and one they both knew too well. Dean and Cas turned around to find Raphael, Lucifer and Michael walking towards them. Raphael and Michael had matching scowls. Dean’s stomach dropped at the sight.

“You know how I love to be right,” Lucifer said with a cold grin. 

“This can’t be real,” Raphael protested.

“What can’t?” Dean interjected, hoping they meant something else besides what Dean feared. He could feel Cas tense beside him. 

“You two. Seriously, Castiel? You have let him corrupt you this far?” Michael said.

“Dean didn’t do anything wrong, Michael. Just walk away,” Cas argued. 

“You know we can’t do that,” Raphael said. 

“What, you’re going to tell your big, scary dad?” Dean goaded, stepping forward. “Then what?”

“He tosses you out and gets our cousin the help he needs,” Michael spat, stepping forward to be face to face with Dean. 

“Help? You three are the ones who need help, not Cas,” Dean snapped. It was unbelievable how stupid these three were. 

“Dean, please…” Cas pleaded, grabbing Dean’s arm. 

“No, you know what? Fuck these three assclowns. Forget them, Cas,” Dean turned to Cas. 

Dean tried to put everything he couldn’t say into words into a look. He needed Cas to understand that he cared about him and that these three, while blood, weren’t family. 

Cas looked to his cousins and back at Dean. 

“Let’s go, Dean,” he turned to go down the hallway. Dean followed. 

It was the last straw for Cas’s cousins who shoved Dean and Cas from behind. They were hard shoves but they didn’t fall. They both whirled around and Dean punched Michael in the face. Cas followed his lead and punched Raphael. On the side, Lucifer grinned wickedly since this was what he wanted. Any fight, even between his own family, was good to him. 

Dean got hit on the side of his mouth and could taste blood and swung back. He stole a glance and saw Cas holding his own. 

“Hey, hey!” Henriksen called from down the hall. Immediately, they all took a step back in varying states of disarray. “Milton’s office, all of you. Now.”

“Technically, I didn’t hit anyone,” Lucifer tried. 

One look from Henriksen and he joined everyone else as they were led out of the academic building. It was a silent march to the administration building where Zachariah’s office was. 

Henriksen knocked with all five boys behind him. 

“Fighting, sir,” Henriksen said, making it as simple as possible. “All of them.”

“Thank you, Henriksen,” Zachariah dismissed. “Winchester, Novak. Sit.”

Henriksen walked away while Dean and Cas sat down in the office. Zachariah walked out of his office and shut the door behind him to face his boys. 

“How deep of shit do you think we’re in?” Dean asked.

Cas looked a little shell-shocked. 

“Dean. I’ve never been in trouble before.”

“It’s fine, Cas. What’s he going to do, kick you out?” Dean joked. Cas’s eyes got even bigger. 

“What if he does?” Cas exclaimed, dropping his head in his hands. 

“Oh, come on. I was kidding, man. You’re his nephew! That’s got to count for something,” Dean tried. 

He reached a hand out to rub soothing circles between Cas’s shoulder blades. If Zachariah’s yelling was anything to go by, family didn’t mean much to him. Well, maybe perfect and rule following family mattered. He was really tearing into his own sons and Dean would have laughed except he knew the same thing was about to happen to him and Cas. 

The yelling stopped outside and the door to the office flew open. Dean pulled his hand back from Cas’s back who sat up straight immediately. Zachariah slammed the door shut and sat behind his desk. 

“Novak, you want to tell me what happened?” Zachariah asked angrily. 

“The three of them attacked us, unprovoked, while we went to history class, sir,” Cas said. 

Dean sat quietly as Zachariah considered what his nephew said. It wasn’t a lie since the attack was pretty much uncalled for and they kind of started it. The mystery was what the others said happened. 

“Your cousins tell me a slightly different story. Did you two throw the first punches?”

“Yes sir, but…” Cas started. 

“I thought so. Winchester, anything to say?”

“What’s the point?” he shrugged since he knew Zachariah wouldn’t believe him or care what he said. Zachariah lifted his eyebrows at his response. 

“I will be writing to your father, Castiel,” Zachariah said.

Cas nodded and looked at the ground. 

“And I will be calling yours, Winchester,” he continued. 

“Good luck with that. Let me know if you catch him sober,” Dean joked and cracked a grin.

“Detention. Both of you. And you’re not going into town this weekend,” Zachariah replied in a harsh tone.

“Let me guess. Your kids are off free?” Dean pressed, knowing it was stupid. He couldn’t help it though. He was pissed he wouldn’t get to finally go on a legitimate date with Cas after he had been man enough to ask. 

“Watch it, Winchester.”

“It’s bullshit and you know it,” Dean kept going, anger fueling him. 

“That’s another detention,” Zachariah snapped. “Anything else?”

Dean bit his tongue, figuring he had gone far enough. 

“You’re dismissed.”

Dean and Cas got up and Dean had his hand on the door when Zachariah spoke again. 

“If what your cousins say is true about this relationship between you two, Castiel…”

Zachariah looked back and forth between them. Cas shifted uneasily from one foot to the other.

“Well, I hope they’re wrong. Got it?”

“Yes sir,” Cas said quietly. 

Dean opened his mouth to say something back but didn’t get a chance because Cas dragged him out of the office into the overly bright hallway. 

“You always have to open your mouth, don’t you?” Cas snapped when the door was shut behind them. 

Dean didn’t get a chance to say anything again because Cas pressed him against the wall and kissed him. Considering Dean thought Cas was going to yell at him, this was the much better alternative. It was pretty bold since Zachariah had just threatened them if he knew their relationship was real and not just rumors from his sons to do this outside of his office. 

“You think it’s hot when I talk back, that’s why,” Dean grinned against Cas’s mouth.

“It’s infuriating,” Cas replied. 

“Good enough,” Dean laughed and pulled Cas back into a kiss.


	13. I Feel Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Baby says she's mine you know, she tells me all the time you know, she said so. I'm in love with her and I feel fine." I Feel Fine, The Beatles.

“You’re not pissed, right?”

“What do you mean?” Cas asked, eyebrows furrowed. 

“I’m just making sure you’re not pissed we can’t go on our date,” Dean answered. 

The two of them ate across from each other in the cafeteria with everyone else who couldn’t or didn’t want to go into town that day. Charlie, Benny and Garth opted to go without them and so did Gabriel who wanted to see Kali. Luckily, Cas’s douchebag cousins were nowhere to be seen. Dean was already in a pretty bad mood and didn’t want to deal with them. 

“We both got in that fight so it wouldn’t be fair for me to be angry at you,” Cas replied. 

“Just making sure,” Dean said, looking at his food. 

“You seem upset,” Cas observed. 

“Well we were finally going to go on a date, you know? It just sucks,” Dean grumbled. 

“There’s always next week.”

Dean shrugged. He had really been looking forward to their date and he felt like he had let Cas down. Even if Cas didn’t seem upset, which Dean was grateful for, Dean wanted to make it up to him. 

This was part of the reason why he had been hesitant about dating Cas in the first place. He knew he would mess it up, it was just a matter of time. Unfortunately, that seemed to be happening sooner rather than later. 

 

For the most part, the trio of assholes had backed off since Zachariah had yelled at them so Dean could try to be on his best behavior. However, it turned out that the next weekend was no good for a date either because Dean ended up getting another couple of detentions late in the week. Not only was Raphael being a dick to Dean and Cas during exercises, which they could handle, he started picking on Benny and Charlie as well. Dean wasn’t going to have two of his closest friends dragged into the mess with Cas’s family so he kept telling Raphael to shove it. 

Both times when the tough guy thought he could stop the whole company just to make Benny or Charlie do push-ups or run extra laps for no reason, Dean stepped in and told him to fuck off. This led to a shouting match and a very near physical altercation before a teacher stepped in and punished Dean for being insubordinate when he talked back. It wasn’t fair that Raphael got off of without a detention but Dean understood how this school worked even if he didn’t like it. 

Now, Castiel was pissed. 

“I don’t get why you can’t ever let it go when it comes to them,” Cas protested angrily. 

They were in the library on a night in early February with Benny, Charlie and Garth. Gabriel said he felt like doing his homework in his own room. It appeared that their date would have to be pushed back again. 

“Because I’m not going to let him boss everyone around just because he can’t handle who you are, okay?” Dean argued, now just as angry as Cas. 

“We can stick up for ourselves, you know,” Charlie chimed in. 

Benny nodded in agreement. Garth, honestly, looked torn between who to listen to.

“I know that, Charlie. I do,” Dean agreed. “But Raphael has a problem with us so he can come deal with us and not drag you guys in just because he knows it will piss me off.”

Cas set his mouth in a hard line and looked like he wanted to argue more but didn’t say anything. 

Later, Cas explained himself a little better. 

“I’m not pissed at you, Dean. I guess I’m just pissed in general.”

They were in Cas’s room, sitting on his bed, but Dean wasn’t going to stay long because Henriksen would be coming along for lights out any minute. Even if Zachariah had his suspicions from his sons that something was going on with Dean and Cas didn’t mean that they wanted to give him definitive proof. 

“I’m pissed my family is so bigoted, towards both of us,” Cas continued, “but I can’t blame you for being protective of our friends. It’s one of the many things that I like about you.”

Dean knew it was silly but he got a little excited at Cas saying “our” friends. It made him happy and so did the liking part. That was nice too. 

“And I’m pissed we haven’t gone on a date yet.”

“How about next weekend?” Dean suggested. “I promise to behave until then, no matter what.”

“No matter what?” Cas smiled. 

“Yes,” Dean agreed. “I can ignore your cousins if it means I can take you out on a date.”

He leaned over to put a hand on Cas’s cheek and kissed him. 

“You do realize next Saturday is Valentine’s Day, right?” Cas said, after he broke the kiss. 

Dean froze and his face must have conveyed his panic. 

“We can wait until the Saturday after if you want, just go out with everyone else next week,” Cas said, looking away from Dean. The disappointment was obvious. 

“No,” Dean said firmly. He stroked a thumb on Cas’s cheek. “I would love to go out with you on Valentine’s Day.”

They kissed again before Cas’s watch let them know Henriksen would be showing up at any moment and Dean went to his own room. 

 

“Would you calm down?” Charlie demanded. “Please?”

“I can’t,” Dean let out a huge sigh. 

“Yes, you can. It’s just a date,” she said with an eye roll.

“Yeah. On Valentine’s Day,” Dean panicked, flopping back on his bed. 

Charlie was helping him get ready and Dean was in a slight state of panic. 

“Seriously? Still?” Benny said. Dean hadn’t even heard him come back in. 

“Yes. Still,” Dean mumbled. He had been more than a little freaked out all week. 

“I think it’s cute,” she said before adding “although somewhat annoying” under her breath. 

“Heard that,” Dean snapped while Benny laughed. 

“Good. Now just wear the green Henley and jeans, okay?” she insisted. “I gotta go. Good luck.”

She patted him on the knee and left the room. 

“I never thought you could be so dramatic, brother,” Benny joked, plopping onto his own bed. 

“Shut up,” Dean said, sitting up to get dressed. “I don’t want to mess this up.”

“And what you’re wearing is going to do that?” Benny pointed out. 

Dean didn’t answer since he knew Benny was right. He got dressed and went to brush his teeth. When he came back, he grabbed his leather jacket and got a “good luck” from Benny. 

He went next door to knock on Cas’s door. He answered almost immediately since he had probably heard Dean leave his own room.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas greeted. 

“Hey Cas,” Dean answered, lips pulling into a shy smile. 

He ran his tongue over his bottom lip without thinking about it as he looked at Cas who was wearing a red hoodie and jeans. It wasn’t much but he was so used to him in the school’s uniform or t-shirt that he looked really good just by wearing something else, even though he looked good in the school stuff too. 

“Is everything okay?” he asked. 

“What?” Dean asked. “Oh. Yeah, everything’s g… you look…um. Good.” 

Cas smiled at Dean’s stammering. 

“Thanks. You look good, too.”

“Thanks,” Dean smiled in response, running a hand through the back of his hair. “Should we go?”

“Sure.” 

The two walked into town, not saying much. They were almost there when Cas spoke up.

“Is it normal to feel nervous?” Cas asked.

“Um, I’m not really sure. I haven’t actually gone on a date before,” Dean admitted.

“Oh,” Cas said. “But you…”

“Well, yeah. I’ve done other stuff but…”

“I understand,” Cas nodded, “It just seems weird to be nervous since we’ve kissed and my mouth’s been around your…”

“Right, yeah,” Dean cut him off with wide eyes and deep blush. They happened to pass by an elderly couple at the exact wrong moment who both looked thoroughly scandalized. 

“Did I say something wrong?” Cas asked. “I thought you liked when I did that.”

“I did Cas, a lot. Trust me. But maybe don’t bring it up in public?” Dean suggested. 

“Okay,” Cas said in a small voice, looking away from Dean. 

“Hey,” Dean said, stopping them outside the diner and catching Cas’s eyes. “It’s okay. Really. That kind of stuff is special to us, that’s all. It doesn’t need to be broadcasted.” 

Cas nodded.

“And hey, if this goes your way maybe I’ll repay the favor later,” Dean winked, regaining his usual confidence. 

Cas smiled at that with a small shake of his head and led Dean into the diner. 

They sat at a table across from each other and both ordered a burger.

“Copycat,” Dean joked. 

Cas wrinkled his nose at him in response but with a smile. 

_This guy will be the death of me_ , Dean thought with adoration and an overwhelming urge to kiss him. For someone that Dean knew could kick ass, he had firsthand knowledge of that, he could also be ridiculously adorable. Not that he would ever say that out loud. 

“Tell me more about your brother,” Cas asked. By now, he knew that Dean’s parents were a touchy subject so he stuck to the kid brother he knew Dean loved. 

“Sammy? The kid’s a genius. He definitely got all the smart genes in the family and definitely not from our dad so our mom….” Dean paused, his eyes going blank a second before he went on to something else, “He had a friend he liked, named Jess. I hope he still talks to her.”

“He sounds great, Dean. I hope I can meet him,” Cas said, gently grabbing Dean’s hand across the table. Dean felt a pleasant twist of his stomach in excitement. It wasn’t a big deal but Dean really liked holding Cas’s hand. 

“Me too,” Dean agreed, squeezing Cas’s hand. 

He didn’t add that it was only a slight possibility since meeting Sam would mean possibly meeting John and that was a bad idea. 

“And you already know about my family,” Cas said.

“True. Well, what do you like to do outside of school?” Dean asked as their food came. The waitress smiled sweetly when she saw they were on a date. 

They talked about some books and how Cas liked reading a lot and writing occasionally. Cas explained that he wanted to major in English if he went to college but there wasn’t a large chance of that happening.

“Why not?” Dean asked. 

“My family expects me to join the military.”

It was hard not to say anything harsh against that so Dean took a bite of his burger. The topic turned to movies so Dean didn’t start an argument and it turned out that Cas hadn’t seen a lot of Dean’s favorites. 

“Not even Star Wars?” 

Cas shook his head. 

“We’ll have to watch them then.”

They both smiled at the promise of hanging out more and it kept Dean warm as they stepped out into the cold, holding hands. Dean had paid and Cas had tried to protest but Dean insisted since he had a successful week of playing pool in the lobby. A lot of kids kept coming back to play and Dean kept gladly taking their money. 

Not a lot of their fellow classmates, particularly not Cas’s family, were walking around so Dean figured it was okay to keep holding Cas’s hand while they walked. If the small smile on Cas’s face was anything to go by, it was a good idea. 

Cas pulled Dean into the record store and decided he wanted to buy Dean the AC/DC poster he had been eyeing on his birthday. 

“Cas, come on. You don’t have to. Honestly,” Dean protested grumpily. 

“You bought me dinner,” Cas argued. 

Dean groaned in frustration. They were both so stubborn.

“This is for both your birthday and Valentine’s Day. Now shush,” Cas said with finality. 

Dean knew he wasn’t going to convince Cas otherwise so he let him buy it for him.

“Why can’t you let me do something nice for you, Dean?” Cas prodded. 

They walked out of the store, hand-in-hand, with Dean holding his new poster.

“I don’t know. I guess nice things don’t usually happen to me,” Dean said, looking down. 

“Well, they do now,” Cas insisted. “Okay?” 

Dean, again knowing Cas wasn’t going to budge on this, nodded.

“I’m serious, Dean,” Cas said firmly, “I don’t have experience with dating but I’m pretty sure it means I get to do nice things for you. All the time if I want to.”

“Fine,” Dean grumbled. 

That actually sounded very awesome, even if he didn’t admit that out loud. He couldn’t think of the last time someone did something nice for him. Maybe when Sam got him his favorite necklace he never took off a few years ago.

Cas lifted their hands to kiss the back of Dean’s which made him blush and Cas laugh. 

When they got back to the school, the two of them went to Dean’s room so he could hang up the poster. 

“Nice,” Benny approved. 

“Right?” Dean said, beaming at Cas who smiled back. 

“Don’t be keeping me up all night, you hear? I need my beauty rest,” Benny teased. 

“Yes you do,” Dean teased back. 

Cas looked a little confused what Benny meant. Dean took his hand and led him next door. 

“Why would Benny think we’re going to keep him up all night?” Cas asked when his door was shut behind them. They both kicked off their shoes. 

Dean kissed him and hoped he could figure it out. 

“Oh,” Cas smiled against his mouth. “I understand.”

“I believe I owe you a favor,” Dean winked. 

Cas nodded, his mouth in an “O.” Dean gently guided Cas to the bed and let him get comfortable before crawling on top of him. He kissed him sweetly on the lips before kissing down his jaw and sucking on his neck. Their secret was out enough that Dean kept going until he knew there would be a mark. 

While Cas was moaning and running his hands through Dean’s hair and down his back, Dean slipped his hands under his shirt to work it off. Last time they had been like this, Cas had stayed clothed so Dean took the time to admire his boyfriend as best he could in the dark, sliding his hands up his sides and then down his chest. Cas arched his back, grinding their growing erections together, as Dean flicked a tongue over his nipple. 

“Fuck,” Cas groaned. “Hurry up, you’re killing me.”

“I’m just doing what you did,” Dean said, as innocently as possible.

He kissed down Cas’s stomach and stopped above his jeans, sucking a mark onto the sharp hip bone. As agonizingly slow as he could possibly do it, Dean undid Cas’s belt and the button to his jeans. He looked up at Cas and just as slowly pulled the zipper down. 

Cas’s jeans joined his shirt on the floor and Dean took his own shirt off. He crawled back up above Cas to kiss him, just roughly enough, and ran his hands up and down as much skin as he could touch. Dean kissed his way back down and finally got to Cas’s cock.

Dean rubbed him over his boxers twice before finally pulling those down and tossing them aside. He finally got his own jeans off and tossed them, too. 

“Shit Cas, you look so good like this,” Dean praised, eyes taking Cas in inch by naked inch. 

“Thanks,” Cas said, a little breathlessly, “but if you don’t start touching me I’ll do it myself.”

As tempting as it was to watch Cas fuck into his own fist and come on his own stomach, Dean really wanted to return the favor he received on his birthday. He hadn’t given head since his Dad caught him with that guy.

That memory was quickly banished. Dean focused on the boy in front of him and got to work. 

“Oh,” Cas let out a loud, surprised sounding moan as Dean took his length into his mouth. 

Every move of Dean’s tongue and lips pulled a different and delicious sound out of Cas that made Dean’s erection throb even more. He used his hand too, at the very base and on his balls while he worked the tip with his mouth. 

Cas had a tight grip on Dean’s hair with one hand and the other was fisted in the sheets. His breathes were short and labored so Dean knew he was doing a good job. The hand Dean wasn’t using on Cas moved down to rub himself over his boxers. 

“Shit,” Cas groaned, “I’m…Dean, going to…”

The sentence was left off but Dean understood. He backed off just enough so Cas’s dick wasn’t all the way at the back of his throat and pumped his hand around the rest of his length as Cas came. Dean shoved his hand into his boxers and was coming soon after, needing only a few quick tugs. Cas reaching his own climax with a pretty loud moan was enough for Dean to get off pretty quickly. 

They kept breathing hard as they came down from their orgasms. Dean got up to find a towel to clean his own mess off his hand and lower stomach before snuggling up to Cas as the little spoon. He kind of did it without thinking but didn’t regret it for a second. Cas wrapped his arms around him and any doubts he ever had about cuddling were gone. 

“That was,” Cas paused, nuzzling against Dean’s neck, “amazing.”

“Yeah,” Dean agreed. “And you know what?”

“What?” Cas asked.

“You are too,” Dean said. He was glad he wasn’t facing Cas since he knew his cheeks got even hotter as he said that, still warm from what just happened. 

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas said affectionately, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

“You too, Cas.”

They drifted off into a blissful sleep together.


	14. Shake, Rattle & Roll

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I said shake, rattle and roll. Well, you won't do right to save your doggone soul." Shake, Rattle and Roll, Elvis Presley

“Surprise inspection!” 

Dean blinked his eyes open, rudely awakened. It felt pretty early and the fact that it wasn’t very bright in Cas’s room emphasized that fact. 

_Surprise…what now?_ Dean thought groggily. The words were slow to register. 

“Fuck,” he said, now wide awake as it hit him. “Cas, get up!”

“What?” Cas grumbled into Dean’s shoulder in a sleepy voice. Even in his moment of panic, Dean appreciated how cute he sounded. 

Dean heard Henriksen say “surprise inspection” again, his voice a little closer, maybe only two rooms away.

“Oh shit,” Cas said, hearing Henriksen and understanding Dean’s freak out. They hopped out of Cas’s bed. 

“What do we do?” Dean asked, his eyes wide and panicked. 

Cas knew the hallway wasn’t an option where he would run into Henriksen but he couldn’t stay and have Henriksen find them naked together. Either option would have been disastrous. Cas’s eyes flicked over to the window. 

“You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me,” Dean said in a whisper-shout. 

Cas shrugged, his hands palm-up, unable to think of a better option. 

Henriksen knocked on the room next to Cas’s and they were running out of time. 

“Fuck it,” Dean said with determination. 

He scrambled into his boxers and went to the window as Cas slipped into sweatpants. He flung the window open and scrambled onto the window’s ledge and slid down to dangle from it. As he did that, Cas kicked Dean’s clothes and shoes under his bed. Dean inched to the edge closest to his own window. He prayed no one was on the ground to see him hanging mostly naked out his boyfriend’s window. 

Henriksen knocked on Cas’s door. Dean swung just a little to get momentum to fling himself in a very ungraceful manner towards his own window’s ledge. One hand slipped but he grabbed on again before he could fall the three stories down. That might have hurt a little. 

“Novak, why is your window open?”

“I, uh…”

Dean could hear the exchange but had to focus on not falling. He knew Cas could handle Henriksen and kind of had bigger things to worry about at the moment like not plummeting all the way down to the ground. Dean risked lifting a hand and knocked on his window and thankfully a very confused Benny opened it.

“What the…”

“Shut up and help me in,” Dean demanded. There was no time to explain. 

Benny hauled Dean through the window and shut it just as Henriksen knocked and came in. 

“Gentlemen,” Henriksen greeted. “Surprise inspection. There was a tip about some shenanigans in the building.”

Benny and Dean nodded in response, Dean holding in a laugh at the word shenanigans. He knew this was probably the worst time to laugh. 

Henriksen looked a little skeptical at Dean’s lack of clothing but didn’t say anything. Benny, in contrast to Dean’s simple outfit of boxers only, had on a T-shirt and sweatpants. The rooms were relatively cool since the heating in their building sucked and Dean was still shivering slightly from hanging out in the February chill. Sleeping with Cas against his back had kept him warm and he sincerely wished that was what he was still doing. 

Henriksen walked slowly around the small room and his eyes stopped on the new AC/DC poster. 

“New poster, Winchester?” he asked.

“Yes sir.”

Henriksen considered it and then shrugged.

“Technically, it’s not against the rules so you slide by. This time. Looks good, boys.”

He paused at the door and glanced back a moment at Dean’s little corner of the world between his desk and dresser. 

“Winchester, where are your boots?”

His gym shoes for exercising, uniform boots and black military dress shoes were present but his regular and preferred boots he usually wore were missing. Nothing got past this guy unfortunately. 

“Oh, they’re um, actually they…”

Dean froze up, unsure of an answer that wouldn’t royally screw himself over. 

“You left them out here,” someone called from the hallway.

“Novak,” Henriksen said, “are you responsible for Dean’s shoes?”

“No sir,” Cas responded, standing in their doorway holding the boots, “but they’re out here. He left them in the hallway because they were, uh, muddy.”

“I didn’t even see them,” Henriksen said, “They don’t look muddy to me.”

“I cleaned the mud off and then I left them out there because they were wet?”

The end of the sentence ended up sounding like a question and Dean mentally kicked himself for never learning a better poker face from playing with his dad and Bobby. When he was younger he always got too excited when he got a good hand and it gave him away every time. 

“All right. Just…keep everything in order, okay?” Henriksen said, a little baffled at the whole situation but not concerned enough to stay. 

He continued on with the rest of the inspections in the rooms on their floor. Dean, Cas and Benny all let out a collective breath of relief. 

“Of all days…” Dean cursed. They had never had a surprise inspection before. 

“Did you seriously just jump ledge to ledge like a secret mistress?” Benny taunted. 

“Shut up,” Dean laughed. “I’m just that awesome.”

Cas smiled, still standing in their doorway. 

“Pretty good timing, Cas.”

“I figured if you could scale buildings like Superman then I could make sure that your inspection went as smoothly as possible,” Cas answered, still smiling.

“Superman? More like Batman. He’s way better,” Dean argued. 

“Whatever you say. Do you want to get your clothes before Henriksen comes back and asks where your pants are?” Cas replied. 

Dean followed Cas over to his room and grabbed his jeans, shirt, coat and socks from under Cas’s bed. He had to shake off a bit of dust but didn’t mind. 

“How’s that for a wake-up call?” Dean smirked. 

“I didn’t like it. I was pretty content sleeping with my boyfriend. He’s quite the cuddler,” Cas said with a straight face.

“I am not!” Dean said indignantly. His stomach got all fluttery hearing Cas say his boyfriend. It sounded right coming out of his mouth.

Cas laughed, immediately making Dean smile with the sound. 

“Okay, Dean. Your secret is safe with me.”

“Thank you,” Dean retorted with an adoring eye roll. 

Cas pulled him in for a kiss before Dean went back to his own room to go back to sleep while Cas said he was going to work on homework. Dean didn’t need any more surprises. 

 

“How are you still here?”

Dean turned to his right to see Lucifer striding toward him as he grabbed a smoke on the usual side of the dorm building. The morning’s event had him a little stressed and needing a little something to help him relax. 

“What are you talking about?” Dean replied, blowing smoke in his direction. 

“You. You were supposed to be kicked out,” Lucifer answered, crossing his arms. 

“Why?” Dean said back, pretty sure he knew where he was going with this. 

“Henriksen’s inspection. He was supposed to find you and my lil’ cousin all cozied up.”

“Let me guess. That was your idea, the inspection?”

“Gold star,” Lucifer jeered. “I saw you two sneak into Castiel’s room last night and figured a tip that something was going on in the dorms would help.”

“Well, your plan failed. Better luck next time, chuckles.”

“You can count on it.”

 

Lucifer didn’t make good on that threat for the rest of February. It was a little concerning how quiet Raphael, Lucifer and Michael had become considering how determined they had been to ruin what Dean and Cas had. Dean wasn’t going to question a good thing, though. 

March had begun and that meant they were only a few weeks away from spring break. Dean was hoping for the chance to go home and see Sam. He missed the kid like crazy. It was a scary thought but he wanted his brother and Cas to finally meet so he had an idea.

“Cas, what are you doing for spring break?” Dean asked, trying to make it sound casual. 

“Probably staying here,” Cas answered with a shrug as they ate lunch.

Dean knew that would mean avoiding his cousins and maybe seeing Gabriel if he didn’t go see Kali in town. 

“What if you came home with me? You could meet Sam,” Dean asked, already starting to panic that Cas wouldn’t want to. 

“That sounds great. I’d love to,” Cas said, beaming. Dean smiled back. 

Dean really wanted Cas to meet Sam but was definitely worried about his dad. Cas meeting his family was a big step, even if John wouldn’t completely understand why since Dean couldn’t tell him the whole truth, and Dean really wanted it to go well. Sam never met anyone special to Dean before, mostly because no one had really meant that much to him until Cas. John would hopefully barely be around. 

Benny let Dean borrow his cell phone to call home and talk to Sam. It was a quick conversation since Sam was going to Jess’s house but he let Sam know when his break was and when to tell their dad to come and pick him and a friend up. The message would surely get passed along and now it was up to John if he wanted to see his son or not. 

 

The week before spring break, Cas got a cold on that Monday. It wasn’t too bad so he planned on going to class but Dean stopped him. 

“You can’t go to class, you’re sick!” Dean protested. 

“Yes I can,” Cas complained.

Dean crawled on top of Cas and sprawled out on him to pin him down.

“Nope. You’re not going anywhere,” Dean mumbled against Cas’s chest. “Sick day.”

“Dean, let me up. I have to go to class. So do you,” Cas argued. 

His voice was different than usual from a stuffy nose and he sounded extremely tired. He tried to get Dean off of him but he didn’t budge. 

“Castiel, let me take care of you.”

The use of his full name in Dean’s stern voice got Cas’s attention and he sighed. 

“Fine, I won’t go to class. But you have to. What about taking notes and…”

“Fuck class, I’m going to nurse my boyfriend back to health,” Dean said.

“You’re really stubborn, you know that?”

“Duh, that’s why you like me so much,” Dean said. He watched Cas’s face carefully for a response, making sure what he said wasn’t too clingy. 

Cas smiled so Dean did, too. 

“There are plenty of reasons for that,” Cas said. 

Dean couldn’t stop himself and kissed Cas. 

“No, you’ll get sick too,” Cas protested, pushing Dean back. 

“Then you can take care of me.”

Cas rolled his eyes and let Dean kiss him again. 

They stayed snuggled up under Cas’s blanket, both drifting in and out of sleep, until two sharp knocks on the door startled them both very much awake. 

Dean had been here long enough to know who those knocks belonged to. He silently rolled out of Cas’s arms onto the floor and under the bed. From under there he heard Henriksen enter the room. 

“Novak. I figured you were sick when you weren’t in class. Feeling any better?” he asked. 

“Little bit,” Cas answered. 

“Have you seen Winchester today? He decided not to grace us with his presence this morning.”

“No, I haven’t seen him.”

“If you do, tell him he’s in deep shit.”

Dean let out a quiet snicker that he heard Cas cover up as a cough.

“Will do, sir,” Cas replied. 

Dean heard the door shut and Cas say it was clear so he rolled back out from under the bed. 

“See? I told you not to skip class,” Cas pointed out.

“Whatever,” Dean said with an unconcerned wave of his hand as he climbed back into Cas’s bed. He could deal with Henriksen later. 

 

Later that day, Cas didn’t feel up to dinner so Dean promised to bring him something back from the cafeteria. 

He ate with Benny, Charlie and Garth. When Gabriel heard that Cas wasn’t going to be joining them since he was sick, he decided to sit somewhere else. 

After they ate, Dean snuck into the kitchen part and grabbed an entire container of pasta. 

When he brought it back to Cas, he started laughing.

“I hope you’re going to help me eat all of that,” Cas joked. 

It was a ridiculous amount of pasta and Dean said he would. They ate the pasta and then Dean insisted that Cas get some sleep. 

“Feel better, okay?” Dean said. He kissed Cas on the forehead and left his room.

He stepped outside for a smoke, still smiling at how adorable Cas was even if he was sick. 

As he stood leaning against the wall, the last three people he wanted to see showed up. 

“The hell do you guys want?” Dean greeted Cas’s cousins. 

“If we can’t get you kicked you out, we can make you wish you had been,” Michael said. 

Dean took a last puff of his cigarette and blew the smoke into their faces before stomping the butt out under his boot. 

“You can try but I’m not going anywhere just because you three asshats say so,” Dean snapped. 

Sure, he had hated the school and everyone in it when he got here but things were different now. If he didn’t go to this school, how would he see Cas? Here he got to see him every day and got decent grades for the first time in his life. This place didn’t turn out to be so bad after all except for the three clowns in front of him and their dick of a father.

Without another word, fists were flying. Michael landed a punch to Dean’s gut and received a solid right hook to his jaw in return. Raphael tried to grab him from behind so he threw his head back to head butt him. Dean heard a solid crack and hoped he broke his nose. Lucifer got a hold of one of Dean’s arms which allowed Michael to get several solid punches in as Dean tried to wriggle away. Raphael gathered himself and grabbed Dean’s other arm. He twisted, trying to get out of their grip as Michael kept punching but to no avail. He kept using his feet to kick at all three of them but it didn’t really have any effect. 

“Hey!” a voice called out. 

The three douchebags ran off but not before they threw Dean into the wall, hard. His vision went black for a moment.

“Winchester! Hey, can you hear me?” 

It sounded like Henriksen but Dean couldn’t be sure. Everything was fuzzy and he kept blinking, struggling to stay conscious. 

“Stay with me kid, come on. Dean?”

Dean blinked some more and looked up from where he lay on the ground. A very worried looking Henriksen was crouching over him, the light on the side of the building shining behind him and making Dean squint. 

“Henriksen,” Dean said. 

“What the hell happened?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” Dean lied. 

“Seriously? Maybe now isn’t the time to be a smartass.”

Dean said nothing since he was struggling not to throw his dinner up. 

“Let’s get you to the nurse or someone, you’re pretty beat up,” Henriksen advised. 

“Seriously, I’m fine,” Dean insisted.

Henriksen still clearly didn’t believe him and just helped him up. Dean winced at the pain coursing through his body.

“You going to tell me who did this to you?” Henriksen pried. The fight caused them to move into the dark and Henriksen couldn’t have gotten a good look at them. 

Dean gave him a pointed look that clearly conveyed he wasn’t a snitch.

“Just thought I’d ask. It’s brave not to talk. Stupid…but brave. I get it even if I don’t agree.”

Dean nodded. He didn’t necessarily want to protect those idiots but he was no tattletale. 

Henriksen walked him into the dorm and into the stairwell, starting at the first floor to check for lights out as Dean continued up to the third. 

“You sure you’ll be okay?” Henriksen asked.

“Yeah,” Dean grimaced. “Thanks.”

 

Dean woke up the next morning and felt worse than he had the night before.

Henriksen was lenient about the state of Dean’s unmade bed and also seemed to forget that Dean skipped his class the day before, at least for now. It was a surprisingly nice move.

Dean walked out of his room with Benny at about the same time Cas walked out of his room. 

“Hey Cas,” Dean said, feeling a little better seeing him. “You feeling okay?”

“Yeah, I… What the hell happened?” Cas said upon seeing the state that Dean was in. 

He knew he probably looked terrible. It felt like he had a black eye, split lip and a couple other bruises on his face plus his side was definitely bruised and his head was killing him along with a rough scrape on his arm when he hit the brick wall. His shoulders were also pretty sore from trying to wrestle out very strong hands and his knuckles hurt from when he landed some punches. 

“Nothing,” Dean tried, knowing damn well Cas wouldn’t believe him. 

Benny walked ahead of them to let them talk. Dean had played it off like nothing happened but he had guessed who had hurt Dean when he came into their room last night.

“Did my cousins do this to you?” Cas said angrily. 

“Look, it’s not a big deal. I got a couple hits in, think I broke Raphael’s nose…”

“Not a big deal? We have to tell Zachariah!” Cas exclaimed. 

“What would be the point?” Dean shrugged. “You know they never get in trouble.”

“Did they say anything?” Cas pressed. 

“Yeah, they’re trying to make me wish I was kicked out,” Dean tried to start walking. 

“Well, you used to wish that right?” Cas grabbed Dean’s shoulder and spun him back around. 

“Until we started dating.”

Cas opened his mouth to answer but shut it, his cheeks getting pink.

“I like seeing you every day,” Dean said, making Cas blush just a little more. 

“Me too,” Cas said. 

They shared a quick kiss before Benny called at them from the end of the hallway to hurry up. 

“I think I know what we can do,” Cas said as they walked towards Benny.

“What?” Dean asked. 

“Well, they want to try to get you kicked out?” 

Dean nodded. 

“Two can play at that game. What do you say we try to get my cousins kicked out?”


	15. Fooled Around and Fell in Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I must have been through about a million girls, I'd love 'em and I'd leave them alone. I didn't care how much they cried, no sir. Their tears left me cold as a stone. But then I fooled around and fell in love. I fooled around and fell in love since I met you baby." Fooled Around and Fell in Love, Elvin Bishop

Classes were finally done on the Friday to start spring break. Dean and Cas waited outside in the comfortably warm weather by the school’s front gates waiting for John to pick them up. Dean kept shifting back and forth on which foot he was standing on.

“Dean, it’s going to be fine,” Cas said, trying to get Dean to relax. 

“I know it will be with Sam. I just don’t know about my dad,” Dean said, looking down the road. 

Cas sighed. He figured the only thing that would help would be when he finally met his family. Sure, Dean was nervous but so was Cas. He never had been in a relationship and was already meeting his boyfriend’s family. It was a little nerve-wracking.

The Impala rolled up with John driving and Sam sitting in the front seat. Dean and Cas got into the long bench-style backseat. 

“Heya Sammy,” Dean said. “Thanks for getting us, Dad.”

“Yeah,” John said. “You must be Dean’s friend.”

“I’m Cas. Nice to meet you Mr. Winchester,” Cas said, sounding a little stiff as his lifetime of military drilling and discipline kicked in. Dean could relate. He had similar training from John, he just chose to ignore it most of the time. 

“Hi Dean. Hi Cas,” Sam said. He was grinning but Dean trusted him not to say anything stupid about the two of them, not in front of John. 

“Hello Sam,” Cas said, “I’ve heard a lot about of you.” 

“Same,” Sam replied. “Well, kind of.”

Cas was going to say something, probably ask for further clarification about what Sam was talking about, but Dean gave him a look that said he would tell him later. The conversation that Dean and Sam had about Cas over winter break was not something John should hear. 

They got to the Winchester house and went inside. It was small so Dean only gave a quick tour to their guest.

John only stayed around for a little bit before saying he was going out. Dean knew he meant drinking at some bar but didn’t really care. Cas was at his house and that kind of made everything else not really matter somehow. 

“So what did Dean tell you about me Sam?” Cas asked. 

The three of them were in the kitchen and while Dean was making dinner, Cas and Sam sat at the table. It wobbled a little but it was hardly noticeable. 

“Well, he said that he kissed your cousin,” Sam said. 

Dean turned from where he stood at the stove and got a deserved glare from Cas. 

“Still sorry about that,” Dean said with a grimace, turning back to keep flipping the grilled cheese sandwiches. 

“What else?” Cas asked.

“Um, I think he said… Oh yeah, he said he liked you a lot. And that he was going to tell you right when he got back to school if I promised to tell Jess which I did and he did too I guess because you’re like boyfriends now right?” Sam said rapidly. 

“Yes we are,” Cas said with a smile that Dean could hear without having to turn around. 

Dean felt his face burn just a little and decided sharing time was over. He was glad they were getting along but he didn’t like that he was their topic of choice, even if he really liked hearing Cas call him his boyfriend.

“All right, eat your sandwiches,” Dean grumbled, dropping the plates down. He added some potato chips with the sandwiches and grabbed them some Cokes. 

The three of them ate and then decided to watch some TV. Dean picked Star Wars and figured he could start Cas out on them since he had said he had never seen them. 

As they watched them, Sam fell asleep during the second movie in the recliner while Dean and Cas stayed snuggled on the couch. 

“What did you think?” Dean asked when it was over, quiet enough to not wake Sam.

“Well, you built them up a lot but…”

“You’re kidding right?”

Cas smiled.

“Oh my god, I thought we would have to break up,” Dean joked.

Cas stopped smiling but then realized Dean was messing with him and smiled again.

“You would have broken up with me over a movie?” Cas asked, snuggling even closer to Dean’s side.

“No, of course not,” Dean reassured him. “But you did like them right?”

“Yes Dean,” Cas laughed softly. “I especially liked watching them with you.”

Dean kissed Cas. It had been a long time since he had really kissed him so he quickly slid his tongue over Cas’s lips who opened his mouth. 

They were barely making out for five minutes when they heard a key in the front door. They had plenty of time to spring apart since it sounded like John was really struggling to open the door. He stumbled through the front door and didn’t even notice them in the living room. He walked right past them and into his room, smelling very strongly of whiskey.

Dean got up to look out the front window and saw a taxi driving away. The Impala was nowhere to be seen. 

“God damn it,” Dean shook his head. 

“What?” Cas asked. 

“He took a taxi, and I’m glad, but that means we gotta get the Impala tomorrow from whatever dive he left her at,” Dean explained. 

That wasn’t the first time and it wouldn’t be the last. Dean walked over to the recliner and gently shook Sam awake.

“Bed time,” Dean said. 

“I can take the couch,” Sam answered, his eyes barely open. 

“You sure?” 

“Yeah, Cas is our guest. He can have my bed.”

Dean thanked him and ruffled his hair. 

“You get his bed, Cas. Let’s go,” Dean said. 

They all got ready for bed. Dean and Cas said goodnight to Sam before going into the bedroom. 

“Sam’s going to fall right back asleep and my dad’s dead to the world,” Dean said, shutting the door. 

“So…” Cas answered, knowing where Dean was going with this but wanting him to say it anyways. 

“So get over here,” Dean smirked. 

Cas took a couple steps closer to Dean and was pulled into a greedy kiss. Dean guided them back to his own bed, easing onto his back with Cas on top.

“Let’s finish what we started on the couch,” Dean said against Cas’s mouth. 

He pushed Cas’s shirt up and over his head before getting his own off. They both had on sweatpants and shoved them off and away. Dean didn’t feel the need to take his time, he had all the time in the world to explore Cas. He had done it before and he could do it again. That idea sent a thrill through him and he pushed his hips up and pulled Cas close. 

Dean slid his hands down Cas’s back and grabbed his ass which pulled an amazing moan from his boyfriend that Dean felt in their kiss. He wanted them naked, now. Without wasting time, he got their boxers off and finally had their erections together. 

Cas reached down and took them both in his hand, pumping them together while grinding his hips. 

“Caaas,” Dean groaned, throwing his head back. It was just quiet enough that no one else would hear it. Cas sucked a hickey onto his neck and kept moving. 

“Fuck, you feel so good against me, Dean,” Cas said, a low growl in Dean’s ear. 

That noise alone almost had Dean coming but he held out a little longer. Their movements became erratic and their breathing hot and heavy as they finally came together. Cas was so close on top of Dean that some got on his chest and stomach, too. 

Dean got them a towel to clean off and then they curled up together, Cas as the little spoon. 

“I’m glad you’re here, Cas,” Dean said, barely loud enough for Cas to hear even though he was right by his ear.

Cas turned and tilted his head up to kiss Dean.

“Me too,” Cas said.

 

~

Dean and Cas were woken up by knocking on the door.

“What?” Dean snapped in a mumble, still curled around Cas.

“Dad’s sleeping and I’m hungry,” Sam whined from the other side of the door. “And I want to get dressed.”

“Don’t come in yet,” Dean called back.

“Why not?”

“The fuck you think, man?” Dean said. “We’re naked.”

Cas laughed at that while Sam made a disgusted noise. He wasn’t sure if Dean would be shy about their relationship around his brother and was pleasantly surprised how transparent he was about it.

“Oh, you’re awake,” Dean said, kissing below Cas’s ear. 

Cas made a happy humming noise and pressed back against Dean. He moved his hips just enough to rub his ass along Dean’s crotch.

“Hey, I’d love to but…” Dean said. 

“Fine,” Cas sighed. “Later.”

He turned around to face Dean.

“I could get used to this.”

“What?” Dean asked.

“Waking up with you,” Cas replied. 

Dean felt his jaw drop a little but nothing came out. He wanted to agree and kiss his boyfriend but another part of him wanted to run as far away as possible. 

“I…”

“It’s okay,” Cas smiled and kissed Dean. “I get it.”

“Get what?”

“You agree but you’re panicking.”

Dean set his mouth in a tight line. How could he read his mind like that?

“Let’s make breakfast,” Cas said. 

He got out of Dean’s arms and out of bed. Dean missed the warmth immediately. He almost pulled Cas back down to tell him how right he was and that he really did like waking up with him in his arms but he didn’t. He missed his chance.

They threw their sweatpants and shirts on before joining Sam down the hall in the kitchen. Dean ruffled the kid’s hair before he got to work with Cas making eggs and bacon. 

“So, I think I’m going to go hang out with Jess today,” Sam said.

“Oh really?” Dean asked, just to be difficult.

“Yeah. You get to hang with Cas and I want to hang out with Jess,” Sam protested.

“I’m just messing, Sammy. After we find the Impala, I can drive you.”

“You still don’t have your license,” Sam pointed out.

“Details,” Dean replied, waving his fork in the air which made some eggs fall of it back on his plate. Cas smiled while watching the whole interaction. Dean turned as he kept eating and caught Cas’s eye. He smiled before looking back down at his food.

After they ate, Sam took advantage of having the bedroom empty and got dressed. Cas went to take a quick shower. Dean got dressed too and drank a second mug of coffee while he sat with Sam at the kitchen table.

“Dean, can I ask you something?” Sam asked.

“Maybe,” Dean said, wary of where Sam was going with this. 

“When did you know you loved Cas?”

Dean, in hindsight, realized he shouldn’t have taken a drink right when Sam was going to ask something since he could have guessed it was going to be about Cas. He coughed and sputtered on the coffee and his eyes started to water.

“Jesus,” he said, trying to breathe. “Fuck, man.”

He got up and walked to the sink to cup some water in his hand and drank a little. He wiped his hand off on a towel and used the back of his hand to wipe the tears out of his eyes. 

“You okay?” Sam asked with a slightly smug grin. 

“I’m fine,” Dean snapped. “Why would you ask that?”

“About if you’re okay or…”

“The other thing,” Dean said, not meeting Sam’s eyes.

“Because I’m not blind?” Sam answered like it was obvious.

“What are you talking about?” Dean demanded to know.

“Oh come on, you are so very clearly in l…”

Dean lunged over the table to cover Sam’s mouth as he heard the door to the bathroom open. 

“You guys okay?” Cas called from down the hallway. 

Dean looked down the hall and saw Cas standing with just a towel wrapped around his sharp hipbones. There was still some water dripping down his chest and his hair was all messed up.

“Uh…” was Dean’s intelligible answer.

“Fine,” Sam replied, wrestling away from Dean.

The two brothers glared at each other as Cas shrugged and walked into their room to get dressed. 

“Right. I’m completely crazy,” Sam said sarcastically with an added eye-roll for emphasis. 

“Shut up,” Dean snapped, a little embarrassed how his brain shut off seeing Cas half-naked and wet.

“Nice hickey by the way,” Sam said, pressing his luck before Dean would tackle him.

“Shut up,” Dean repeated, feeling his face heat up. 

Sam just laughed. 

 

The three found the Impala at the closest bar, about a twenty minute walk away from their house. 

“Awesome,” Dean said. He was glad she was still in good condition and he could drive her again. It had been too long. 

“You sure you want to drive without a license?” Cas asked. 

“Pile in,” Dean said, ignoring his boyfriend’s concerns. Cas got in the front seat and Sam climbed into the back.

“All right. How do we get to Jessica’s house?” Dean asked.

They got there and dropped Sam off with a promise to pick him up later.

“Now what?” Cas asked. 

They hadn’t talked much as they walked to the car or drove. What Sam had said had hit Dean hard. Maybe the kid was right, just maybe, but so what if he was? Dean wasn’t about to give some sappy love confession to his boyfriend after only two months. That was nuts. There was no way Cas felt that way too and he would probably run so fast in the other direction if Dean opened his dumb mouth…

“Dean?”

“Hmm?” Dean asked, turning to look at Cas.

“What now?” he repeated.

“Oh. Um. There’s a park close to here?” Dean said, not sure if Cas would want to do that.

“That sounds great,” Cas smiled. Dean visibly relaxed and drove them there.

The two of them walked and enjoyed the nice weather. The trees were blooming and there was a small pond that had ducks swimming in it. Dean didn’t think there were that many people so he held Cas’s hand. In response, Cas bumped Dean’s shoulder gently with his own as they walked.

Dean turned red as they walked, still thinking about what Sam said earlier. He couldn’t shake it because the kid was right. Dean was in love with Cas.

He was fucked and he knew it. 

 

After they walked around the park, talking and joking, they got back in the car to drive around until it was time to get Sam. 

“Sam is a good kid,” Cas said.

“The best. I’m glad you guys get along,” Dean answered. 

“Me too,” Cas agreed.

Dean reached across the bench seat to grab Cas’s hand. Even if he was scared of what Sam had helped him realize earlier, he couldn’t stop wanting to hold Cas’s hand. He always wanted to be with Cas and when he was he couldn’t keep his hands off him even just little touches. 

“Perceptive little shit,” Dean said under his breath, annoyed at how smart Sam was.

“What?” Cas asked, eyebrows furrowed with a head tilt. 

It was adorable like always and Dean laughed. 

“Nothing,” he answered and turned up the Led Zeppelin song they were listening to and sang along. It was a good distraction from saying anything stupid. 

They picked Sam up and then got a pizza for dinner. Cas insisted on buying it as a thanks for hosting him as a guest. Both Sam and Dean protested but gave in. The next argument was what kind to get. Dean wanted as much meat as possible while Sam wanted veggie. Cas didn’t care either way so they got a large with each half split with what they wanted.

While they ate at the kitchen table, their dad came out of his room and grabbed a slice from Dean’s side with all the meat. 

“Where did this come from?” John asked.

“Picked it up,” Dean answered. He didn’t mention Castiel bought it. 

“You get my car?” John answered, still standing and eating his pizza.

“Yes sir,” Dean said, taking a drink of Coke. 

“Good.” 

He disappeared back into his room. Sam shook his head.

“You shouldn’t take his shit,” Sam said.

“Don’t, Sam,” Dean said, squeezing his eyes shut. 

They continued eating in slightly tense silence. As they cleaned up, John exited out the front door without a word. 

“Fucking useless…” Sam grumbled. A pointed look from Dean shut him up. This wasn’t the time, not while Cas was around. Dean had invited his boyfriend to stay with them to avoid family drama. 

The three of them continued the Star Wars marathon with the next two movies. That meant the last one from before and then the first prequel. After, they went to bed where Dean and Cas did the same thing as the night before, quietly moving together until they came together.

Over the rest of spring break, it was more of the same. There was plenty of junk food, movies and hanging out. Cas and Jess met and got along very well. She insisted they watch what Cas thought Dean would consider a chick-flick but who ended up agreeing enthusiastically. The movie didn’t matter as long as Cas could snuggle with Dean on the beat up but comfortable couch. 

As they enjoyed their time off, they also plotted against Castiel’s three cousins. On one of the last days of break, they ate lunch while Sam was out with Jess and got to work. 

“We need something on them since they have something on us. Then they wouldn’t want to tell Zachariah about us and we won’t get expelled,” Cas stated. 

“If we both get expelled that could be fun,” Dean said. 

He started daydreaming about getting a job working on cars and coming home to Cas every night. He immediately threw that idea out. Cas wouldn’t want to stick around if he got them expelled. The guy would probably go to some other fancy school and leave him behind.

“Let’s think of a plan that keeps us in school so my family doesn’t completely disown me. I would still very much like go to college and this school will help,” Cas replied. 

Dean nodded. Then he had an idea.

“What about Gabriel?” Dean asked.

“What about him?” 

“He could help. He occasionally hangs out with them so maybe he knows their dirty secrets!” Dean exclaimed, excited that he thought of a plan. 

“You know, you might have something. Anna could help, too.”

“Are, uh, you sure that’s a good idea? I don’t know if she’ll want to help me,” Dean said, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck and not meeting Cas’s eyes. 

“Because you kissed her and then never talked to her again and are now dating her cousin?” Cas said in a deadpan. 

“Um. Yes? It sounds bad when you say it like that.”

“Well, we’ve always gotten along pretty well. She could help. I’ll talk to her and kind of ease her into this,” Cas said, taking Dean’s hand across the table.

“Does Gabriel know we’re dating?” Dean asked. He honestly didn’t know. 

“I don’t think he does. I’ll have to talk to him, too.”

“Great,” Dean said. 

It would be harder if more people knew about them to keep it a secret. But if Cas trusted them then so did Dean. 

Besides, Dean now had a much larger issue than Cas’s family. The realization that he was in love with Cas kind of trumped everything. Dean just had to enjoy what they had until Cas finally realized he was too good for Dean and ditched him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tumblr: jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com Come say hi and thanks for all the kind words and kudos on here! I've read all the comments and they honestly mean a lot.


	16. Back in Black

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I keep looking at the sky cause it's gettin' me high, forget the hearse cause I'll never die. I got nine lives cat's eyes, using every one of them and runnin' wild." Back in Black, AC/DC

Dean and Cas said goodbye to Sam back at the Winchester house and were driven back to the military academy after their spring break was over Sunday night by John.

“Thank you again for letting me stay with you, Mr. Winchester,” Cas said politely. 

“Sure thing. Make sure you keep my son in line,” John answered.

“Yes sir,” Cas replied. Dean caught a hint of a smirk on his boyfriend’s face in the rearview mirror. Luckily, John didn’t see it considering that it was more than a little suggestive.

“Bye Dad,” Dean said, climbing out of the front seat as Cas got out of the back.

“Be good, son.”

Dean nodded before John drove off. After the car began to move, Dean let out a sigh of relief.

“That didn’t go nearly as bad as I thought it would,” Dean said, smiling at Cas. “But of course my dad and Sammy would like you, how could they not?”

Dean kissed Cas once the Impala was out of sight. He needed to use his mouth for something else besides talking before he talked too much about how much he himself liked Castiel. Leave it to stupid feelings getting in the way to ruin a good thing. They always did.

“Doesn’t he know that keeping you in line is a too big of a job for one person?” Cas teased.

He had to kiss Cas again because he was being too cute. Dean laughed against Cas’s mouth. He took a step back and shook his head.

“What?” Cas asked. 

Dean opened his mouth and wanted to say how lucky he was or how glad he was Cas had stayed with him and met Sam or how friggin’ adorable he was but also a total badass other times. He shut his mouth. 

“Nothing,” Dean said, looking away from Cas’s piercing eyes. 

They carried their bags upstairs to their rooms. Once they got to their rooms, they went their separate ways to put their stuff away. 

“How’d it go?” Benny asked, already lounging on his bed.

“Good,” Dean said truthfully while putting some clothes away. “Cas and Sam got along and John was barely around. It was great.”

It really had been a good week. He woke up with Cas every morning and spent pretty much every minute with him. It was going to be a long week until they could sleep together on the weekend and Dean couldn’t wait. By some miracle, Cas still hadn’t gotten sick of him. Yet.

“What’s with the look?” Benny wanted to know. 

“What look?”

“You were looking sad even though you were sayin’ how good the week was. What’s up?”

Dean knew he could trust Benny and needed to tell someone.

“While I was home, Sammy helped me realize something about, uh, me and Cas and I…” Dean paused and scratched the back of his neck, “it’s stupid, never mind.”

“Dean, you can talk to me. What happened?” 

“I’m in love with Cas,” Dean said in one rushed breath. There, he said it out loud at least to someone.

“That’s it?”

“What do you mean, ‘that’s it’?” Dean gaped. This was a huge deal and that was Benny’s response?

“I mean I already knew that. Charlie knew that. Shit, how did you not know that? It’s the most obvious thing I’ve ever seen,” Benny said before cracking up.

“Obvious?” Dean repeated incredulously. He had an “oh shit” moment of panic before asking, “Do you think Cas knows?”

Benny laughed some more until he saw Dean’s face and how serious he was.

“Of course, brother. Have you seen how he looks at you? He loves you too, you big idiot.”

“That’s…that’s crazy!” Dean said, taken aback. 

There was no way. Why would he? There was no possible way someone like Cas loved him. That boy was too good for Dean and he would realize it soon enough. Benny was crazy.

“I see those gears moving in your head, Dean. Stop doubting it. Remember when I was right about him liking you in the first place?” Benny said with one raised eyebrow.

Dean shrugged. Sure, Benny was right then but this was different. This was the next level.

“Exactly,” Benny said with a smug grin.

“Okay, maybe you’re right,” Dean said, still doubtful, “but we got a bigger problem here.”

 

Dean explained to Benny and later in the week Charlie and Garth the plan he and Cas had about getting some dirt on Michael, Raphael and Lucifer. Cas was tasked with talking to Gabriel and Anna to get them on board after he finally let them know that he and Dean were dating.

They all met in Dean and Benny’s room on the first Saturday of April instead of going into town. It had been a rough week back at school after taking a week off. A trip to Dean’s favorite diner and a nice burger would have been more than welcome but it was time to take action. The nasty cousins hadn’t tried anything yet but it would just be a matter of time. 

Gabriel had grumbled that he wanted to go see Kali but was quiet after a look from Cas. Gabriel, while against getting involved in his family’s battle, wanted to help his little brother. 

Cas had told Dean that Gabriel had been more or less unconcerned by the fact that Dean was dating his brother. He made some sexual joke and moved on. Anna had been a little more difficult to convince to help.

“Gabriel you are probably closest to our cousins,” Cas said. “What can we threaten them with?”

“You know they like a fight,” Gabriel shrugged, not looking up from his phone where he was presumably texting Kali. “You and your boy toy could try that again.”

“Yeah, but that could get us kicked out, too,” Dean pointed out, ignoring the nickname.

“Anna?” Castiel asked. 

After a glare towards Dean, she turned to Cas.

“Their grades.”

“What about them?” Charlie asked. 

“They’re terrible. Right Gabriel?” Anna said.

“Yeah, yeah,” Gabriel answered dismissively, eyes still down. 

Anna and Cas both rolled their eyes. Dean would have been lying if he had said the similar gesture didn’t weird him out. He was kind of trying to forget that he kissed Anna and their similarities were making it a little hard.

“If they’re really bad, they should be kicked out,” Cas said. “There is a GPA standard here but I bet Zachariah helped sweep that under the rug.”

“Okay, we got something,” Benny said, “but we need proof that their grades are below average. We wave that at them and they’ll leave you both alone.”

“Zachariah’s office!” Garth suggested with a smile but then his face fell. “But we can’t get in there.”

“Yes we can,” Charlie grinned. “It’s easy, we break in. And I can get on his computer.”

“Really?” Dean asked, impressed.

“You’re not the only one whose been kicked out of a school,” she winked. 

“Can I go now?” Anna asked icily. 

Cas nodded. She walked out without looking at anyone.

“She’s still mad at me?” Dean asked Cas when the door slammed shut.

“She’ll come around,” Cas assured him, grabbing his hand and squeezing.

“All right, let’s make a plan,” Dean said. 

 

“Do you think it’s going to work?” Dean asked.

He was curled up with Cas in his bed, facing him, after they all finished planning a break in.

“Breaking into my uncle’s office tomorrow?” Cas asked. Dean nodded. “Yes, it has to.”

Dean closed his eyes. 

“I don’t want you to get in trouble,” Dean said.

“And I don’t want you to get kicked out or hurt by my cousins anymore,” Cas said, kissing one of Dean’s eyelids. “We have to do this.”

Dean opened his eyes after the affectionate gesture and thought he saw what Benny said earlier. It certainly looked like Cas loved him when he looked at him like that but Dean didn’t really want to think about that so he kissed his boyfriend, hard. Cas kissed back just as passionately.

They kissed until they had to breathe, both panting, and looked at each other. 

“Shit Cas, I wish we could do this every night,” Dean said, cheeks flushed from kissing and slight embarrassment. He would have honestly been okay with just sleeping next to his boyfriend and occasional kissing but the other stuff was good as well. 

“Me too,” Cas said. 

He kissed Dean. It was easy to forget about everything else when they were like this and that’s exactly what Dean needed. He didn’t want to think about how he felt or what they were doing tomorrow. He just wanted to make his boyfriend feel good.

Dean rolled on top of Cas and rolled his hips against him and felt Cas getting hard. Cas moaned into Dean’s mouth. The two of them, having done this so many times now, got the other one’s clothes off quickly. 

“Fuck, Cas,” Dean groaned. 

They were naked and pressed together, both moving and wanting more. Dean was straddling Cas and had both of their dicks in his hand so could get them off together. He started pumping them, nice and slow, until Cas let out a breathless “faster.” Dean eagerly listened, grinding harder against Cas and sliding his hand quicker up and down. He leaned down to nibble against Cas’s neck and mutter his name. Cas ran his hands up and down Dean’s back, lightly scratching. 

It didn’t take long for their movements to falter before coming, a low groan from each of them that wasn’t too loud. The last thing they needed was anyone hearing them and finding out. 

Dean got up to get a towel to clean them off before he climbed back into bed, pulling Cas back against his chest.

“I wish we could do that every night, too,” Dean said between soft kisses to Cas’s neck.

“What about sex?” Cas asked, a little timidly.

“What do you mean, we just…” Dean replied, not sure what Cas was getting at. He didn’t mean…

“I mean sex,” Cas interrupted. 

“Oh,” Dean said. “I, uh…well. Yeah. I mean…”

“Have you?” Cas wanted to know. “With a guy?”

“No,” Dean admitted. “With a girl, yeah but…that’s different.”

“Do you not want to?” Cas asked, sensing Dean’s hesitation.

“Oh, I do,” Dean said. “Hell, with you I bet it’d be awesome.”

“You think?” Cas asked nervously. Dean was still very aware how new a lot of this was to Cas.

“Yeah,” Dean said, pulling Cas tighter to him. 

Cas turned his head to kiss Dean.

“You drive me crazy you know that?” Dean muttered against Cas’s lips. 

“Oh, that feeling is completely mutual,” Cas whispered, his eyes fluttering shut sleepily.

Cas made the humming noise he usually did when he was both happy and tired. Dean thought it was absolutely adorable so he kissed him again. Cas turned his head away from Dean and shifted to get comfortable. Slowly, his breathing evened out and he was asleep.

“I’ll tell you, Cas,” Dean promised quietly to his sleeping boyfriend. “Soon, I’ll tell you exactly how much you mean to me.”

 

The two of them slept in the next morning. Dean honestly wanted to avoid the reality of what they were doing later so he was content just staying in bed. That and he really didn’t like waking up early. Once he did he was fine but preferably he would sleep in.

Cas could tell something was up as they kissed lazily. He stopped, raising a hand to cup Dean’s face as they faced each other.

“Dean, I know you’re worried but…”

“What if I get kicked out? I’d be the first to go if we get caught and you know it. Then I wouldn’t be able to see you every day and my dad would flip…”

“Dean,” Cas said firmly. “Everything will be fine.”

“How do you know?”

“I don’t,” Cas shrugged. “I don’t know if it will be fine but it’s definitely going to be fun.”

His face broke into a grin. Dean had to smile, too. He thought about how lucky he was to have such a great boyfriend that could make him feel better so quickly. 

“You know, the Castiel I first met wouldn’t be so excited to break into his uncle’s office,” Dean pointed out with a smirk.

“Well, you are a terrible influence Dean Winchester,” Cas said before kissing Dean.

There were several soft knocks on the door.

“We’re going to lunch if you want to come. But you have to wear clothes,” Charlie called out. They could hear Benny laugh.

“Should we?” Dean asked Cas.

“Yes. As fun as this is, I am pretty hungry,” Cas answered. 

“Hold on,” Dean called to their friends. 

They got up and threw on sweatpants and T-shirts. At this point, Dean wasn’t sure if he was wearing his clothes or Cas’s and he didn’t care. His always landed on the floor when he slept here and he just kind of picked up the closest items to wear in the morning and Cas did the same.

Before they left the room, Dean ran his hands through Cas’s hair to mess it up even more. Cas swatted his hands away and Dean laughed.

“Nice sex hair,” Charlie greeted, making Cas turn red. 

“We didn’t…” Cas tried.

“Hi to you too, Charlie,” Dean grinned, ignoring the grumpy look from Cas. It was too much fun messing with him and getting him flustered.

“Not just the hair gave it away. These walls are thin,” Benny complained. “You know I have to sleep with headphones in now that you two are all couple-y and shit?”

“Oh, don’t be jealous Benny,” Dean said. 

He pulled Cas against his side with an arm around his waist and kissed his cheek. Cas pushed him off and Dean laughed some more. His boyfriend was not much of a morning person especially once they were out of bed. 

The four of them met up with Garth and went to lunch. It was early afternoon and they had plenty of time to kill before their plan for the evening would take place. They had figured it would be best for the break-in to be at night. 

After lunch, they shot some pool. It was not for money because Dean would have easily cleaned their pockets and they all knew it. Cas hadn’t really played much so Dean stood behind him to guide his hands on the pool stick. Benny gave him a knowing look and Dean turned red, realizing how cheesy and cliché he had just been. Charlie smiled and Dean felt a little better. 

Afterwards, they worked on finishing up any homework they hadn’t done over the weekend which for Dean was all of it. It was hard to focus knowing that they were getting close to go-time but he got it done. Henriksen announced lights out and once he was gone, their plan went into action. 

Benny and Dean, clad in all black, met Cas in the hallway. He was also wearing all black. If they got caught in Zachariah’s office, the color they were wearing wouldn’t matter but the walk there needed to be as stealthy as possible. 

Gabriel was hopefully doing his job of making sure Lucifer, Michael and Raphael were staying put in their rooms. Anna didn’t want to help any further than the information she had given. 

Benny, Dean and Cas met Charlie and Garth outside the dorm building and silently headed for Zachariah’s office. Well, silent after Garth had tried to back out and Dean grabbed his arm and pulled him along. 

They reached the administration building. Dean was up first, busting out his lock pick set and putting it to good use. Benny and Charlie shared an impressed look and then the five of them snuck inside once the door was open.

Up on the second floor where Zachariah’s office was, Dean again picked the lock. Benny stayed at the end of the hallway as a lookout while the other four got in to the office. Garth stayed by the door in case Benny needed to signal that someone was coming. Dean, Cas and Charlie went over to the desk that had Zachariah’s computer on top.

“I really want to trash his office,” Dean said under his breath. Cas cracked a smile but otherwise stayed quiet. 

Charlie didn’t need a lot of time to get into the computer. Few more minutes and she printed the evidence they needed to finally get the trio of assholes off their backs. 

Garth peaked out the door and got the all clear from Benny. 

“Any problems?” Dean asked as they all went down the stairs. 

“Just a janitor. He didn’t see me,” Benny answered quietly. 

Dean stuck his head out the building’s front door when they reached it. It was clear and they walked quickly back to the dorm. Charlie and Garth disappeared to their floors. Dean gave Cas a quick kiss goodbye with the promise to see him tomorrow for breakfast.

Dean let out a huge sigh of relief being back in his own room safe and sound. If they had been caught, it would have been disastrous. He hid the paper with the grades in his desk drawer. 

“Anna wasn’t kidding, these guys are really stupid,” Dean laughed, having now seen the terrible grades. 

“I think we already knew that. This is just proof of it,” Benny joked back. 

Dean went to bed feeling pretty good. Finally, he wouldn’t have to worry about Castiel’s cousins. He just had to worry about telling Cas that he loved him which was much scarier, to Dean, than dealing with his boyfriend’s extended family. He had never said it to anyone since he had lost his mom, not even to Sammy and definitely not to any girlfriend or fling he had had. Besides, they had been together for a little over two months and Dean didn’t know if that was too soon. Would Cas freak? Or would he say it back?

Apparently, the only way to find out would be to find out would be to man up and admit his feelings. 

Dean fell asleep imagining a scenario where he told Cas he loved him and Cas said it right back and kissed him and it was the best kiss they ever shared.


	17. Talk Dirty To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You know I never, I never seen you look so good. You never act the way you should. But I like it, and I know you like it too. The way that I want you I gotta have you. Oh yes, I do." Talk Dirty To Me, Poison.

Monday morning, Dean woke up when the usual loud trumpets came over the loudspeakers and made his bed while humming Metallica. 

“The hell are you so chipper for?” Benny asked, making his own bed. 

“It’s a great day. Those assholes will finally back off,” Dean said, putting his pillow back into place. 

Finally, if Cas’s cousins bothered him he had a way to get them to leave them alone for good.

Henriksen knocked twice on the door, like always, and walked in. 

“Looks good guys,” he said, impressed. He strolled out of their room after another glance around the room.

“Let’s go eat breakfast,” Dean said, still smiling a bit. He hummed all the way to breakfast. 

They met Cas in the cafeteria. It was a day where they were supposed to wear their uniforms and Cas was already sitting at a table with Charlie and Garth. 

“God damn, you look sexy in that,” Dean said into Cas’s ear so only he heard while standing behind him. He was in a great mood and couldn’t help himself. 

Cas flushed red immediately. Dean couldn’t help but smirk as he sat down next to him. Before anyone could notice, Dean squeezed Cas’s thigh and Cas jumped a little. 

They ate like nothing had happened and their friends didn’t notice anything. Dean kept his foot right next to Cas’s the entire time they ate. Dean really enjoyed making Cas squirm a bit. 

On their way to Henriksen’s class, Cas pulled Dean into their usual bathroom and slammed him against the wall. Cas pinned Dean’s wrists above his head.

“You are a complete dick, you know that?” Cas growled, eyes narrowed. 

He was right in Dean’s face and honestly, Dean was pretty turned on. He had thought Castiel getting tough and pushing him against a wall was hot since he did it on his first day of classes and still did. That and the uniform was making Dean’s brain short circuit. 

“Yeah, but I’m your dick,” he smirked in response, knowing it was lame but not caring. It was pretty difficult to think of anything besides those angry eyes and ridiculous lips right in front of him. 

Cas crushed their mouths together and Dean immediately opened his mouth, happily letting Cas take control. Cas pressed his thigh between Dean’s legs to press against Dean’s dick, making him moan into Cas’s mouth. Dean was half-hard already and not caring where they were. He wanted more, he wanted Cas to…

Castiel jumped back, leaving Dean a breathless mess. That wasn’t he wanted at all. 

“Cas, what the fuck?” he breathed, almost a whine. Who the fuck did he think he was?

“That’s for making me half-hard just by saying what you did at breakfast,” Cas smirked. “You probably want to calm down before coming to class.”

After a bemused glance towards Dean’s crotch, he walked out of the bathroom and left a stunned and still very turned on Dean behind. That was the second time he had made him incredibly hard and then left him.

 _Fuck_ , Dean thought irritably and with amusement, _I am in love with a smug bastard._

Dean splashed some cold water on his face and tried to think of anything and everything that would make his very obvious erection go away. How Cas managed all that and was okay to go to class was beyond Dean. 

The cooling off process was mostly working and the bathroom door opened and then it definitely worked.

“Dean, right?” the boy who walked in asked. His voice had a drawl to it and could have been British or Scottish.

“Yeah. You are?” Dean asked. 

He knew he had seen the guy before but couldn’t recall his name. He had dark hair and must have been in Michael’s company. If Dean remembered correctly, this was the guy who had annoyed Cas when Dean first went into town and Michael had to intervene.

“Name’s Crowley,” he said. “We need to talk.” 

“About what?” Dean shot back. Henriksen would give him a demerit if he didn’t get to class on time.

“I know you were in Zachariah’s office last night,” Crowley stated, “I want to know why.”

“None of your damn business,” Dean spat. How this guy knew, Dean didn’t care at the moment. He tried to walk past Crowley and out of the bathroom but he didn’t let him go. 

“Dude, not in the mood. Move,” Dean tried again. 

“I want to help,” Crowley said, not budging.

“What if I don’t want your help?”

“You do,” Crowley shrugged. “I know you and old Zachariah don’t get along.”

“Understatement,” Dean rolled his eyes. 

“So maybe let me know what you were doing there so I can help.”

“No,” Dean said flatly. 

_This jackass better be getting to the point,_ Dean thought, _and fast._

“Fine,” Crowley said, crossing his arms. “I’ll guess why you busted in. It has to do with his douchebag sons and how they have been giving you and pretty boy Castiel some trouble. Right so far?”

Dean said nothing so Crowley continued.

“Get some dirt on them and they back off, maybe?”

Dean nodded this time. He didn’t trust the guy but maybe he could help with the situation.

“Let’s say you are on your last chance and any more trouble and Zachariah gives you the boot.”

“How do you…”

“I have ears,” Crowley interrupted. 

If that was true then maybe going against the man’s sons wasn’t the best move. Especially if the evidence Dean had against them was stolen from Zachariah’s office. This guy didn’t seem like the best source, though. Dean didn’t know what to think. 

“Now, I happen to know some people who can use the information you have to rough those guys up and get them to leave you alone. Then you’re in the clear.”

“Really?” Dean asked, doubtful. “Why should I trust you?”

“Good God, don’t. Never trust anyone,” Crowley responded. “But having those idiots out of the way will help me too so it’s not all for you and dear little Castiel.”

“What do you get out of it?” Dean wanted to know. 

“If those boys want to stay in this school, they will help me become a company leader next year.”

“Lucifer is probably going to take Raphael’s spot when he graduates and Michael is a junior and would just stay a company leader. Right?” Dean guessed. 

He figured that be logical even if he hadn’t been here for that long. It made sense for promotions to work that way, especially if they were Zachariah’s sons. 

“Not if I can convince them otherwise. Got it?”

“So you want to just leap frog over Lucifer?”

Crowley nodded. Lucifer was a platoon leader like Cas and Crowley was only a squad leader. It would have been highly unlikely for Crowley to become a company leader unless Lucifer didn’t accept the position. 

“He won’t give it up easily,” Dean pointed out. The guy was seriously power-hungry. 

“That’s why you are going to tell me what you have and I’ll convince them.” 

If Dean handed over the information then his leverage against Cas’s cousins was gone and in their fate was unsure. If this didn’t pan out and Crowley crossed them somehow then they were screwed. 

On the other hand, Crowley was using it for his own personal gain but Dean and Cas could stay out of trouble which would be ideal. Their hands would stay clean and the trio of tools would still have to back off. 

Crowley let Dean ponder another moment before he asked, “Do we have a deal?”

Dean agreed to let Crowley help.

~

 

Dean walked into Henriksen’s classroom, considerably late, and got a demerit from the teacher immediately. He sat down next to Cas who gave Dean a concerned look. Dean gave him a weak smile to say everything was fine.

Well, mostly fine. He was a little shaken from the conversation with Crowley. It felt a little like selling his soul to the devil but he didn’t see another option. The problem would be telling Cas.

Cas tried to talk to Dean at lunch but he shook him off. 

“Cas, I’m fine,” Dean insisted. “It just took me a while to, uh, calm down this morning. Okay?”

Dean glanced at Cas while they grabbed their food. Clearly, Cas didn’t believe him but was considerate enough to let it go, at least for the moment. Dean’s good mood from earlier was gone and he remained rather grumpy for the rest of the day. Cas left him alone for the most part because he knew how Dean got when he was in this kind of mood, even if he didn’t know why his demeanor went south. 

Outside for exercises, Raphael called for his company to line up for a run. 

The guy had a black eye and walked with a slight limp. Crowley had acted faster than Dean thought he would. He had given him the sheet with the grades when classes had ended so that was a small window before exercises started. Crowley clearly didn’t mess around.

Cas gave Dean a look who in turn, looked away with a noncommittal shrug. He hated lying to Cas but he also didn’t want to tell him what happened with Crowley. It felt dirty. He tried justify to himself that he wasn’t lying because Cas hadn’t asked him anything yet but he wasn’t telling him what happened which felt just as shitty. 

Once they were in their bedrooms doing homework, Cas came over and tried to talk to Dean.

“After lights out, I’ll come over. Okay?” Dean said.

Cas set his mouth in a hard line and left without saying a word.

“What’s going on?” Benny asked from his own desk.

“Nothing,” Dean grumbled. 

Benny dropped it but still looked concerned. Dean couldn’t focus on his homework, not now. Apparently, he was going to have to come clean to Cas and maybe Benny eventually. A nice drink would have been very welcome. Or a smoke. 

_Or pie_ , Dean thought. That gave him an idea.

He could take Cas to the cafeteria like he had done before and smooth everything over with pie. 

Once it was technically lights out, Dean snuck out of his room and over to Cas’s. He looked down each end of the hallway before he knocked lightly. When Cas opened the door, Dean took his hand and pulled him into the hall. Luckily, he was already wearing shoes.

“Dean, what…”

Dean put a finger to his lips and Cas glared but went silent. 

“Do you trust me?” Dean whispered.

Cas nodded. 

They walked hand-in-hand across the dark campus to the cafeteria. Once they were there, Dean picked the lock and let them in. It was hard to navigate through the long tables in the dark but they got to the kitchen with only one bumped knee and muttered “fuck” from Dean. 

“Finally,” Dean said, eyeing his prize. “Pie!” 

“Dean, why are we here?” Cas finally spoke up. “What if we get in trouble?”

“Pie,” Dean shrugged, as if that cleared anything up. He cut two slices and put them on a couple of plates. Cas reluctantly took one but didn’t eat as Dean dug in. He looked a little wary.

“Are you going to tell me why you’ve been acting so weird all day?” Cas said.

Dean nodded as he ate. He was going to, he just needed his pie first. Apparently, it was a good enough answer for Cas because he took a small bite of his pie. 

They ate, sitting on the counter, in comfortable silence. Dean licked his plate clean to get all of the apple pie filling and Cas made a face at him. Dean made a face back and Cas set down his half-eaten pie. 

“You don’t want to finish?” Dean asked, trying to prolong the inevitable. 

“No,” Cas said matter-of-factly. Dean sighed and figured he should start talking. 

“All right, after you, uh…. in the bathroom…” Dean scratched at the back of his neck. Honestly, just thinking about that got him warm all over. 

“Yes, that. Go on,” Cas said firmly. 

“After you left, Crowley came in,” Dean said. 

“What did he want?” Cas frowned. 

“The grades we got yesterday. He wanted them to get Lucifer to back off of being a company leader so he could take it. If Crowley had the sheet and messed with them, then we’d be in the clear. No one could bother us and we wouldn’t be in trouble,” Dean explained. 

“You just gave him the sheet? What if he turns us in for stealing it in the first place?” Cas said angrily. 

Dean hopped off the counter to stand in front of Cas. 

“He won’t. He needs it to get what he wants,” Dean said, somewhat loudly. 

“Then what?” Cas said, throwing his hands up. “Then he can screw us over when he’s done!” 

“You don’t think I didn’t think of that?” Dean snapped. 

“How would I know what you were thinking? You didn’t talk to me!” Cas yelled, jumping off the counter to be almost eye level with Dean. 

“I was trying to protect you!” Dean argued.

“Yeah? How?” Cas said, very much in Dean’s personal space. 

“We don’t have the evidence anymore! It’s just Crowley’s word against ours if they find him with the grades from Zach’s office. Your cousins have to listen to Crowley or they’re screwed. So we’re safe! From them and from getting kicked out,” Dean said. 

Cas opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out. Dean had made some good points and this looked like it could all work out in their favor. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Cas said, softly. He looked at Dean adoringly and brought a hand up to Dean’s cheek. 

“I was trying to take care of it without you having to worry,” Dean said, slightly mumbling. 

“Well, I guess that’s kind of sweet,” Cas admitted. 

“Whoa, I don’t do sweet!” Dean protested. 

“Sure,” Cas smirked. “Whatever you say.”

Dean opened his mouth to protest more but was shut up by Cas’s mouth on his. Dean got his hands on Cas’s waist and spun him to press his back against the counter they had eaten their pie on minutes before. He leaned into the kiss and his boyfriend to be completely pressed against him, moving his hips just enough to pull a moan from Cas. 

Reaching a hand between Cas’s legs, Dean rubbed over Cas’s growing erection. As he did that, he dropped his mouth from Cas’s and kissed down his jaw and neck to nibble at his earlobe and then suck at his pulse point and collarbone. 

“You know how badly I just wanna bend you over this counter and fuck you?” Dean said, without thinking. He kept moving his hand and kissing Cas’s neck but panicked that Cas would flip at what he said. Normally, he wasn’t so crass. 

Instead, Cas threw his head back further and groaned Dean’s name. Maybe that wasn’t the completely wrong thing to say. But as much as he did want to do that, he didn’t have anything he needed. No lube, condoms… but there was something else he knew his boyfriend liked. He still felt bad for not talking to Cas about making a deal with Crowley but he knew how to make it up to him.

“Fuck, Cas,” Dean said. He would have to go for Plan B. 

He slid a hand under Cas’s shirt and one into Cas’s pants. After feeling the smooth expanse of his boyfriend’s chest and stomach, Dean sunk to his knees in front of Cas. 

“Dean…” Cas said, quietly and a little out of breath, “what are…here?”

“Yeah, right here,” Dean smirked, looking up at Cas as he pulled Cas’s sweatpants down. 

“I mean, if you want me to stop…” Dean said, very slowly. 

Cas looked like he considered it but Dean pressed his mouth against Cas’s boxers and he changed his mind. 

“No…no, don’t stop,” Cas said. 

At that, Dean pulled the boxers down and out of the way and began teasing Cas with his tongue by just going over the head and slit. He had one hand on Cas’s hip and the other palming his own very hard dick over his own sweatpants as he licked up the underside of Cas’s dick. Cas was gripping the counter so tight his knuckles were white and his other hand was in Dean’s hair, lightly pulling and occasionally scratching his scalp.

Dean pulled his mouth back. 

“Wha…fuck, don’t stop, Dean,” Cas whined. 

“What do you want? You have to tell me,” Dean said, a playful smile pulling at his lips. 

Letting Cas take control was fun sometimes, every time he did was mind blowing, but as Dean made his boyfriend fall apart he was glad he was in command now. 

“Suck me off,” Cas begged, his voice wrecked, “please.”

Dean couldn’t say no to that.

Cas used a hand to gently push Dean’s head back towards his cock. Dean took him in one swallow, hollowing his cheeks. He built a rhythm, up and down, sucking and swirling with his tongue and mouth. His one hand was still on Cas’s hip to keep him from thrusting too hard into Dean’s mouth while his other hand pulled his own erection out. Matching the speed of his mouth, he stroked himself in time. 

“Dean,” Cas groaned, “Gonna…I’m close…”

It was warning enough and a few more bobs up and down had Cas spilling over the edge and down Dean’s throat. Dean’s hand on himself kept going and seeing Cas orgasm and tasting him was just what Dean needed. He reached his own climax and came on his hand and the floor. 

After he licked Cas clean, Dean stood on slightly shaky legs. Cas was supporting himself on the counter. Dean pulled his pants up then Cas’s, and put his clean hand on Cas’s hip and pressed their foreheads together. Cas kissed him gently, a hand on Dean’s shoulder and the other on the back of his neck. 

“Shit,” Dean laughed, looking down, “should probably clean that.” 

“I can’t believe you just came on the kitchen floor, Dean,” Cas said and started laughing. 

Dean started laughing too and kept laughing while he found some paper towels to clean off his hand and the floor. 

“We should go,” Dean said. 

Cas kissed him again and took his hand to lead them back to the dorm building.


	18. All Shook Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "My hands are shaky and my knees are weak, I can't seem to stand on my own two feet. Who do you thank when you have such luck? I'm in love, I'm all shook up." All Shook Up, Elvis Presley

It was May and the week before finals and the semester was wrapping up nicely. Dean, for only the second time in his life, felt completely ready for finals. Cas, again, praised him for how smart he was as they studied. It was a little easier to accept the compliment than before but Dean still struggled to believe having Cas as his boyfriend was real life. 

“What?” Cas asked, looking up from where his nose had been buried in a book for the last hour.

Dean realized he had been staring at Cas across the library table. 

“Nothing, just…” Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “I…thanks for, uh, helping me. Again.”

“You know you’re also helping me. I wouldn’t have done well in history last semester without you,” Cas pointed out. 

Dean shrugged. 

Cas tried to say something else but Dean suggested they keep studying. So they did. 

 

Since the next week was finals week, Dean called home on Benny’s cell to arrange a ride once the year was done. It felt a little crazy that he had lasted the entire year at the military school and he almost didn’t want to leave. He missed his brother but he knew he would miss his friends like crazy over the summer. Cas was a different story. They hadn’t really talked about what the summer meant for them.

“Hiya, Sammy,” Dean said when his brother answered the home phone. 

“Dean!” Sam greeted loudly. “When are you coming home?” 

“That’s what I’m calling about, little man,” Dean said, using the nickname while he could. The kid was growing like a weed and Dean wouldn’t be surprised if Sam ended up taller than him. 

They caught up briefly and set a time for John to come and pick Dean up when finals were over at the end of next week. 

“See ya soon,” Dean said.

“Bye Dean!” his kid brother said cheerfully, excited to have his big brother back home. 

Dean hung up and handed the phone back to Benny. 

They were relaxing in their room on Thursday afternoon and were supposed to be studying for finals. Exercises were cancelled to get them all to study. Benny was but Dean was lying on his bed. He was just starting to fall asleep when Cas woke him up by hitting his foot. 

“What the fuck, Cas,” Dean grumbled. He didn’t even hear the guy come in their room. 

“We have to study,” Cas stated. “Let’s go.”

Dean groaned but sat up. They had their math final on Monday to start the week and it was Dean’s least favorite and worst subject. Cas could call Dean smart until he was blue in the face but that wouldn’t change the fact that calculus made no freakin’ sense. 

Cas insisted and gave Dean no choice and hauled him off the bed while Benny chuckled a little. It was loud enough for Dean to hear and then glare at his roommate. Castiel dragged a very grumbly Dean over to his room and gently pushed him into a chair. 

“I have an idea,” Cas said.

Dean looked over at Cas who had pulled the other chair over so they were at the same desk. Dean was more than a little skeptical since the last time they were in this position Cas had got him all riled up and then didn’t help him out. If that jackass thought he was letting him do that again…

“Every time you get a question right, you get a kiss,” Cas suggested. 

“Oh, you think your kisses are that exceptional?” Dean teased. 

Cas leaned over and kissed Dean sweetly yet thoroughly which caused Dean’s mind to go blank and his breath completely leave his body. 

“I stand corrected,” Dean said softly, looking into Cas’s eyes and still getting butterflies. 

“I did learn from the best,” Cas said.

Dean laughed a little at that.

“All right, enough being cute,” Dean said, still smiling. Cas bumped his shoulder with his own.

They worked on math and Castiel held true on his promise and it was an effective method of getting Dean to work hard. Those kisses were exceptional and Dean suggested they do this every time they studied. 

“Sure,” Cas grinned. He gave his one boyfriend one more kiss before he left for the night. 

On the Saturday before finals were going to begin, a big group of them went into town for the last time of the school year. 

Cas invited Anna and she reluctantly came with them. Charlie, Garth and Benny were there and so was Gabriel before he would no doubt go find Kali. 

Dean steered clear of Anna until Cas suggested he just talk to her after they had stopped at a convenience store. As their big group walked along the sidewalk, Dean dropped back to walk with Anna when he was done talking to Charlie about their latest crazy Star Wars ideas. 

“Dean,” Anna said curtly. “What do you want?”

“To apologize,” Dean said, glancing at her. She raised her eyebrows. 

“Really?” she said. 

“Yeah and it’s long overdue,” Dean said. “It was pretty shitty of me to dance with you and everything and then just not talk to you anymore.”

“And then you started dating my cousin,” Anna pointed out. 

Dean opened his mouth but didn’t really have a response to that since it was true. Anna laughed, slightly at Dean’s expense. 

“It’s fine, actually,” Anna said. “I was just pissed you didn’t say anything mostly. But now you apologized so we’re cool.”

“Oh. Okay,” Dean said, a little surprised it was that easy. Anna was pretty chill. 

“Besides,” Anna grinned, “I met someone else.”

“That’s awesome, Anna,” Dean said genuinely. 

They kept walking and Anna started to spill a couple embarrassing stories about Cas from when he was little until Gabriel interrupted.

“All right, Anna,” Gabriel said, “enough picking on Cas.”

“I am not!” she protested. 

“Hey, back off man,” Dean said. 

“Look, just because she’s cool with you fucking Cas doesn’t mean I am,” Gabriel said. 

The entire group stopped walking in the middle of the sidewalk. 

“That’s none of your damn business,” Dean said angrily, eyes narrowed.

Gabriel took a step forward.

“Yeah, it is,” Gabriel snapped. “You’re a big brother, right? Don’t you look out for your little brother, no matter what?”

“Absolutely but I’m not going to hurt Cas,” Dean argued. 

Gabriel gave him a doubtful look and turned to face Cas. 

“Do what you want, kid,” Gabriel shrugged, “If it’s Winchester then fine. But I warned you.”

He stormed off, leaving everyone more than a little confused. 

“I mean, I knew he never liked me but…”

“Don’t worry about it, Dean,” Cas reassured. “He gets like that sometimes.”

“Like what? Sounding like your cousins?” Dean accused.

Cas set his mouth in a tight line. The entire group decided that maybe going back to school would be a good idea so they cut the trip short.

Dean and Cas didn’t talk on the walk back.

 

Finals were stressful but that was to be expected. It more stressful since things had gotten a little tense between Dean and Cas. Gabriel had been a dick and then Dean may have gone a little overboard by comparing him to their cousins so Cas was upset. Dean was upset that Cas hadn’t really come to Dean’s defense to his brother. 

Dean threw himself into studying and felt good about most of them, even calculus. History was his last one and once he walked out of there on Thursday afternoon, he was going to go pack.

Benny was already there packing up his own stuff. 

“I can’t believe the year’s over,” Dean said. 

“Me neither, brother,” Benny replied. 

Dean threw a handful of clothes into his duffel bag. John wasn’t coming until tomorrow so he had some time. 

“I’m glad you came here,” Benny said. 

“I almost am, too,” Dean joked.

“Make sure you smooth things over with your boy before you go home,” Benny instructed.

Dean nodded and gave Benny a hug and they said good-bye. 

Dean fell back onto his bed and fell asleep while thinking about what to say to Cas. 

 

Dean woke up early to two sharp knocks on the door. He hadn’t slept well and was wearing only sweatpants. He got up and opened the door. 

“Henriksen? I thought room inspections were done.”

“Winchester, Zachariah Milton would like to see you in his office,” Henriksen said. 

“Fuck,” Dean cursed. “I mean…”

“It’s fine, kid,” Henriksen laughed. 

Dean was a little surprised at the noise. He didn’t think he had heard the man laugh during the entire time he had been at the military academy. 

“You want to know why I was so tough on you this year?” Henriksen said.

“Because you’re an ass?” Dean tried.

“I’m gonna let that slide because this is the last day,” Henriksen laughed again. “It’s because you remind me of myself at your age. My old man wanted me to join the military and I didn’t want to so I was a little shit just like you.”

Dean shrugged. The teacher wasn’t wrong. 

“I had a mentor that set me straight and made into the man I am today. I figured you just needed a little guidance,” Henriksen continued. 

“Do you think it worked?” Dean smirked.

“Well, you got a one hundred percent on my final and you’re the first kid to do that, so I’d say so,” Henriksen said.

“No shit?” Dean said, mouth agape. 

“No shit,” Henriksen smiled, “now go see what old man Milton wants.”

“Thanks,” Dean said and shook Henriksen’s hand. 

Quickly, Dean threw on fresh boxers, jeans and a t-shirt before lacing up his boots. There was no way this meeting with Zachariah was going to be good. 

Dean hurried over to the administration building, taking a moment to remember the first day he was here and practically ran out of this same building after meeting Zachariah.

 _Wow_ , Dean thought, _Everything is so much different._

Dean got up to Zachariah’s office and knocked. 

“Winchester,” he barked, “about time. Sit down.”

Dean listened. 

“Ever seen this before?” the man asked. 

Zachariah slid a piece of paper across the desk. It was the grade sheet he had stolen. 

“No sir,” Dean said, praying that his poker face was working. 

“Interesting,” Zachariah said, leaning back in his chair, “That’s not what I heard.”

Dean didn’t break eye contact. If this asshole wanted him to break down and confess, he was going to be waiting a long time.

“I think that you broke into my office and stole this,” Zachariah said. 

“I doubt you have proof of that,” Dean said, trying to sound unconcerned. 

“Just your word against one of my squad leaders,” Zachariah said, a creepy grin stretched across his face.

Dean felt his stomach sink and feared the worst. Of course Crowley screwed them. If that little bastard sold out Dean’s friends too, he’d kill him.

“Now, this unnamed squad leader tried to go behind my back to the board to get my sons kicked out using this little piece of paper. When the board asked where he got it, he was more than happy to give you up.”

“The board didn’t care that your dipshit sons were failing?” Dean snapped. If he was going down, he wasn’t going down without a fight. 

“Watch it, Winchester,” Zachariah said harshly. 

“Let me guess, you have the board in your pocket? They wouldn’t dare make a move against you?” Dean said. 

Zachariah grinned again but otherwise ignored his comment. 

“Your father has already been informed that you will not be returning to Lawrence Military Academy in the fall,” Zachariah said with finality. 

Dean just nodded, all of his fight gone. He could have seen that coming from a mile away when this conversation started. Of course Zachariah believed Crowley and the board wasn’t going to do anything.

He left the office shocked at how disappointed he was. At the beginning of the year, when he first got here, getting kicked out would have been a blessing. Now, not so much. It was just disappointing. 

Dean still had several hours before his dad would arrive and would be more than pissed. He didn’t want to pack yet so he walked around the campus. Why not check it out one last time? 

He found himself on a part of campus he hadn’t been on before. There was a tiny garden tucked behind the science building that he had never seen before since he had always walked from the other direction. 

Dean pushed the gate open and walked in only to find someone already there. 

“Cas?” Dean said. “What are you doing here?”

“Dean?” Cas asked, just as shocked. “This is where I like to go to escape… well, everything. I came here after the dance, too.”

“In the winter?”

“Yes,” Cas said, “but why are you here?”

“I…” Dean said, the reality of it all hitting him hard as he looked at Cas. 

Tears started to fill in his eyes and threatened to spill over. Any argument they had before didn't seem to matter and all was forgiven. 

“Dean, what’s wrong?” Cas said gently. He led them both to a bench to sit down. Dean would have appreciated the flowers and bees more if his mood wasn’t so crappy. It really was a beautiful garden.

“Met with Zach. Crowley sold me out, just like you said he would,” Dean said, not meeting Cas’s eyes. “He tried to take it to the board but they just asked where he got the grades and he squealed.”

Cas just grabbed Dean’s hand and let him take a deep breath before continuing. 

“He only named me, I think, so you and everyone else should be okay.”

“Dean, you can’t be the only one to take the fall for this, I’ll talk to Zachariah…”

“No,” Dean snapped sharply. Cas flinched a little but didn’t let go of Dean’s hand.

“Why not?” Cas asked. 

“He only kicked me out,” Dean explained, “I can’t have you all get kicked out, too.”

“Dean, that isn’t your decision to make.”

“Yes, it is,” Dean said firmly. “It was stupid to make the deal with Crowley so this is on me. You guys stay and have fun here. I’ll go home, deal with my dad and take care of Sam like always.”

“You can’t just go,” Cas pleaded. 

“Come on, Cas. You’ll be fine. Next year, some new bad boy will roll in here and piss you off enough until you date him and you can live happily ever after.”

“What, just because you’re leaving we’re over?” Cas asked with a shaky voice. 

“I…just thought, uh,” Dean stammered. Why would Cas want to stay with him? He was clearly a huge fuck-up, more so than ever.

“Benny was right,” Cas said, letting go of Dean’s hand and standing up. 

“About what?” Dean asked, standing up as well. What did Benny have to do with anything?

“I love you too, you big idiot,” Cas said, looking deep into Dean’s eyes and meaning it. 

“You heard that?” Dean said, recalling his conversation in his room with Benny after spring break. That felt like ages ago. Now, his heart leapt hearing Cas say that.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” 

“I figured you’d tell me when you were ready,” Cas shrugged. “I wasn’t in a hurry. In case you didn’t catch on, I’m in this for the long haul, Dean.”

Dean stepped forward and grabbed Cas’s face to kiss him. Hearing that was certainly a good way to make a terrible day better. God, he was an idiot for not saying it sooner. 

“I love you, Cas,” Dean said, when he finally broke the kiss. 

It was the first time he had really said that he loved someone like that and it didn’t freak him out nearly as much as he had imagined.

“I love you too, Dean.”

 

Dean still had about an hour and a half before a more than likely pissed off John would be coming to pick him up and he still had to pack. Cas had decided he had spent enough time with the bees in the garden and came with. 

There wasn’t a lot more for Dean to pack so he was done relatively quickly. 

“Well, now what?” Dean said. They were sitting on his still made bed.

Cas answered by kissing Dean. Since he was going to be leaving, Dean kissed back passionately. He gently guided Cas onto his back and crawled above him. The door was shut and locked and since Dean didn’t know when they could do this again, he pulled his shirt off. 

He got Cas’s shirt off and kissed down his jaw, neck and chest to lightly tongue over a nipple. Cas arched his back and moaned so Dean did the same thing to the other nipple. 

Cas pulled Dean back up into a searing kiss. 

“Dean, please. I need you to…” his voice trailed off. 

“To what?” Dean said. Partially to tease and partially because he didn’t want to do anything without Cas saying it was okay. 

“Fuck me. Dean, I need you to fuck me,” Cas groaned. 

Dean got even harder hearing Cas talk like that in his low, sexy voice. He kissed him and rubbed their hips together, layers of clothes getting in the way. They got their pants off and Dean climbed off of Cas. 

“What…” Cas whined. 

“Lube, Cas,” Dean explained. He had picked some up, and condoms, the last time they were in town. 

He returned to his boyfriend, sprawled naked on his bed, and kissed him. 

“Dean, come on,” Cas begged. 

“I’m gonna take my time,” Dean said. “It’s our first time and I’m doing it right.”

He kissed down Cas’s chest and stomach slowly and took his erection in his mouth. He bobbed up and down a few times, Cas’s hand in his hair, before pulling off. After lubing one finger, he pressed into Cas while resuming sucking his dick. 

The noises Cas made were keeping Dean hard as he worked him open, finger by finger. He stopped sucking only so Cas wouldn’t come yet. Dean knew him well enough to know that he was very close. His three fingers kept moving inside Cas. 

“Dean,” Cas begged, “please. I’m ready. Just fuck me.” 

Dean got into place above Cas and kissed him. Cas lifted his legs to squeeze them around Dean’s hips and lock his ankles behind his back. Dean rolled on a condom and rubbed lube over his length. 

"Ready?" Dean asked.

Cas nodded. Cas moaned loudly as Dean pressed inside him. He gave Cas a second to adjust and then slowly pulled out, almost all the way, before sliding back in slowly.

Cas moaned again and begged for Dean to go faster and harder and Dean listened. He kept thrusting into Cas until he groaned he was close. 

Dean reached between them to pump Cas’s dick to match the rhythm of his thrusts. It only took a few thrusts and pumps before Cas spilled over his hand and Dean spilled inside Cas. 

They were breathing hard and Dean wanted nothing more than to fall asleep with Cas but he couldn’t, not yet. He kissed Cas and got up, throwing the condom in the little garbage can. Dean figured that was the best parting gift he could leave this place. 

He checked his watch for the time. 

“Fuck,” Dean cursed. 

His dad was going to be there in ten minutes.


	19. When The Levee Breaks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Cryin' won't help you, prayin' won't do you no good. Now, cryin' won't help you, prayin' won't do you no good. When the levee breaks, mama, you got to move." When The Levee Breaks, Led Zeppelin

Dean grabbed his bags and hurried to the front gate with Cas following him. The two of them stood awkwardly, not really sure what to say. Dean knew he was in deep shit and wasn’t sure when he could see Cas again. 

Cas stood next to him, holding his hand. He dropped it when the Impala came into sight. 

“Bye Cas,” Dean said, looking into his boyfriend’s tear-filled eyes, “I love you.” 

“I love you too, Dean,” Cas replied. 

Dean wanted to kiss Cas so bad or at least hug him but he couldn’t risk that with John so close. Cas took several steps back as the Impala parked near them. 

“Get your ass in the car, boy,” John barked through an open window. 

Dean silently got into the car after he threw the bags into the backseat. He spared a glance at Cas as his Dad sped off, watching his boyfriend raise a hand as a wave goodbye. The gesture caused a pang of sadness in his gut and his eyes threatened to tear up. He quickly blinked them away since he was with his dad.

Man, if someone had told Dean at the beginning of the school year that he would have been sorry to see this place in the rearview mirror, he would have said they were fucking nuts. Well, it wasn’t so much the place as the people. He would miss Cas like crazy and he didn’t even get a chance to tell Benny and Charlie that he wasn’t coming back.

“How did you fuck up that bad, Dean?” John snapped. 

“I didn’t…”

“Really?” John asked, taking a right turn way too fast. “So you didn’t steal from Zachariah’s office?”

“Well yeah but…”

“I raised you better than that.”

Dean wanted to scream that he practically raised himself and Sam. He wanted to shout that he stole the grades to protect himself and his boyfriend but that would have gone over like a ton of bricks so he kept his mouth shut. He didn’t know if Zachariah had said anything about him and Cas’s relationship so he figured it was best not to ask in case John was still in the dark. 

John let out a deep sigh. His erratic driving calmed down a little.

“What am I supposed to do with you now?” He shook his head. “What would your mother say?”

It was the absolute worst line John used and Dean hated him for it because he knew. He knew his mother would be proud of him for trying to protect someone he loved. He just looked at his hands in his lap and let the car ride continue in silence. 

Once they were home, John hung around in the living room. Dean took his stuff into his room to unpack and Sam followed. He kept his face as neutral as he could since he was happy to see Sam and didn’t want to explain why he was upset.

The kid fired off a million questions. 

“How were finals, scary?” 

“Not that bad,” Dean answered while putting some clothes away.

“What are you going to do this summer?” Sam continued.

“Not sure.”

“Is Cas going to visit again?”

Dean’s stomach dropped and he missed Cas all over again. He pulled out the AC/DC poster he had gotten from Cas and rolled it under his bed. It didn’t feel like just an hour ago he had been having sex with Cas. 

“Uh, maybe,” Dean said distractedly. “You hungry?”

Sam nodded. 

Dean walked into the kitchen and was happy to see that it was much better stocked than when he had been home last. It was bad enough John drank the way he did but he could at least make sure Sam had some food to eat. 

He pulled out everything he needed to make some spaghetti and sauce. He even found some frozen meatballs he could microwave. He got to work and quickly made everything. It helped him relax and kept his mind mostly blank for a little bit. 

To call dinner tense would have been an understatement. Dean wasn’t in the mood to talk much and John was never a big talker either. Sam attempted to carry the conversation but after not getting much from the other he gave up and they ate in silence. 

John went out to drink like usual. Sam and Dean eventually went off to bed. Sam tried asking more questions but Dean didn’t really want to talk about anything but Sam knew that something was up. He always did.

“Dean, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, Sammy,” Dean lied, “go to sleep.”

“Come on, you can tell me. I’m your little brother!”

“I got kicked out of school and I don’t know when I can see Cas again, okay?” Dean said, a little harshly. 

“Oh,” Sam said in a small voice.

There was a long pause. 

“I’m sorry, Dean.”

“It’ll be fine,” Dean said, trying to believe it. 

Gradually, Sam’s breathing evened out. Dean couldn’t stand being in his bed without Cas so he got up and snuck into the kitchen. He reached the liquor cabinet and grabbed a bottle of his dad’s whiskey. 

He walked into their tiny backyard and sat down in an old chair on the tiny patio. It wasn’t much more than a large slab of concrete. Only a little bit of grass stretched from between the edge of the patio and a fence. 

Dean had brought his cigarettes with him and lit one as he drank the whiskey straight from the bottle. It burned but he didn’t care. He wasn’t drinking it for the taste. 

He sat there in his boxers, smoking and drinking, for a while. He had no idea how long. The bottle was significantly lower than when he started and there were four cigarette butts under his feet. 

In the dark, he remained motionless as he heard his dad stumble back in. That was evidence enough that he had been outside long enough. After a few more minutes to let his dad pass out, he slowly stood up. He had to hold the chair with one hand for support as the alcohol hit him hard. 

Carefully, he snuck back inside and slipped the bottle back where he found it. His mind was blissfully blank as he fell asleep.

 

“Dean, wake up.”

Dean groaned in response. He felt like shit and he hadn’t even opened his eyes. His stomach was protesting any movement and his brain was pounding. 

“Dean, are you okay?”

Dean grunted into his pillow in response. 

He must have fallen back asleep because the next thing that happened was the smell of food. It was a conflicting smell because he knew he should eat but he wasn’t sure how it would sit with him.

“Dean,” Sam said, firmly enough for Dean to open one eye. “Eat.”

Dean looked to see that Sam was holding a plate with two pieces of toast and a glass of orange juice. 

He ate, slowly, without sitting up. Sam sat crossed legged on the floor next to his big brother’s bed. 

“Are you sick?” the kid asked. 

“Technically.”

“What’s wrong?”

What wasn’t wrong? Dean felt like yelling. He wasn’t with Cas and he missed him. He was hungover. He got kicked out of school. He missed his friends. 

“No clue,” Dean lied. He started on the second piece of toast. 

Sam looked at him with a hint of disbelief but let him eat in peace. 

Once the toast was gone, he drank the juice. His stomach was a lot better but his head was still killing him. 

“You good if I sleep a little more?” Dean asked. 

“Yeah,” Sam rolled his eyes. “I’m thirteen now, remember?”

Dean nodded and fell back asleep. 

 

Dean had been home for a week and had pretty much just been moping around. He didn’t want to drink after that first night home and his terrible hangover but when he couldn’t sleep he still snuck outside to smoke. 

He was home alone while Sam still had school and his dad was at work at the garage. His attendance there was spotty so it was a good thing he was friends with the owner or his ass would have been fired a long time ago. 

The TV was on but Dean wasn’t paying attention when the phone rang. Figuring it was a telemarketer or something like that, Dean took his time going over to answer the phone. 

“Hello?” he asked in a bored voice.

“Dean?”

“Cas?” 

“Hello Dean,” Cas said. “Benny gave me this number, I hope you don’t mind.”

Dean almost dropped the phone in excitement. 

“Not at all! Fuck, it is good to hear your voice, man,” Dean said with a smile. 

“You too. How are you?”

“Uh, not too hot,” Dean admitted. “My dad is still pissed and I miss you.”

“I miss you too. That’s why I want to come visit,” Cas said.

“I would love that, honestly, but my dad…”

“I’ll show up when he’s gone,” Cas tried.

“All right,” Dean gave in. “Try next weekend. He’s got a poker thing with a bunch of his buddies and won’t be around.”

“Okay. I’ll try to call before I just show up.”

“Okay,” Dean said. “I’ll, uh, see you then.”

“See you then. Bye Dean.”

That phone call put Dean into a good mood for the rest of the day. Sam came home from school and immediately got to working on homework at the kitchen table. 

“What are you so happy about?” Sam asked. He had noticed Dean’s sour mood as of late and seemed glad his brother was doing better.

“Cas is going to try to visit next weekend but you can’t tell dad,” Dean said, grinning at the thought.

“You got it,” Sam said. He made the “my lips are sealed” gesture and got back to his homework.

Dean got started on dinner, chicken and potatoes, and whistled while he did so. John came home and immediately started grumbling about Dean’s whistling. Dean, not letting his father ruin his mood, decided to hum quietly instead.

As they all ate together, Dean couldn’t think of the last time that had eaten so many dinners in a row as a family. He looked to Sam who must have thinking the same thing and shrugged. 

 

The rest of the next week was more of what Dean expected. John was barely around and Sam was at school. It was late May and he had school through the end of the week. 

Cas called again on Friday afternoon to ask when he could show up. Apparently, Gabriel was letting him use his car which surprised Dean. 

“I think my dad should be gone or drunk for the next couple of days. You can come tonight after dinner and we’ll sneak you in,” Dean said.

“All right, I’ll see you then,” Cas replied.

“Bye Cas.”

Dean cleaned the house a little to give himself something to do. There were still a few hours until Cas was going to arrive. John made a brief appearance before disappearing off to poker. Since one of his buddies lived close to the bar that hosted the poker tournament, Dean figured his dad would crash there for the night.

“What are your plans for the night, Sam?” Dean asked as they ate pizza. It was a cheap one that you just throw in the oven. 

“I’m going over to Jess’s,” Sam answered. “I’m staying the night.”

“Her parents know that?” 

“No, they’re out of town.”

“Sam…” Dean said in his best disapproving parent-style voice and fixed him with a look.

“What? We just want to watch movies and hang out together!” Sam said defensively. 

“No funny business. Got it?” Dean said firmly. Maybe he made stupid choices when he was thirteen but that didn’t mean Sam should, too. 

“Got it.”

Sam had to walk to Jess’s since their dad took the car and Dean couldn’t drive him. Dean stood in the living room, eyes glued to the street waiting for Cas.

Finally, an old and beat-up gold car stopped on the street outside of his house. 

When Dean opened the door to let Cas in, he couldn’t help but look over his shoulder and let out a laugh.

“Are you laughing at Gabriel’s car?” Cas asked.

“Yeah, a little,” Dean said as he shut the door behind them. 

It felt like no time had passed since he had seen his boyfriend last. There was their usual banter that Dean was scared they might lose. It seemed like Cas still wasn’t bored of him yet. 

“Well it’s how I got it here so maybe not don’t knock it too harshly.”

Dean pulled Cas into a kiss and could feel Cas smile against his mouth. 

“I fucking missed you,” Dean said.

“Same,” Cas breathed. 

Dean rested their foreheads together.

“Are you hungry or thirsty or something?” Dean asked, trying to be a good host. 

“I have a better idea,” Cas said, his mischievous glint in his eyes.

“Yeah, what’s that?” Dean smirked. 

“How about I show you?”

Cas pulled Dean into a kiss, moving his head to deepen the kiss. He carefully pushed Dean backwards while still kissing him. Fuck, the boy could kiss. Dean had missed the taste of Cas so bad. And his smell. And his hands. Everything. 

They got to Dean’s room and Cas pushed Dean on the bed before crawling on top of him. Cas slid one hand under Dean’s shirt before he pulled it off. Dean worked his hands under Cas’s shirt and threw it in the general direction of where his own went. 

Pants were about to go next when they froze. They heard footsteps in the house. Dean looked up at Cas and saw the same panicked look he probably had. The front door opening hadn’t been loud enough to interrupt them. Dean was praying it was Sam but he knew deep down it wasn’t.

“Dean?” John grumbled. “Who’s fucking car is that?”

It sounded like his dad was drunk but not drunk enough that he was going to ignore them. Before they could react and Cas could get up, John walked into the doorway. 

“Dean, answer me when…” 

Cas got off of Dean and Dean sat up but it was too late. 

“WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?” John bellowed. “Again? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!”

“Dad, please…just…” Dean tried. 

“I let you stay here!” John said, glaring at Cas as he recognized him. 

Cas didn’t know what to say. Dean didn’t either. They both stood there, shirtless, as John clenched and unclenched his fists. 

“You lied to me. You said this was done, this gay shit,” John accused. 

Dean opened his mouth to answer but couldn’t think of an answer. Clearly, he wasn’t done and John just saw that so there was nothing to really say. 

In a blink of an eye, John began to charge. It didn’t matter which boy he was going for, Dean threw himself forward to stop him. Using everything he had, he backed John against the wall and held him there. John was a lot bigger and stronger and Dean knew he couldn’t hold him long.

“Cas, get out of here,” Dean said. 

“No, not wi…”

“GO!” Dean yelled. 

He didn’t look, just put all his effort in holding John who was trying damn hard to break free. Footsteps told Dean that Cas had grabbed his shirt and left. 

John finally overpowered Dean and shoved him. It took all of Dean’s muscles to keep from falling over. He maneuvered into the doorway to make sure John didn’t try to follow Cas. 

“What did I tell you last time?” John asked, glaring hard and breathing heavy. 

“It doesn’t matter,” Dean sighed. “You can’t change me. Or fix me. I’m not broken. This is who I am.”

John didn’t like that answer. 

His fist connected with Dean’s cheek. The other hand came flying and Dean blocked it but another shot to his stomach knocked him down. As Dean tried to get up, another punch hit his face. One final kick to his ribs and John was done. 

“You disgust me,” John spat. 

Dean stayed on the floor of his room and listened to the front door open and close. Whatever his dad came back for in the first place, it didn’t matter. Dean felt empty and didn’t want to get up. His father hated him and he had almost hurt Cas. 

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed on the floor but eventually he got up. He walked past the mirror in the hallway and got a glimpse of his face. There were two nasty bruises already forming from John’s fists and marks from where his face had been on the carpet for too long.

Dean looked away. 

He got to the phone in the kitchen and used the caller ID to get Cas’s number and call him. 

“Dean? Please tell me that’s you. Are you all right?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. He’s gone,” Dean said. He exhaled and then winced. His whole side hurt and it was possible that John’s last kick cracked at least one rib.

“Do you need to stay somewhere else? I can come back…”

“No, it’s fine,” Dean cut him off. “I have to make sure he cools down and doesn’t hurt Sam.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

“Is there somewhere else you could go?”

Dean’s mind went to Bobby but he was hours away and John had the car. 

“No. Honestly, I’ll be fine. This isn’t the worst he’s done, just the worst in a while.”

“Promise me you’ll be okay,” Cas said firmly. 

“I will be okay, Cas,” Dean said, wishing he could believe it. 

“Okay. I love you, Dean.”

“I love you, too.”

 

The next morning was brutal. John was already at the kitchen table with Sam when Dean woke up and strolled in. Dean didn’t need a mirror to know his face probably looked like crap, the pain was enough. Anger boiled inside him as he looked at John, sitting at the table. He was calm like nothing had happened.

“What’s going on?” Dean asked. He ignored the concerned look Sam shot him at the state of his face. 

“I’ve decided this isn’t a good environment for you boys anymore,” John said.

“What are you talking about?” Dean asked.

“This town. It was the start of all your…”John paused. “mistakes.”

“Mistakes?” Dean shouted. He was not about to let his father call Cas a mistake. “Are you kidding me?”

“Your attitude, for another thing,” John said. “So we’re moving.”

“What?” Dean and Sam said at the same time. 

“Couple days, when Sam is done with school. I just need to get some things in order and we’re gone,” John continued. 

“You can’t,” Dean said, almost pleading.

“What about Jess?” Sam asked. Dean felt really guilty then because their dad was doing this because of him.

“I’ll leave. Become an emancipated teen,” Dean argued. 

“Good luck,” John scoffed. “You need a job usually. Also, if you do that I’ll make sure you never see Sam again.”

Dean didn’t say anything so he glared instead. None of this was fair. He and Sam both had to suffer because their dad was such a bigot? Dean had been pretty sure it would be a while until he saw Cas again but now it was looking near impossible. 

“Where are we going?” Sam asked, tears in his eyes.

“South Dakota with Bobby.”

“He’s on board with you uprooting us?” Dean snapped. 

“It’s not his decision,” John replied coolly. 

John decided to let the whole thing sink in and said he had a few errands to run to get everything in order. Sam went into their room and slammed the door. Dean needed to figure out how to apologize to Sam but before that he had to call Cas.

“Hello?”

“Cas, it’s me,” Dean answered. 

“Dean, are you all right?”

“Uh, mostly?” Dean lied before he admitted, “no. I’m not.”

“What’s wrong?” Cas asked, voice laced with worry. Dean took a deep breath.

“We’re moving,” Dean said. “My dad’s taking us to South Dakota.”

“That…he can’t! You can come stay here, you and Sam, and…”

“Cas, that won’t work,” Dean said, one tear rolling down his cheek.

“So what then?” Cas asked. 

“It means goodbye,” Dean said, squeezing his eyes shut. 

“No, Dean, it can’t. It can’t mean goodbye!” Cas said, pleading into the phone.

“I don’t have a choice.”

“You always have a choice, that’s what you taught me,” Cas said.

“I love you, you know that, but it just…we…” Dean tried.

“Don’t do this, Dean. I love you and you can’t…”

“I’m sorry, Cas. You were always too good for me. You can start over with someone else.”

“Even if that were true, I wouldn’t want to. Dean, please…”

“I’m sorry,” Dean repeated. 

Despite Cas shouting his name into the phone, Dean hung up. He had to do it. It wasn’t fair to Cas to have him hanging on to someone far away, someone who it was dangerous to be with. John could have hurt him and still could if he saw Cas again so Dean had to do this. 

Dean sank against the wall and dropped his head against his knees. The phone rang and Dean knew it was Cas so he didn’t get up. He kept calling so on the fifth time, Dean got up and hit the phone until it fell from the wall. He then kicked it across the room and sank back against the wall.

John came home and found Dean there and yelled at him for destroying the phone but Dean didn’t listen. He didn’t care what he had to say anyways. Dean focused on the pain in his hand where he fucked it up pretty bad instead of the pain of leaving Cas.


	20. Ramble On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sometimes I grow so tired, but I know I've got one thing I got to do. Ramble on and now's the time, the time is now, to sing my song. I'm going around the world, I got to find my girl, on my way." Ramble On, Led Zeppelin

The ride to Bobby’s had been long, boring and quiet. Dean had curled up in the backseat and let Sam take shotgun. When Sam tried to talk to him, he had pretended to be asleep. Dean tried to actually fall asleep but he couldn’t. His mind kept replaying the phone call and he kept hearing Cas’s heartbroken voice. Dean hated himself for making Cas sound like that but he knew he had no choice leaving him.

Now, he was holed up in the room he usually took at Bobby’s house when they visited. He would be sharing it with Sam but he locked the door for now so Sam took the hint and went downstairs. Ellen, Bobby and Jo tried to talk to him but he told them all to go away. 

The only person he wanted to talk to was Cas and that was impossible. He was several hours away and Dean had stupidly smashed their house phone before getting his cell number. Besides, Cas probably didn’t want to talk to him ever again and Dean wouldn’t blame him. 

It was better this way, Dean tried to tell himself. He didn’t believe it but he had to. There was no way he was the best guy for Cas when he put him in danger and couldn’t even see him now. What kind of future could they possibly have? Cas could be successful doing whatever he wanted and Dean would be another useless dropout. 

He lay on the bed facing the wall and when it got dark he unlocked the door so Sam could come and sleep when he wanted to. 

Dean only got a couple hours of troubled sleep where he dreamed that Cas was in his nice, formal uniform at the winter dance and kissing someone else. 

After that, he got up and went to the bathroom and almost threw up. He looked like shit and felt even worse. He splashed water on his face and brushed his teeth before he joined everyone for breakfast and didn’t say a single word. When he was done, he walked out into the backyard and wandered around the salvage yard filled with old junkers.

He found one as far away from the house as possible and climbed on to the hood and leaned against the windshield. The rest of the morning was spent alone in self-pity and chain smoking. On the next run into town, he would need more cigarettes. 

The Winchesters had been there for a week when Dean finally really spoke to anyone in sentences that were longer than one word if at all. He asked Bobby if he could work on some of the cars and if he wouldn’t mind giving him a hand once in a while. Bobby agreed and said he would love the help.

“Why don’t you ask your old man?” John asked snidely. 

It was one of the only things John had said to him since they had been there. Dean knew he didn’t really mean it and he was just being an ass. John looked at him differently now and probably didn’t want to spend time with anymore anyways. His dad had continued going to bars and drinking which wasn’t a surprise to anyone.

Dean glared at his dad before going outside by the cars to get started. 

There were countless old Fords and Chevys in varying states of disarray and Dean couldn’t wait to get started on them. He knew enough from his dad to get going and he could ask Bobby if he had any questions on tougher projects. There was no way he was asking his father for anything. 

Dean continued to work on the cars into June and gradually talked more and more to Jo and Ellen. He teased Jo about boys her age and messed with her ponytail and spent time cooking and baking with Ellen in the kitchen. They regularly made dinner and baked pies. One time John tried to make a poor joke about how he wasn’t surprised that someone like Dean was baking. Dean was going to cuss him out, consequences be damned, but Ellen did the job just fine. For the millionth time, Dean reminded himself not to get on her bad side.

Bobby was always gruff and not big on words or feelings but was always willing to help Dean with the cars. The old man still had a few tricks up his sleeve that he was happy to teach to Dean. John might have told Bobby why they were there and what had happened but he didn’t ask anything or bring it up so Dean didn’t mention it either. 

Dean steered clear of John. Anytime they got near each other Dean just wanted to yell. Of course Dean still talked to Sam, mostly about movies to watch or where to wander around town. 

On one of their trips into town, Dean could have sworn he caught a glimpse of Cas. It didn’t make sense for the guy to be in Sioux Falls but Dean didn’t think, just reacted. He chased after the guy when he was done buying cigarettes but of course it wasn’t him. It was the same dark hair and messy the same way. Dean sat down on the curb until Sam found him twenty minutes later. 

“Dean, you okay?”

“What?” Dean asked, looking up at his brother. “Yeah, fine.”

He brushed it off even when Sam asked again on their way home. 

He never gave specifics to Ellen or Jo about why they moved because he didn’t want to open that up. Dean knew if he talked about it he would get upset or worse, start crying. The work on the cars was a great way to not think about Cas for a little while but he did anyways the rest of the time, all the time. Every time he did he wanted a stiff drink or a smoke but would usually only get the latter. Bobby kept his booze under lock and key, mostly to keep John out, so Dean was out of luck there. 

Dean tried to see if any local people his age he met in town where interested in anything with him, something to distract himself from his thoughts, but it never panned out. Either they weren’t interested because they were in a relationship, although one girl strongly considered cheating, or the guy turned out not to be into guys which Dean learned the painfully hard way once. Sam wasn’t the only one to notice the black eye but was the only one to say anything but Dean pretended it was nothing, just an argument hustling pool.

But Dean also couldn’t do anything with anyone because he just couldn’t. It would be better for both of them to move on with their lives but he was still pathetically in love with Cas, in the best and worst ways possible. Other people wouldn’t fill the hole he felt, no matter how hard he tried.

At the end of June, Sam started bringing a girl his age around to hang out that he said he had met in town. She had dark hair and a bad attitude and they were all pretty wary of her. 

“Sam, I don’t like that girl you’ve been bringing around,” Dean said after she’d been over a few times. The two of them were sitting on Bobby’s back porch watching the sunset and eating ice cream.

“Why don’t you like Ruby?” his little brother asked. 

“I just don’t, I think she’s bad news.”

She dressed like she was trying too hard to be cool and had been generally rude to everyone except Sam. The kid just scoffed and kept eating ice cream. 

“What about Jess?” Dean asked. There was no way his brother could leave that sweet girl for that Ruby mess.

“It’s kind of hard to see her when she’s so far away,” Sam said in a slightly harsh tone that seemed to come out of nowhere. 

“Dude…” Dean said, shocked at his brother’s tone. 

“What?” Sam snapped. “You’re allowed to be pissed we left but I’m not? You’re not the only one who had to leave someone behind you know.”

Dean sighed. He had been so wrapped up in his own problems and missing Cas that he didn’t think about his brother and how much the kid must miss Jess. It was a selfish, dick move. 

“I’m sorry,” Dean said, “I know it’s my fault we had to leave.”

“I don’t blame you for us leaving Lawrence, Dean. I know that’s on Dad. It’s been hard for you and I get it, probably better than anyone. I just want you to know that and that you can talk to me, okay?”

“All right,” Dean agreed and finished his ice cream. 

He went back inside and collapsed on his bed. Sure, he could talk to Sam but what would that do? It wouldn’t move them back home to Kansas or convince Cas to take him back. Some shit Dean just had to deal with himself and this fell in that category. 

 

The Fourth of July was something special. Ellen baked a bunch of pies with Dean’s help, Bobby was grilling up amazing smelling burgers and Jo had the easy task of cutting up some watermelon. John’s contribution was beer but he was making progress on those all on his own with minimal help from Bobby. 

Sam and Dean put themselves in charge of fireworks. 

Once they ate their food, John went inside and presumably was going to pass out. Ellen and Bobby were trying to hide that they were holding hands under the table but Dean saw. He smiled sadly. He was glad for them but it made him think of Cas. Dean figured Cas was stuck with his mostly horrible family right now and maybe Gabriel was chasing him with sparklers. That thought made Dean a little happier. Wherever Cas was, Dean just hoped he was happy. Hell, maybe he had moved on. That thought made Dean want to lose all the food he just ate and he knew that wasn’t fair to be upset at that. He should let Cas go but he couldn’t.

“Dean, come on!” Sam interrupted his thoughts. “Let’s go!”

It was finally dark enough for fireworks so Sam and Dean got started with the show. 

“Be careful, idjits,” Bobby said sternly. 

Thankfully, the sky was lit with the fireworks without either brother losing any extremities. 

 

Once August came, Sam started to think about going to school. Dean didn’t give a shit about school, even less than ever before, but he knew Sam did so they went to talk to Bobby out by the cars he was working on.

“Bobby, what is this guy supposed to do about school?” Dean asked, gesturing at Sam.

“We have those out here, don’t worry,” Bobby responded, “What kind of place do you think this is?”

“Do we have to register him or something?” Dean asked.

“Already did. And stop saying ‘him’ like just he’s going. I signed you up too because I know you have a year left, kid,” Bobby said, sounding muffled with his face under the hood of a pickup. 

“Thanks Bobby!” Sam exclaimed and ran back to the house.

“I have to go?” Dean complained.

“If you’re living under my roof then yes you do,” Bobby answered. “Now make yourself useful and get me a monkey wrench.”

Dean almost poked fun at the old man’s soft side he was dangerously close to showing but decided to just laugh to himself and hand him the wrench.

 

Dean and Bobby finished work on the pickup a couple days later and grabbed some beers to sit on the porch and drink. Dean was underage but Bobby didn’t care as long as he wasn’t touching the hard stuff. Dean hated to lie to Bobby but did when he said he only drank beer. There was already a fear deep in Dean that he would turn out as shitty as his father and he didn’t need Bobby worrying about him.

“I don’t why John uprooted you boys but I’m glad you’re here,” Bobby said, sitting in a rocking chair on his back porch.

“Aw, you big ol’ sap,” Dean smirked.

“I’m glad because I needed help with the cars, don’t be an ass,” Bobby said, no real bite to his words. 

Dean laughed, a loud and full laugh, for the first time in what felt like ages. He certainly figured it had been a long time at least. 

They drank in comfortable silence just enjoying a job well done and a beautiful August day. They finished their first cans and Dean went inside to grab two more.

Jo was in the kitchen working on flipping her little knife around in her hand. 

“Hey Dean,” she said.

“Hi Jo. What’s up?” Dean answered, opening the fridge. 

“Nothing,” she shrugged. “Well, I was talking to Sam earlier.”

“Okay?” Dean said, not sure where she was going with this. 

“He said you’re in love with someone,” Jo said, pausing her knife twisting.

Dean stepped in front of her, trying to use his height to intimidate her but she didn’t budge. 

“That so?” he challenged. 

“Yeah, someone named Cas.”

“That all he said?” Dean asked. He didn’t really like the idea of Sam and Jo talking about him at all and especially not about Cas. That was a private and touchy subject.

“Pretty much. Then he clammed up, said it was none of his business,” Jo said.

“It’s not. And it’s not yours either,” Dean said, trying to step past Jo who stayed in his way.

“Is she from around here or back home?”

Dean glared but figured she wasn’t backing down. He gestured to the table and they sat down.

“He,” Dean said and when Jo didn’t bat an eye at that he moved on, “is from back home.”

“Then what are you doing here?”

“What do you mean?” Dean asked, confused. 

“The person you love is back home. So go home,” she said, like it was easy. 

“It’s complicated. You wouldn’t get it,” Dean said, knowing she hated that phrase as he much as he ever did. Age didn’t always come with wisdom but really he just didn’t want to explain the whole mess.

“I’m not a kid,” she glared. 

“No, but our situation is messed up. And I’m stuck here,” Dean explained. 

“This Cas guy know you’re thick as hell?” Jo asked.

Dean had to laugh.

“I’m pretty sure he does, yeah.” 

Jo shook her head. 

“You’re ridiculous.”

“I know,” Dean said, still smiling. 

“So, you really love him?” Jo asked. 

“Yeah,” Dean said, a little sadly because of how much he ruined things.

“Too bad,” Jo said.

“Why?” Dean asked.

“Because then we can’t be together,” she said with a little teasing smile. 

Dean knew about her crush since it had hardly ever been a secret and rolled his eyes. 

“We weren’t going to be together because you’re thirteen and like a little sister to me,” he responded.

Now Jo rolled her eyes. Dean stood up to take the beers back outside before Bobby started yelling for him. 

“Thank you, Jo,” Dean said, “I needed that.”

She smiled. 

“That’s what sisters are for.”

 

Later that day, Dean ran into Sam when he finally came home.

“There you are. Where’ve you been?” Dean asked.

“Out with Ruby,” Sam answered. “What’s up?”

Dean wanted to comment about that Ruby girl being no good but there were more pressing matters at hand. 

“Did you talk to Jo recently?” 

“She has such a big mouth,” Sam groaned. “Dean, I…”

“It’s fine,” Dean said, ignoring their gossiping for now, “she kind of made me get to thinking.”

“About what?” 

The two of them sat on Bobby’s living room couch. Everyone else was asleep except John who was out who knows where. 

“Look, she helped me remember that I love Cas and asked why I’m here. I think you understand the whole thing better than she does and I want your advice,” Dean said.

“My advice?” Sam asked.

Dean nodded. 

“Then I think I need to know everything,” Sam said.

Dean explained Cas’s last visit and their dad’s freak out and the fight. He also then explained the last phone call he made to Cas and what he said.

“Dean, that sucks. I’m sorry,” Sam said. “Well, I know Dad doesn’t really like the whole thing…”

“Understatement,” Dean interrupted.

“But I think you need to do something. To win Cas back.”

“I don’t know if I can,” Dean shrugged. “I fucked up so bad.”

“You won’t know if you don’t try.”

Dean couldn’t think of any argument to that so he told Sam to continue. 

“You have to go to Lawrence. Find him and talk to him and hopefully he understands. You were trying to protect him.”

“Yeah,” Dean said, “and maybe he’ll believe me.”

“Take the Impala and go to Lawrence. I’ll stay here and stall, say you’re just going into town or something,” Sam suggested. 

“Taking the Impala is kind of a huge ‘fuck you’ to Dad, don’t you think?” Dean asked, worried.

“Exactly. He dragged us here so you take his precious car and go get your boyfriend back.”

“You’re kind of maniacal for a thirteen year old, you know that?” Dean laughed. 

Sam shrugged. 

“What about Jess, don’t you want to see her?” Dean asked. A road trip with his brother sounded like fun, too.

“We left on good terms, I’ve got time. And we’ve been calling a lot actually.”

“Really?” Dean asked. He really did have his head up his ass all summer it seemed.

“Yeah,” Sam said. “So, I’ll stay and stall the adults.”

“Thanks Sammy.”

He gave the kid a hug and felt genuinely bad for anyone without an amazing little brother like Sam.

They went to bed not to long after. It was hard for Dean to fall asleep because he was so excited and nervous for what he was going to do but he eventually grabbed a few hours of sleep.

Before the sun was up, he went outside and found the Impala. He put in his favorite AC/DC cassette, blasted it, and started towards Lawrence.

Maybe Cas would give him a hug and a kiss and forgive him. Maybe he would punch him or tell him to fuck off. Maybe he would be dating someone else. 

Dean had to know.


	21. Crazy Little Thing Called Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It cries (like a baby), in a cradle all night. It swings, it jives, it shakes all over like a jelly fish, I kinda like it. Crazy little thing called love." Crazy Little Thing Called Love, Queen

Dean spent half of the long drive to Lawrence excited and happy which was the first time in months he was either of those things. The thought of seeing Cas again had him smiling but the other half of the drive was spent deciding if he should turn around and go home. But Dean was nothing if not stubborn and went on his way.

He knew what he wanted to happen with Cas, even if he didn’t deserve it, but there was only a slim chance of forgiveness. Sam had been more optimistic but he was a kid and reality sucked. Dean ran through about a million scenarios in his head, some good and some bad, until it was too much and he turned up the music and sang along to clear his mind. 

He was a half hour away when the Impala started to make a rattling noise from somewhere in the engine. Since it didn’t seem like too pressing of an issue, he figured he could patch it up at the shop his dad used to work at in town. The guy knew John and Bobby and had met Dean several times when his dad wanted to teach him some things about cars. Rufus was a good guy who would let Dean fix the Impala up, no doubt. He was a grumpy old guy like Bobby but always had a soft spot for the beautiful Impala and a tolerance for the Winchester boys. 

It was when Dean drove past the “Welcome to Lawrence” sign and the adrenaline finally wore off when he realized he had no idea where the hell Castiel actually lived. At this point, he was so close to his goal and dedicated to his plan that he couldn’t back out now. Maybe Charlie could hack the school’s system and get an address from Cas’s file. He figured Cas was with his uncle and it had to be near the academy since Zach worked there but aside from that, he had nothing. The plan was half-baked at best and it was biting him in the ass but he was already here so he’d have to wing it.

It was a problem to worry about later anyways. The rattling had gotten louder as Dean pulled into Rufus’s garage. 

The only person there was Rufus since they weren’t going to open for another couple of hours. It was a Saturday and really early since Dean drove starting in the middle of the night. He walked in and gave a quick hello before explaining his situation with the car. The old man didn’t mind Dean just taking the Impala in and doing what he needed to do. The radio was set to a classic rock station and Dean got to work.

There was no hurry since his plan had come to a standstill. Dean was humming along to what was on the radio when he heard some footsteps. They were much lighter than Rufus’s would be so he figured it was a customer even though the place was closed. Without taking his head out from under the hood of the car, Dean called out to whoever they were.

“Hey, they’re not open. I don’t actually work here.”

“Hello Dean.”

Dean would have known that voice anywhere, could never forget it. He had heard it angry, scared, happy and in the throes of passion. The last time he had heard it though, months ago, the voice had been heartbroken. He hit his head on the hood of the Impala as he stood up too fast.

“Ow, fuck,” he cursed and turned to face Cas. “What are… I mean, it’s good to…um…”

“I’m at an auto repair place for an obvious reason,” Cas said. 

Dean would have laughed at the attitude if it hadn’t been directed at him.

“I didn’t realize they weren’t open,” Cas continued, “and I certainly didn’t expect to see you here.”

He turned and made to leave.

“Cas, wait,” Dean pleaded.

Cas turned back around with a glare and crossed arms. At least he didn’t leave, Dean thought.

“I wanted to… I’m here to see you, in Lawrence I mean,” Dean said in an attempt to explain.

Cas squinted his eyes like he was confused but didn’t say anything so Dean kept going. 

“The Impala was making weird noises and I know the owner here so I,” Dean rambled and then paused to get to the point. “I drove here to find you, to talk to you.”

“From South Dakota?” Cas asked. Dean didn’t know if he was pissed or impressed.

“Yeah,” Dean shrugged. “I’m here mostly because I was fixing the car but also because I don’t know where you live so I didn’t know where to find you.”

“And you seem to have lost my number,” Cas accused, still glaring. 

“After you kept calling, I kind of punched the phone off the wall?” Dean said, running a hand through his hair. 

“You said you wanted to talk,” Cas said, glazing over the fact that Dean punched a phone, “so talk. I don’t have a lot of time before my brother will want his car back or at least wonder where I am.”

“Okay,” Dean took a deep breath, “Here goes. I know you’re pissed and you have every right to be. I’ve fucked up before but this is probably, no definitely, the worst time. Sam and Jo helped me realize how stupid I was.”

Cas nodded, agreeing that Dean fucked up. 

“I was telling myself that I was protecting you, you know? From my dad and whatever…”

“I’ve told you that I can take care of myself,” Cas interrupted, stepping closer to Dean.

“You’ve proven that, too. I know you can,” Dean agreed. “But if something happened to you because of my dad? I would never forgive myself.”

Cas looked down because he had to know Dean was right, he knew him well enough. 

“Distance seemed like the best bet,” Dean said. “Even if it would suck. My dad won’t ever let us be happy. Relationships are hard enough as it is but that? Him ruining it? How is that fair to you? You deserve to be happy.”

“I WAS HAPPY!” Cas shouted, emphasizing the word “was.”

Dean stood, dumbstruck, at the outburst. Cas looked like he was about to smite someone.

“You don’t think I get the threat of a homophobic family? My cousins and Zach would love a chance to tear you apart but I didn’t see that as a good enough reason to quit,” Cas said, his voice a little quieter but still angry.

Cas sighed and looked at the ground. 

“I can’t believe Gabriel was right,” Cas said softly, almost so Dean missed it. 

“About what?”

“When we were walking in town and he said he was warning me about you? I thought he was crazy and I believed you when you said you wouldn’t hurt me. Guess I was the crazy one.”

Dean had almost forgotten that entire exchange. He couldn’t think of words to say because he couldn’t defend himself now. He had lied to Cas and did hurt him.

“Cas, wait,” Dean said, footsteps snapping him back to reality.

Cas stopped walking but didn’t turn around. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Dean said. 

“I know you didn’t,” Cas replied, “but you did and that just means I can’t trust you not to do it again. Anything else goes wrong and you could be running the opposite direction, away from me.”

Cas got to the door of the garage when Dean tried one last approach.

“I love you, Cas. Please, stay and talk with me. We can fix this,” Dean pleaded. 

“I can tell how broken this is because I still love you, too.”

“Then stay,” Dean pleaded some more, eyes filling with tears that threatened to spill.

Cas shook his head. 

“I can’t.”

“At least let me fix your car, I’m almost done with…”

Cas shook his head again.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I have to go,” Cas said, avoiding Dean’s eyes and backing out of the door. 

Dean watched Cas leave but couldn’t think of anything else to say or maybe he had too much to say. Either way, no words came out and he let Cas go. One tear rolled down his cheek as he stood alone. That was not how he had hoped it would go down. 

He wanted to hit something or throw something out of frustration but only his car was close and he couldn’t do that to his baby. The almost six hour drive was a waste of time and Cas was still pissed. It wasn’t fair to expect him to just take him back but now Dean just felt lost, even worse than the beginning of the summer. 

He wrapped up under the hood and slammed it shut.

The Impala was fixed up and Dean was good to go. He borrowed the phone in Rufus’s office to call Charlie. Since he came all the way to Lawrence and she lived close by, he figured he could see her too. He also was in need of friendly face since this trip wasn’t exactly the homecoming he had hoped for. She had written her number on a scrap of paper at the end of the school year and he was smart enough to bring it with.

“Hello?”

“Charlie?”

“Who’s asking?”

“It’s Dean,” he said, laughing a little at her phone etiquette.

“Oh my god! Hey Dean! What’s up?”

“I, uh, I’m in town and was wondering if you were free?” Dean asked. 

“You’re in Lawrence? Did you see Cas?”

Dean closed his eyes and sighed. 

“Oh,” Charlie said. “Something happened. You better come over.”

Charlie told Dean her address before they hung up. He shouted goodbye to Rufus before he got into the Impala and drove to Charlie’s. 

“Hi Dean,” she greeted at her front door. They shared a hug before she let him in.

“No one home?” he asked as they sat on her couch in the living room. He looked around at the posh place. It was very nice.

“No, my aunt’s at work so you have my undivided attention to talk. Oh, did you want something to drink or anything?” Charlie said.

“Some water,” Dean replied, “thanks.”

He hadn’t had anything all morning and figured he should at least drink something. 

He sipped the water when Charlie came back before telling her the whole story, starting from the last day at the academy when Zach kicked him out all the way up to the present day. He skipped sleeping with Cas and his sullen moping all summer to stick the more relevant points.

“Wow,” Charlie finally said when Dean was done. “That’s…”

“I know,” Dean agreed.

“So, he didn’t even want to talk?”

“Nope,” Dean said sadly. 

“Well, we need a new plan,” she said, clapping her hands together.

“Charlie, I don’t think that’s a good idea. He kind of hates me.”

“Dean, come on. He said he still loves you, this is just a bump in the road.”

“More like a hill. Or mountain,” Dean grumbled. 

Square one was a shitty place to start over. It was like the thing with Anna all over again last winter and trying to apologize. Dean just always had to ruin a good thing it seemed.

“You can’t give up. You two are gross together and I mean that in the best way possible. Seriously, Benny and I could hardly stand being around you two lovebirds with the eyefucking and the…”

“All right, I get it,” Dean said, smiling just a little. He wanted what Charlie described, he wanted that back with Cas, but the guy was still very upset. 

“This is what I’m thinking,” Charlie continued. “Maybe I tell him to come here? And I can let you guys talk?”

“Can’t hurt I guess,” Dean said. “Do you think it will work?”

“I think so.”

Dean sat on the couch quietly while Charlie gave Cas a call. This felt like he was tricking Cas but he was out of options. He wanted one more chance to talk to Cas and if Cas didn’t want anything to do with him afterwards then Dean would understand.

Charlie made it seem like just a casual meet up since they hadn’t seen each other in a long time. Cas argued that Gabriel’s car was acting up but finally agreed that he would stop by once Charlie insisted.

“Thanks Charlie, it means a lot,” Dean said. “You’re awesome.”

“I know,” she grinned. 

The two of them relaxed watching some TV. Dean asked Charlie about her summer and the girlfriend she was still hiding from her family. 

Charlie was animatedly talking about Gilda when the doorbell rang.

“Shit,” Dean said, “here goes nothing.”

Charlie got up and walked to the front door. Dean could hear their muffled conversation until their footsteps let him know they were coming back. He twisted his hands together in his lap and swallowed hard. 

“So Charlie, how…”

Cas froze in the doorway of the living room when he saw Dean. He turned on Charlie with a glare.

“What is he doing here?” Cas snapped. “Did you get dragged into this?”

“Look, I know you guys have some stuff to work out and I’m sorry I kind of lied to get you here but you’re both my friends and you need to fix this!” Charlie said in one breath. 

She backed away from the living room. Cas slowly turned to face Dean, still glaring.

“I can’t believe you brought Charlie into this, Dean,” Cas said, seething.

“I asked for her help because she’s friends with both of us.”

Cas scoffed.

“Can you just hear what I have to say? Please?” Dean begged.

Cas remained motionless so Dean went on. 

“I was stupid to think that moving to South Dakota would mean the end of us and I’m sorry. You mean too much to me. Hell, you mean everything to me.”

Dean paused to gauge Cas’s reaction. Maybe Dean was optimistic but it seemed like Cas softened up a little.

“You’re the first serious relationship I’ve had and you’re better at it than I am. It’s easier for you to lay it on the table with your feelings and everything but I do love you and I’m so sorry I hurt you. I hate myself for that. Maybe we have to build our trust back up but I will work every day to earn that back. I’m not saying I won’t fuck up again because knowing me I probably will since I am a fuck up but...”

Cas almost interrupted, maybe to contradict that last point, but Dean pushed on.

“What I’m saying is I’m not running away again. Not from you, ever.”

Dean hesitantly watched Cas’s face. 

“Say something man, I practically just bared my soul,” Dean said with a small nervous laugh.

There was a range of emotions on Cas’s face and as they always say, actions speak louder than words. In this case, the action was a kiss.

Cas lurched forward and grabbed Dean’s face to kiss him hard on the mouth. Dean gripped Cas’s shoulders, never wanting to let go. 

“Don’t leave me again you son of a bitch,” Cas said, breathlessly, when he broke the kiss.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Dean smirked against Cas’s mouth before kissing him again.

They kept kissing and clinging to each other until a high-pitched squeal caused them to stop. 

“Oh thank God,” Charlie said, her smile matching her friends’.

“I think we figured our shit out,” Dean said, eyes not leaving Cas’s. 

“We did,” Cas agreed. He quickly kissed Dean again. “That was quite the apology.”

“Now, we can go on dates again. Let’s get coffee,” Dean said, half-joking but kind of serious.

“Sure. There’s one by your auto shop.”

“Across the street. I know it,” Dean said.

“Let’s go,” Cas said.

He grabbed Dean’s hand and started to pull him towards the front door. They both gave Charlie a quick hug and called their thanks as they left. She shouted “smell you later, bitches” as they shut the door.

In front of Charlie’s house, they got into their cars and planned to meet up at the coffee place. 

It wasn’t far and Dean smiled the whole way. This was worth the drive and finally he had his boyfriend back. The worst summer he ever had was behind him and now he could think about a future with Cas. He surprised himself by thinking that but it was what he truly wanted. Some work would be done, mostly by Dean, to get their relationship back to where it was. 

They parked next to each other at the coffee place across the street from the auto shop. Rufus was standing out front of it and waved to them.

Inside, they ordered and got their coffee before sitting down. 

“Didn’t you see my car at Charlie’s?” Dean wondered out loud as the thought hit him.

“I was honestly still pretty distracted from our fight,” Cas said with a small shrug. “I was hoping Charlie would help with everything.”

“And she did.”

Dean smiled and took Cas’s hand over the table. 

“So what do we do now?” Dean asked. 

“I’m just glad we worked this out,” Cas responded. “I don’t know.”

“What if I became an emancipated teen, got a job around here? I could see you on weekends while you’re at school,” Dean suggested. 

“I’d love to have you close but that’d be selfish. What about Sam?” Cas asked. 

“I…” 

Dean didn’t finish that thought because he was suddenly looking at his brother. He was in the backseat of a beat up old pickup truck outside the coffee shop. In the front seat were Bobby and John. 

“Shit,” Dean cursed. 

Cas turned around and repeated the curse. Dean made eye contact with Sam who looked guilty and mouthed “sorry.” The kid must have said where he went but Dean didn’t blame him. His dad probably could have figured it out eventually, the man wasn’t that stupid.

John walked in to coffee shop.

“Dad, I can explain,” Dean tried. He immediately stood and made sure his dad didn’t get close to Cas.

“Dean, we need to talk,” his dad said, his expression unreadable. “Alone.”


	22. Shut Up and Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Deep in her eyes, I think I see the future. I realize this is my last chance. She took my arm, I don't know how it happened. We took the floor and she said, oh don't you dare look back. Just keep your eyes on me." Shut Up and Dance, Walk the Moon

“Dad, please,” Dean said as his father grabbed his arm roughly and pulled him out of the coffee shop. Cas was following them, a panicked look on his face. 

They stopped in front of the coffee shop. Cas was standing by them and Dean wasn’t sure how mad his dad was or what he would do. 

“Cas, do me a favor and say hi to Sam and Bobby for me,” Dean suggested so he could get him out of harm’s way. This conversation was between him and his dad.

Cas opened his mouth to presumably protest but Dean gave him a pointed look. Cas set his mouth in a hard line and walked over to the truck where Sam and Bobby sat.

“Sam told you where I was?” Dean asked once Cas was out of earshot.

“Took some persuading but yes, he said you were in Lawrence,” John said.

Dean glanced at the truck and didn’t see Sam hurt anywhere. Maybe John just threatened to ground him or take away his salads. That would crack the little health nut but Dean wasn’t mad at him. Sam wouldn’t have held out forever against John and Dean didn’t blame him at all. John could have just guessed where Dean would go, there weren’t many places he might pick. 

“My first idea was going to be to ask Rufus if he had seen you but all I had to do was look across the street and there was my car,” John said, crossing his arms across his chest. 

“So now what? You drag me back to South Dakota?” Dean guessed. He really didn’t want to make a scene out in front of a shop where anyone could see but he wasn’t about to leave Cas. 

Even if his dad did drag him back there, he wasn’t done with Cas. Not this time. He would keep fighting to get back to his boyfriend no matter what John said or did. 

“No.”

“I…What?” Dean said. There was no way his dad just said that. He was expecting another fight.

“You don’t have to come back to South Dakota. Sam was telling me about his girlfriend here and she sounds a lot better than the other girl he was talking to in Sioux Falls,” John explained. 

Dean couldn’t argue there, Jess beat Ruby in every way possible. It was a little shocking to Dean that his Dad noticed though considering how little attention he paid to either of his sons. Dean would have thought that as long as it was a girl Sam was interested in that John wouldn’t care.

“He also did some more explaining about your whole bisexual thing and I might have been wrong about some stuff,” John admitted, looking at the ground.

“So, you’re saying we can come back to Lawrence?” Dean asked hesitantly, still finding it hard to believe the words that were coming out of his dad’s mouth. It was too good to be true. 

“Son, when I was dating your mother I pulled the same boneheaded stunt you just did. My mom told me to forget about Mary because her parents didn’t like me and I didn’t listen. I took the car and snuck Mary out of her house,” John continued. 

“What happened?” Dean asked. 

He hadn’t heard his father speak about Mary since as long as he could remember. If Sam or Dean ever asked about her, he shut them down.

“We both got grounded for a long time but it didn’t matter. I was willing to risk everything because I loved her so much.”

John looked over at Cas standing by the car. Cas was talking to Sam and getting him to laugh. He seemed to be getting along with Bobby, too. 

“You really love him?” John asked with a sigh. 

“Yeah,” Dean said, “I do.”

John nodded. 

“Then I owe you an apology. Or a lot of them actually. I haven’t exactly been the greatest father to you boys, Bobby was kind enough to point that out on our drive.”

Dean made a mental note to thank Bobby for that. And Sam for talking to John. It must have been quite the car ride. 

“I want to make it up to you,” John said.

“By letting us come home?” Dean asked boldly. 

John nodded again.

“I think that’s what best for you boys.”

Dean smiled. This was turning out to be one of the best days he’d ever had. Cas took him back, they would come back to Lawrence and it seemed like John was finally getting his head out of his ass.

“Thanks Dad.”

The two of them walked over to the truck. 

“Sammy, we’re coming home!”

“Really?” Sam beamed. 

“Yeah,” Dean said, sliding an arm around Cas’s shoulders who smiled and leaned into his boyfriend. “Really.”

 

The move back to Lawrence took a day to drive back to Sioux Falls and get all of the stuff they brought there. The market was slow so their house never sold and they could move back in right away. Sam and Dean gave big hugs to Ellen and Jo and even a reluctant Bobby who told them to stay in touch. John thanked them for everything and they returned to Kansas. 

Once they got back to Lawrence, Dean talked to Rufus about getting a job. John was already offered his job back there and Dean really didn’t want to go back to school. If he couldn’t go back to the military academy with Cas and their friends, then he wasn’t interested. The public school close to him he went to before was full of people he didn’t care for and he was absolutely against returning there. 

John was on board with Dean getting the job but the deal was he had to get his GED so Dean agreed. It seemed like John was pretty willing to do what Dean said, within reason, as a way to make up for years of shitty parenting so Dean was able to get a cell phone too. The first number he put in was Castiel’s. Sam, Dean and John even ate meals together like a family and it seemed like things were actually getting better. 

The school year started and Dean and Cas quickly got into a routine. Every Saturday, they would spend the full day together in town and Dean could see Charlie, Benny and Garth too. Then Dean would sneak onto the military academy’s campus to spend the night with Cas. It was easy enough to hide him and so far no one knew except Cas, Benny, Charlie and Garth.

After three months apart and only seeing each other only once a week, they had a lot of time to make up for. The two of them found out Cas was very good at being on top. Dean was more than willing to let Cas take the reins most nights. 

Surprisingly, John let Dean take the Impala to visit Cas. Things were improving between them and it wasn’t a chore just to be around him anymore. Sure, Dean might have pushed a little to get what he wanted but he figured his dad owed him. 

Dean would leave on Sunday once Cas started to insist he couldn’t stay in bed all day cuddling and doing other stuff and had homework to do. Dean would call him a nerd every time and Cas would lovingly roll his eyes. 

After they had been doing that for a couple months, Cas explained how annoying it was having Lucifer being the one in command over him. He said it was even worse than Raphael. Michael was still the other company leader and he didn’t get along with Lucifer at all. Apparently, Raphael was the peacekeeper between them and now that he had graduated, they were constantly at each other’s throats. It fell on Castiel to attempt to keep them apart but it was a difficult job. Crowley was also bitter about Lucifer taking company leader because he had hoped to take the position. Cas had to deal with that, too.

“Of course Crowley wasn’t going to get it over Lucifer when Zachariah is in charge,” Cas said. 

The two of them were in the little diner with Dean’s favorite burgers close to the campus. 

“Well, Crowley’s an idiot,” Dean said.

“He is,” Cas agreed. “I wish you were with me. I miss you during the week.”

“I miss you, too,” Dean grinned. 

“But enough about me and school,” Cas said. “How’s work? How’s Sam?”

“You know I don’t mind hearing about what’s going on with you. Work isn’t bad. A little weird spending so much time with my dad but I’m learning a lot. There was a lot I didn’t know about cars I guess. Sam is good and he spends a lot of time with Jess,” Dean explained. 

“That’s good. How about your GED classes?” Cas asked.

“Not hard enough. Henriksen was a dick but he already taught me everything,” Dean joked. 

“I knew you were smart,” Cas smiled. 

“You might be right,” Dean winked. “I am dating you after all.”

Cas squeezed Dean’s hand over the table. They finished eating, paid and snuck back to Cas’s room. 

“You know, this sneaking around is kinda hot,” Dean said, smiling against Cas’s mouth before pulling him close and kissing him. They were alone in Cas’s room. 

“It is, isn’t it? My family would freak out if they knew,” Cas said. “And then kick me out.”

“Maybe they need a new school.”

“Good luck with that,” Cas smirked. “They run this place, remember?”

“Yeah, but…”

“Do you want to keep talking about my family or can I fuck you?” Cas said with a straight face.

“I, uh…” Dean stammered. “The second. Second one.”

Cas guided him back to his bed and kept his word.

 

Dean was sitting with Sam while they ate dinner. John was at work while it was Dean’s night off. It was still worrying to Dean how Cas had to still deal with his family. 

“You’re not eating,” Sam pointed out.

“No, I’m worried about Cas,” Dean answered honestly.

“What’s up?” Sam asked.

“His family just gives him trouble is all.”

Sam nodded his understanding.

Dean kept thinking about what he could do to help Cas while Sam did his homework. He knew Zachariah was a huge problem and the way he ran the academy was all kinds of wrong. Lucifer and Michael, no doubt, still had terrible grades. There had to be a way to get rid of them, or at least Zachariah. 

If there was a plan to be made, he knew he needed to talk to Charlie, Benny and Garth. 

On a Saturday in late October, Dean met with the three of them before he was going to be meeting Cas. They met in Dean and Benny’s old room. Benny hadn’t gotten a new roommate which gave them the space they needed to scheme.

“I know I don’t even go here anymore but I want to help,” Dean said after he explained his idea. 

“You want to help Cas,” Charlie teased with a little smile.

“Well, all of you technically but mostly Cas yeah,” Dean said with his own smile. 

“What do you have in mind, brother?” Benny said.

“You know we’ll help,” Garth chimed in. 

“Thanks guys, it means a lot,” Dean said. “I have an idea.”

His friends had their eyes on him so he continued.

“I know Cas’s dad is overseas but he was in charge here before Zachariah took over. I’m guessing Zach bullied the board into making that switch. I think if we get him back, maybe he can take his job back if he wants. I mean, if I can explain what’s going on over here.”

“That’s not a bad plan,” Benny said, impressed. 

“What can we do to help?” Garth asked.

“I need Charlie to find me a way to contact him and then you guys have to keep this from Cas. I don’t know if this will work and I don’t want to get him excited for nothing. If it does work, it will be a great surprise. Sound good?”

They all agreed. Their group stepped out from the room and walked to Cas’s door to get him to go into town. He walked out and looked at Dean, confused.

“Hey Cas,” Dean greeted and leaned in to kiss him.

“What are you doing here already?” Cas asked.

“I, uh, well I’m here…”

“To surprise you!” Charlie exclaimed.

“Right! To surprise you,” Dean nodded. 

Cas gave a look that only lasted a second before he smiled and suggested they get moving with their day. Everyone agreed. They spent the day in town enjoying the last few mild days before it got really cold. 

Later that night, Dean and Cas spent the night together. Instead of sex, they just cuddled and talked since they didn’t get much of a chance to with their friends around. 

In the morning, Dean woke Cas up with a blowjob before he drove home. 

 

It took two weeks for Charlie to track down Cas’s dad. Everything she found, she sent to him through e-mail because there was a lot of stuff. It looked like his dad’s name was Chuck Shurley. Charlie found a mother listed and her last name was Novak but didn’t find any evidence that the two of them had been married. 

Chuck was stationed somewhere in the Middle East and it took Charlie another week to find an address for him.

By now, it was already Thanksgiving break. Dean was able to see Cas on a few of the days he had off from school. It was a little tense with John who was still struggling to accept that his son was in love with another guy but it went well overall. Dean knew John was trying to accept Dean for who he was but it was a big change and one he wasn’t used to so Dean was patient with him. Sam was glad to see Cas again and didn’t mind taking the couch for a night to let Dean and Cas spend some alone time together. If John noticed that they shared the room, he kept quiet. 

Bobby, Ellen and Jo came for Thanksgiving and it was a great time. Ellen and Jo got to meet Cas who blew off his family to join Dean’s. When Dean protested because he didn’t want there to be more problems between Cas and his family, Cas argued he could handle it later. Good food, a lack of arguments and time spent with family was always an amazing holiday and Dean loved having Cas there. 

When school started for Cas again and Dean was working, his phone dinged that he had an e-mail. Charlie had finally found a way to contact Chuck and sent Dean the details.

Dean ran into Rufus’s office and asked if he could leave early. He said his head hurt and most of his work was finished anyways so Rufus let him go. 

He drove home and got the beat up old laptop he shared with Sam. At the dining room table, he constructed a carefully worded message and printed it to be mailed. It was a little difficult since Dean didn’t know the man but he tried to get his point across as best as he could. If this all went according to plan, Cas would have a much more pleasant next semester. 

 

When December started, Cas started to freak out about finals again. 

“Seriously, you know you’ll do fine. Why are you so worried?” Dean asked. He was lying in just his boxers on Cas’s bed while Cas tried to study.

“I need to do well on these. I want to go to college, remember?” Cas replied. 

“Yeah but you also said you couldn’t go because of your family,” Dean said.

“Screw them,” Cas said, his eyes not leaving the page.

“Whoa, hold on,” Dean said, sitting up. “Look at me.”

Cas looked behind over his shoulder at Dean.

“You’re serious?”

“Yes, Dean. I want to go to college.”

“That’s great,” Dean said, already dreading the inevitable. Cas was going to leave him behind.

Cas saw Dean’s face fall and walked over to the bed to sit next to Dean.

“You don’t seem to think it’s great,” Cas observed. “What’s wrong?”

“College is a big deal. If you were too good for me before…”

“Dean, what do you think will happen? I’ll leave you?”

Dean didn’t answer.

“Come on, I’ve already told you I’m in this for the long run.”

“You’re not going to ditch me for someone better?” Dean asked, looking sideways at Cas.

“Even if I could find someone that was, which I doubt, I wouldn’t want to leave you. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Dean said, kissing Cas. “Now go study, you nerd. You have to go to college.”

“There are places that are very willing to accept people with GED’s you know,” Cas said as he walked back over to his desk. “Like University of Kansas.”

“I think we’ll leave being smart up to you, sweetheart,” Dean answered.

Cas turned around to keep studying. Dean almost said how it was nice of Cas to think of him and to look for somewhere for them to maybe go together and how the two of them planning a future like that made him stupidly excited but he didn’t. College just never really seemed like an option for Dean. His grades except for his year here sucked and what would he even major in? Plus money…

The whole thing just never felt like a viable option. Although if Cas went to KU, he wouldn’t be far. Dean could still visit him. Now Dean was getting a little panicked and needed some space to think.

“I’m gonna head out,” Dean said, getting dressed. “Let you study.”

“You sure?” Cas asked.

“Yeah,” Dean responded and kissed Cas quickly. “I’ll see you soon. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

 

A week before Cas’s finals were going to be done, Dean heard back from Chuck Shurley. It was waiting for him when he came home from visiting Cas and he opened it right away. The letter was probably there since the day before while he was with Cas. 

It was everything he could have hoped for and the plan would work perfectly. 

To start, Dean texted Cas and informed him that he and Charlie had been doing some digging. There was no rule in the Lawrence Military Academy rulebook that said anything about forbidding a student bringing a non-student of the same sex to the winter formal dance . 

Cas: **Are you asking yourself to the dance?**

Dean: **Only because you didn’t ask me**

Cas: **You can come on one condition**

Dean: **What? I wear a tux?**

Cas: **You don’t kiss any of my cousins**

Dean: **Haha very funny**

It looked like Dean was dating a comedian. On the plus side, if Cas could joke about it then it was truly behind them.

Cas: **See you Friday ;)**

Dean had to smile, like he did every time Cas used an emoticon. The guy could be so serious but would send winky faces when he texted and it made Dean laugh every time.

 

It was Friday and Dean drove over to the campus after Sam stopped fussing about getting his tie right. He was wearing dress pants with a white shirt and green tie along with a sport coat. He knew he would stick out without the formal uniform like everyone else but he didn’t care about everyone else. Just Cas. 

He waited in the lobby of the dorm building until Benny and Cas came down. Damn did that formal blue uniform look good on Cas and he said so.

“You look good too, Dean,” Cas said, his cheeks flushing pink a little.

Dean and Cas shared a brief kiss, ignored Benny’s friendly mocking about his poor eyes, and were joined by Garth and Charlie before walking over to the gym. 

It was just as over the top ridiculous but somehow beautiful just like last year. 

“I think I have a lot to make up for from the last dance,” Dean said into Cas’s ear. His hand was on his lower back and he could feel the shiver go down his spine. “Dance with me?”

“You’re sure? In front of everyone?” Cas asked, looking around.

“Who? I only see you,” Dean smirked. 

“That’s cheesy even for you,” Cas said.

“Just dance with me,” Dean replied.

He pulled Cas close, a hand on the middle of his back and the other holding Cas’s hand. The songs were probably too slow for that style of dancing but Dean didn’t care. He didn’t mind the stares either. This was perfect, just holding Cas close and feeling his warmth and being able to kiss him.

They shared their kiss for about another minute until they were pulled apart. Dean saw Zachariah looming over them.

“What the hell are you doing here, boy?” he yelled over the music. 

“I can be here. I checked your little rule book,” Dean shouted. 

“Not with my nephew. Not after all the shit you pulled and after I kicked you out!”

Zachariah grabbed Dean’s arm and started to yank him towards the door. 

“Stop right there Zachariah.”

It was a voice over the DJ’s microphone and the music stopped. The crowd of students didn’t really know what was going and seemed upset that the dance came to a halt. 

Zachariah did stop but didn’t loosen his grip on Dean. He squinted to try and see who dare disrupt him. 

“Dad?” Cas asked once he figured it out.

“Let go of me,” Dean smirked. 

Zachariah was too stunned to keep his grip when he realized it was Chuck so Dean pulled his arm free.

“Zachariah, this boy,” Chuck said, pointing at Dean, “has told me everything.”

Chuck put the microphone back and started to walk towards Zachariah, Dean and Cas. Zachariah was glaring at Dean who was too busy looking at Cas to notice.

“You talked to my dad?” Cas asked, giving Dean a confused look.

“Yeah, to help you. To get rid of Zach and so he could come home,” Dean explained. 

“This school is not to be run by a bully who gives his sons special treatment and threatens the board. Plus, the apparent homophobic actions against my son,” Chuck stated once he was in Zachariah’s face.

Cas shot a worried glance to Dean and Dean knew he shouldn’t have outted Cas to his dad but it just kind of happened. Luckily, Chuck seemed cool with it. 

“Come here, Castiel,” Chuck said.

Chuck pulled Cas into a hug. It was brief only because Chuck wasn’t done with Zachariah yet.

“You can’t just come here and…” Zach tried but Chuck spoke over him.

“I’ve talked to the board and they are more than willing to reinstate me after I pointed out the shady things you’ve pulled. They also have some interesting files on some missing scholarship money so the police might be interested in you too,” Chuck said, a smug grin on his face.

Zachariah couldn’t find anything to say and was escorted out of the gym by the school’s security guards. Dean waved at him before giving him the middle finger. The music started up again amidst some students’ cheering. They must not have like ol’ Zach either. Not surprisingly, Lucifer and Michael were nowhere to be seen. The two of them probably didn’t want to show their faces.

“So, you’re my son’s boyfriend,” Chuck said sternly, looking at Dean.

“Yes sir,” Dean answered. 

“Nice to meet you,” Chuck said, breaking into a grin before shaking Dean’s hand. “You kids have fun. Castiel, we’ll catch up later.”

He walked away so Dean turned to Cas.

“How did you… I mean, I didn’t even know how to find my dad,” Cas said, a little overwhelmed at the night’s events.

“I had Charlie’s help,” Dean said. “I know we went a little behind your back but it was to surprise you. Are you mad?”

“Mad?” Cas asked. “This is amazing! Dad’s back, Zach’s gone. This is the best thing ever. I love you so much, Dean.”

“Love you too,” Dean laughed. It was a relief that Cas was so happy.

“What does this mean now? Can my dad work here now? And Michael and Lucifer…what about…” Cas worried.

Dean smiled. Leave it to Cas to start worrying and not enjoy the good news.

“Quit worrying,” he said. “Everything will be fine.”

“You sure?” Cas asked. 

“Positive. Now, shut up and dance with me.”

Cas leaned in and kissed Dean. The next song was an actual slow song so they kept dancing like they were before, holding each other close.


	23. Carry On Wayward Son

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done. Lay your weary head to rest, don't you cry no more." Carry on Wayward Son, Kansas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading, leaving comments and kudos. It means a lot and I hope you enjoyed it! If you want to say hi, my tumblr is jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com.

Since their relationship was no longer a secret to anyone, Dean and Cas could finally spend time with each other without worrying one bit about someone catching them and anything bad happening. They were still careful that nobody walked in on them while they were having some alone time to prevent awkwardness but it was nice to have their family be in the know.

Over winter break, the two of them spent a lot of time together since Cas wasn’t hidden away at school even though Dean still worked at the garage but they made do. 

Cas’s dad got a new apartment in Lawrence that was pretty big so Castiel and Gabriel each had their own room there as opposed to sharing like they had to at Zachariah’s. According to Cas, sharing with Gabe had been a nightmare. Dean laughed at the stories of Gabriel’s pranks despite Cas saying they weren’t funny.

For Christmas, they split their time between each of their families. John was hesitant but he claimed it was only because they had been dating for less than a year and were so young but Dean reminded him how young he himself had been when he was dating Mary. John really had been working on becoming more accepting of their relationship and starting getting along better with Cas. 

Cas got along very well with Ellen and Jo when they all got together at the Winchester’s for Christmas. Bobby was grumpy as always but clearly happy for them. Dean was happy that hanging out with Cas’s family only meant Gabriel and Chuck and a surprise appearance from Anna. Zachariah was under investigation for stealing scholarship money and Dean didn’t know or care where Raphael, Michael and Lucifer were. He would be okay with never seeing them again.

Dean was sure to celebrate Cas’s birthday when they were alone as well. It was his pleasure to help break in the new bed in his new room. It was a full bed instead of a twin and gave them plenty of room to fool around and Dean brought Cas close to the edge over and over before finally letting him come. They held each other as close as they always did when they fell asleep together.

On New Year’s Eve, they hung out at Charlie’s whose aunt had gone out of town. They were able to meet her girlfriend Gilda and she turned out to be pretty cool. Gabriel got pretty drunk and Kali wasn’t amused but nothing really amused her anyways. Dean didn’t understand how the two of them worked but didn’t question it. 

The highlight was definitely kissing Cas at midnight, Dean figured. He wanted to start every year from that point on with his lips on Cas’s. Dean wanted Cas to be in his future and couldn’t picture one without him. 

One thing constantly pestering Dean into the new year was the idea of college. Cas hadn’t brought it up and Dean didn’t really want to talk about it. The whole thing seemed a little ridiculous to Dean and he tried to forget about it. John never asked Dean what he wanted to do after he finished getting his GED so Dean figured he would just keep working at Rufus’s. 

That was the kind of dead end job, like his dad, Dean figured he would be doing for the rest of his life. Hell, that’s what he thought when he was failing and fighting through his first two years of high school. Sure he liked fixing cars but he wasn’t sure that was all he wanted to do and it just always seemed like there was nowhere else to go. Meeting Cas didn’t change that, it only meant Cas deserved to go to college and get whatever job he wanted. 

Dean was holding him back. 

There were countless times when Dean wanted to bring it up but didn’t know how. It was hard to ask what Cas was going to be doing when he knew he wouldn’t be going with. Dean wasn’t about to break up with Cas but it was hard to picture how the college thing would fit into their future. 

It was the day before Dean’s birthday in January and he was visiting Cas. His actual birthday was a Sunday and he would be spending it with Sam and his dad but for now, he could be with his boyfriend.

Cas had surprised Dean by stealing him an entire pie from the school’s kitchen which brought back some fun memories.

“Cas, you’re the best,” Dean grinned.

They were sitting on Cas’s bed eating the pie between them. 

“So you only have a few months left here,” Dean pointed out. 

Cas nodded, his mouth full of pie. 

Dean was about to ask, “then what?” but didn’t. He wasn’t sure he wanted to know the answer.

They ate a few minutes in silence, Dean looking down and avoiding Cas’s eyes.

“Dean, were you going to say something?”

Dean let out a little laugh, still surprised at how well Cas knew him. He looked up.

“What are you doing after this place?” Dean asked, figuring he couldn’t prolong this anymore.

“I’m going to college,” Cas said, “and I think you should, too.”

Dean chewed some more pie, trying to be pleased for Cas while not being disappointed that the distance would suck.

“Did you already apply and stuff?” Dean asked, pushing some pie around the tin.

“And got in.”

“What?” Dean said, not sure he heard it right. 

“I got in, Dean. To the University of Kansas.”

“Really?” Dean smiled. 

“Yes. And I want you to come with me.”

“I mean, I can visit you…”

“No, you can go too. To college.”

Dean was quiet. He appreciated the support but how would be able to get in or afford it? The whole idea was still crazy. They would just have to visit each or maybe move in by the campus. It would take Dean a lot of courage and building up to it but he could ask, eventually, if they could live together. 

Cas hopped off the bed and came back with a packet of papers. 

“What is this?” Dean asked. 

“An application. For you.”

Dean took it from Cas and looked it over. They asked a lot of questions and wanted to know his grades all through high school and his score on the ACT test that had actually went pretty well. 

“They have EMT night classes and then you can be a firefighter.”

Dean kept flipping through the pages and didn’t answer. He could keep working at the garage while taking the classes. He told Cas once how he wanted to be a firefighter since his mom died in a fire when he was little. Of course Cas remembered, he wanted to know everything about Dean and Dean was the same way.

“I’ll, uh, have to talk to my dad,” Dean said. “But it doesn’t hurt to fill this out.”

Cas smiled.

“Now, how about I thank you for caring so much about my future?” Dean smirked, setting the pie dish and forks on the desk behind him.

“Shouldn’t I be fucking you? It is your birthday after all,” Cas suggested.

“I’ll have more birthdays,” Dean answered. “This is special.”

He leaned forward and kissed Cas, gently guiding him onto his back. They got their clothes off in a few minutes and were both hard after a couple more minutes. Dean teased Cas a while with his mouth on Cas’s cock and playing with his nipples before sucking a hickey on his neck. Dean knew where the lube was after doing this so many times and prepped Cas’s hole as quickly as he could before sliding in.

“Dean, come on, fuck me,” Cas moaned breathlessly under Dean. 

Dean did just that, thrusting into Cas hard and fast and bringing them quickly to the edge and spilling over. There were times to go slow but Dean couldn’t hold back. Cas was planning a future that included his boyfriend and it was how Dean showed his appreciation.

“Shit, Cas,” Dean said, a goofy smile on his face after he pulled out and collapsed next to Cas.

“Happy birthday, Dean,” Cas said with a matching grin. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

 

Dean finished filling out his application with a little bit of help from Henriksen who actually gave him a really good recommendation. It didn’t hurt that he got a one hundred percent on his final and an A in the class both semesters plus Henriksen liked him, more so now that he wasn’t a student there anymore.

He told Sam right away about his plan and the kid was all for it. Sam was actually already looking at colleges himself even though he was still just in eighth grade and so was Jess. Dean figured they would end up at the same place if they lasted through high school.

One day when Dean came from work, John was already sitting at the kitchen table since it was his day off. In his hand was a letter and Dean could see the KU logo. He swallowed hard and braced himself. Surely, the new and improved John couldn’t last long and Dean was ready for a fight.

“Dad…”

“What is this, Dean?”

“I applied there. Maybe I got in,” Dean said, standing tall.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Dean didn’t have a good answer. John wordlessly handed the letter over. 

Slowly, Dean opened the envelope. He took the letter out and unfolded it and immediately saw the word congratulations. 

“Holy fuck, I got in,” Dean said, smiling.

“What are you planning on doing at this college of yours, son?” John asked.

“I want to be a fireman. They’re night classes, I’ll work at the garage to pay my way and maybe take out a few loans.”

“I’m your father, I can help with that.”

“Thanks, Dad.”

“I figure it’s about time I step up. I’m proud of you, Dean, and your mother would be too.”

Dean nodded, accepting the praise. It felt good to hear and he didn’t think his dad had ever said that to him before. He had doubts if his mom would be proud that he didn’t finish high school but he was getting a GED and would go to college. As a fireman, he would make sure nothing happened to any other family like what happened to his. That was how Dean could make his mom proud.

 

Dean finished getting his GED in April and was all set to join Cas at the University of Kansas in the fall. Cas’s last semester had been easy and stress free since Zachariah was gone and his cousins had no power any more. Even Crowley had backed off.

During the first weekend of June, Cas was ready to graduate. Dean brought Sam along and they sat by Gabriel in the stands who had already graduated the year before and was travelling with Kali with their newfound freedom. Benny, Charlie and Garth were all in the stadium with Castiel. The three of them were all going to separate schools but promised to keep in touch and get together at winter break.

Chuck, as the man in charge, gave a speech. He paused numerous times to drink water and struggled through it and Sam nudged Dean in the ribs when he laughed. 

As they called everyone’s name, Dean got ready to cheer extra loud for his boyfriend. They finally got to the middle of the alphabet and said “Castiel Novak.” Dean jumped out of his seat and cheered like crazy, yelling Cas’s name and hollering which made a majority of people turn and look at him. 

From the stage, Dean could see Cas duck his head but was still smiling so it was worth the funny looks.

After the ceremony, Dean wrapped Cas in a hug and lifted him up off the ground despite his protests. Once he set him back down, he dipped him into a kiss.

Sam took a picture on his phone. 

“I’m proud of you, babe,” Dean said into Cas’s ear, making him blush like crazy.

“Thanks,” Cas smiled, kissing Dean again.

 

In the fall, Dean and Cas moved into an apartment together. They were still close to their families and the school and Dean could still get to work easily since John gave him the Impala as a GED graduation gift. 

They framed the picture Sam took and put it above the couch in their living room.

School was tough and it took most of their time to study. More than once, the two of them argued about something stupid because they were overly tired but an apology and a dinner date followed by sex would more than make up for it. 

The start of their sophomore year, Dean got drunk and argued that Cas should find someone better than him. Cas didn’t talk to him for a week after explaining that Dean needed to get it through his thick skull that he wasn’t going anywhere. Dean didn’t drink for a while after that. 

“We’ve been through much together, you and I. If you think I’m stupid enough to give up on us, you’re wrong Dean. I love you and that will never change,” Cas had argued.

Dean cooked and cleaned and pampered Cas for a while after that argument to make it up to him.

It did take Dean longer than anticipated to graduate so instead of three years, he took four. Between working and not taking the full class load the whole time, it was hard to avoid. Cas knew it would take him four years for his English degree when he was going in so then they could graduate together.

At their graduation from the University, the two of them were all dressed in their blue gowns ready to graduate. Before they left, the two of them stood in their apartment.

“I look stupid in this thing,” Dean grumbled, fussing with the cap.

“You look fine,” Cas argued, straightening the cap out. 

After graduation, the two of them were going to move into a house in Lawrence. Nothing special, just one floor and two bedrooms, but it would be theirs. Dean would keep working at Rufus’s and also got a job with the Lawrence Fire Department. It just so happened that Cas’s dad knew a guy there and was able to give him an extra nudge. Cas would write and see where it took him. They agreed that Dean could work while Cas would write. When Cas protested that he should work too so that he could help support them, Dean shut him down.

“I get to do what I love so you can, too. Once you start getting published and everything, it will be worth it. I can take care of us for now,” Dean had said. 

Dean took a look around the apartment before they went to the huge stadium for graduation. Looking at their picture from high school still above the couch, he had an idea.

After the ceremony, it took a while to find their families in the massive crowd of people. When they did, Dean had Sam take a picture of him dipping and kissing Cas again. Dean didn’t even care that he kissed Cas in front of his father, he was too happy. Chuck and Gabriel shook Dean’s hand in congratulations before hugging Cas. Chuck and John seemed to get along well enough and suggested they all go out to dinner. 

When they moved in to their house, the picture from graduation was the first thing they put up, right next to the first picture from Cas’s graduation from LMA. 

“It looks perfect,” Cas said.

Dean was standing behind him, arms wrapped around his waist, and he nodded.

The second thing they moved in was a couch to go under the pictures which Cas bent Dean over and fucked him before even touching any other boxes. 

Sam and Jess went to Stanford together in the fall and both loved the place immediately. Benny met a girl named Andrea at his school and Charlie was now with a girl named Dorothy. Garth was done with school a year early and settled down in Wisconsin with a girl named Bess. Dean thought to himself that he would very much like to meet the girl dating Garth. She had to be something else. 

~

After living in the house for a little over a year and both of them working hard, Dean considered the fact that he had met Cas seven years ago once it was September. That had been a long time and there had been a lot of ups and downs but Dean was ready for the next step. It wasn’t hard too decide what to do. They had been dating for so long and had been living together for five years already anyways and Dean had no doubts. This had been on his mind for a long, long time. 

With Chuck’s blessing and help, Dean planned to propose to Cas at the same spot where they first met at the military school. It was a relatively warm September day and Dean asked Cas if he wanted to go for a drive.

“Of course,” Cas answered.

Dean nervously ran a hand through his hair multiple times on the drive over and hoped Cas wouldn’t notice since he didn’t want to give away the surprise. 

“What are we doing here?” Cas asked when Dean drove through the front gates of Lawrence Military Academy. 

“Do you trust me?” Dean replied.

“You know I do,” Cas answered. 

Dean parked and walked around the car to open Cas’s door and lead him out by the hand. He led Cas to the side of the dorm that used to be theirs what felt like a long time ago. 

“Remember seven years ago when we met?” Dean started.

“How could I forget? You made quite the impression,” Cas said with a small smile.

“I never would have guessed then that we would be here today and I never would have guessed that you would be the best thing that ever happened to me. You make me better and you make me want to be better. You stood by my side through so much and I love you, Castiel Novak.”

Dean could tell by Cas’s wide grin that he knew were this was going. Dean dropped to one knee and pulled the ring out of his pocket. It was a silver band in a black box and he popped it open.

“Will you marry me?” Dean asked.

“Yes, Dean. Of course,” Cas answered, taking the ring and putting it on before pulling Dean to his feet and kissing him.

Cas rested their foreheads together. 

“Does this mean you do what I say when we’re married?” Cas asked. 

“I don’t know, I kind of have trouble with authority,” Dean smirked.

Cas kissed Dean again.

“Don’t I know it,” Cas said. “Let’s go home. We have a wedding to plan.”

Dean kissed his fiancé before leading him back to the car.

**Author's Note:**

> I learned stuff about military schools online so I apologize if anything is incorrect. I tagged the non Dean/Cas relationships but they won't be a huge part if that's what you're looking for. Chapter titles will be songs which of course don't belong to me and neither do these characters. My tumblr, if you want, is jensenisafallenangel.tumblr.com. Thanks for reading!


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